I think he likes me, but how can I tell him I am not interested?

[iamminzy]

I think this guy likes me, but I don't like him? I mean he's not a bad guy despite the fact that he has bad temper, but I am just not interested. His friends been asking me what's up between me and him and thought we might have something going on. We don't... My friend who knew him since high school told me to avoid him at all cost.

Well I didn't listen. I asked him for a ride couple times to the club since he seem to be willing to drive people around especially girls as my friend told me. I had no choice but to ask him for a ride since my friend wanted to go and she already paid for her halloween event ticket. I asked him if he can get me in for free since I was broke and he said he could and he would be able to come up with a plan since he is the promoter. (My brother is a DJ and the managers and promoters all know me) Anyways, he ended up paying for my ticket which was like $45 or $50 i dont know. His friend won't tell me how much he paid for my ticket... He said he will take care of everything.

Anyways, a few times he asked me to go eat, go to shooting range, and he said he can watch movie with me. I rejected all the offers. Every time I got out with a guy alone, they end up liking me.

he invited me to his thanksgiving dinner with his family since I wasn't really celebrating it with mine, but I rejected and then he invited me to another thanksgiving dinner with his friends and I went since I never been invited to one. To my surprise, it was a high school reunion gathering and I felt awkward. His friends asked me if it seemed weird that he asked me to the thanksgiving dinner. They think he likes me and think I broke his heart. he was sick and still showed up at the club. I think he was trying to give me a surprise and wanted to see me. he tried to protect me from someone that night but then I left him and clung onto my guy friend because it was creeping me out that he is sick and still came out. He was so emo that night...

Last saturday, he was even more emo when I asked his friend (that I have seen and talked to for the past few weeks) to drive me and he asked him to take me home safely in a emo tone... eh... I don't want to be mean, but I have to be cruel. I don't want to tell him I am not interested in him because I heard he gets depressed and emo. I mean for a long time because he gets really attached. What should I do?

I am flattered that he likes me and tries to baby/protect me, but I don't want to hurt him...

[bulrush]

"I'm not interested. You are nice, but will always be a friend to me, no more. You are in the friend zone. You are not my type. I'm gay. I am a leper. My twin's head is under my shirt, like in 'Total Recall'. "

[GPLOC]

Just tell him that you aren't interested. Just tell the truth of it. Don't be mean or mocking ^^ 'I am a leper', just tell him. But I also have to point out, this is totally your own fault. You asked him for a ride, got him to pay your ticket (which was incredibly nice of him), then he invited you to a dinner, which you refused, (giving him massive mixed signals here), then you accept after all because you have nowhere else to go. To me that sounds like using someone. So before you go blaming this guy, take a stark, hard look at your own behaviour towards men. He also tried to shield you from some guy coming onto you, (bearing in mind, by all recognition, he sees it like; you are with him tonight), then you call HIM the creep? I'm sorry, but this is more your fault than his. I think you should apologize for leading him on.

[GPLOC]

And honestly, just because 'your friend' warns you off and tell you how 'emo' he gets, doesn't mean it's true. To me he sounds like a genuine, interested guy. And a nice, patient one at that. If I were him I'd have dropped you like a hot potato by now.

[poathomson]

Sorry but I do agree that you were very much leading him on, asking for drives, and if he can pull strings to get you a ticket. And being one to listen to a friends warning about a man being emo is never the way to go, be a individual and make your own perception about a man. In school I was insane about this one man, he was one everyone "warned" about. Like the man from '10 things I hate about you', people always rumored that he had been in jail and killed people before, it was all because he was a quiet, very tall, dark dressing man, and all of the rumors were false. Like said I also believe he sounds like a interesting man, but you won't give him the time of day to see that he is.

[iamminzy]

his friends from high school told me he gets emo... n he did look emo that day...They also told me he falls for girls easily. He's also give another girl a ride and dude she using him like a dog. He picks her up from home to work , from work to home. Last time he told me he had ot help her buy socks for her costume. He was last resource for a ride since my other friend was being a jerk.

he asked the same girl to go to the thanksgiving dinner too and she canceled on him and said she will celebrate it with her friends. I guess that's when he asked me if I wanted to go. I heard he likes her too, that's why he be driving her around and doing stuff for her. He's the type of guy that will do stuff for people and put them ahead of himself and doesn't ask for anything in return.

I know he's a great guy and he is clearly interesting, but I have stopped asking for a ride. I only asked him for a few rides and have rejected all his offer when he asked me to hang out with him. I only went to the thanksgiving dinner because my family hardly celebrates it.

I have stopped asking him to give me a ride....

[bpem]

You're using him. I think you're being incredibly selfish and inconsiderate of the poor guy's feelings. Give him a bit a decency and tell him straight up that you aren't interested. I'd hate for him to be scarred any more.

[iamminzy]

i am not being selfish. I admit I did use him, but I am not selfish. I have already diminished my contact with him because i don't want to lead him on and hurt his feelings. I still continue to be his friend. I have stopped asking him to give me rides..... >_<

[valmont]

lmao..."when I hang out with guys alone they end up liking me".

from what you wrote, you seem incredibly selfish and crave attention.

good luck with your life.

[Noslen09]

You used him... but you're not selfish? Am I the only person confused by this claim? You used him to get a ride because you had no other way to get around, even though it would lead him on. You're either selfish or completely oblivious; pick one.

Excuse my confrontational choice of words here, but I could identify with this poor guy. I was once the sad puppy dog of a guy who would do almost anything for the girl. I was essentially a boy toy. And it never got me anywhere. I was too stupid to know any better.

Just be honest with the guy and let him know where you stand in the situation. It's the least you could do for putting the guy on an emotional roller coaster. It hurts more to be given hope and have it all taken away in the end.

[iamminzy]

yes I asked for a ride because I needed it, if I didn't need it then I wouldn't have asked. Btw, I didn't know him that well then and he offered a ride when I didn't ask. I didn't know he will fall for girls that easily. I only met in october and talked to him a few times. I asked him during a ride during the halloween event and asked for a few rides since my girl friend wanted to go clubbing and my other guy friends don't wanna go. If he lived far away from me, then no I won't ask him for a ride.

He offered to drive me to work, and I said no because I don't want to waste his gas and I'm just taking the bus. If I using him, then I would keep asking him for a ride and not care about his feelings. I only asked for a few rides since he lives near me. I didn't know he will like me that way until he asked for my opinion if he should go clubbing or not since he was sick and I told him its great if he can come but if he still sick, he should stay home and rest more. I mean I don't mind him coming, but I thought he wasn't going to go. And I was surprised and he made things really awkward for me.

If you say I messed up asking for a ride, then I don't know what to say cuz the other girl ask him for a ride all the time so beats me... The girl has a boyfriend yet he still drives her around and do things for her when she needs help. I ain't that type of girl and I never want to use people like that. He ain't my boy toy....

he hasn;'t even made a move on me yet....

[BackUpOrGetStng]

If you say I messed up asking for a ride, then I don't know what to say cuz the other girl ask him for a ride all the time so beats me... The girl has a boyfriend yet he still drives her around and do things for her when she needs help. I ain't that type of girl and I never want to use people like that. He ain't my boy toy....

he hasn;'t even made a move on me yet....

The other girl is a selfish bitch, as are you.

The last sentence of your last post really threw me off too. What if he were to make a move on you, would that change anything?