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Thread: We broke up but we still love eachother.

  1. #1
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    We broke up but we still love eachother.

    Yesterday evening my boyfriend and i broke up. We had been together for a year.

    it was his decision as he has been doing badly at work lately, and he thinks that being with me is a distraction.
    He said he still loves me, and i know he does because i have never seen him that upset before.
    I'm completely in love with him and believe he is the one.

    He has thought about his decision to break up with me for over 2weeks and has said that it's the right thing to do.
    I don't agree by any means. I think that he lacks motivation and work ethic, and that it's not me that is the problem.
    I suggested seeing eachother less, but he said that it's the pure thought of me that makes him distracted.

    He said that maybe we could get back together after he gets some results from an observation in February...
    If the results are bad, he says he will get back with me, as it proves that i'm not the problem.

    I literally think he is the one. I don't know how to cope or how to make him see he has made the wrong decision.

    Please, Please help me.

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    If he needs some space, then give it to him. But be aware that the relationship is already flailing on his end. Just bear in mind that the reasons that he's giving you may not be true or is more secondary to the real thing.

    Be strong and if things don't work out, make sure you have some damage control plan.

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    He said that maybe we could get back together after he gets some results from an observation in February...
    If the results are bad, he says he will get back with me, as it proves that i'm not the problem.
    Seems like a totally lame excuse to keep you on the hook while he experiments elsewhere. On the odd chance that his reasoning is true and he actually believes that it's true, I suggest you stop bothering him and go zero contact. If you keep bothering him about it and he does lousy, then he'll blame it on you for bugging him about the break up and keeping his mind on you.

    Don't wait around for him though, do your best to heal from the break up by keeping busy, hanging with friends, doing things you like to do, joining a gym etc. and even casually date other men if you feel you can be a good date and not be pining away for a guy that would break up with you and believe that loving someone is the reason why he does poorly at the job.
    “The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs.” ~Joan Didion

  4. #4
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    Move on and start seeing other guys. It will distract you from your feelings while you move on, and he'll probably freak out and come crawling back when he finds out. Only question is, would you still want him at that point?

  5. #5
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    If two people genuinely love each other then they stay together don't they? What they do not do is break up.

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