Can a Man tell when his partner isn't a Virgin?

[surfhb]

Exactly! Another conservative douche bag taking air from the rest of us

[qwertz]

No. Wow! Going to a sex shop to pick up a nice big dildo? So much for Old Fashioned Values! The irony can be cut with a knife

Besides, most men prefer experienced women. The thought of sleeping with a virgin makes me cringe.

Ok.....after reading your biography, I can understand why you feel this way. Gag me with a spoon!

Only a women would say such a thing. Are you a virgin? How old are you? Are you religious? Your comment Makes no sense in the real world. Unless you follow some religuous doctrine, How many guys are willingto fall in love with you without a sexual relationship? Sex is natural. It's not a tool and shouldn't be used as a bargaining chip.....whether it's about you or someone else.

^^^ all these are why we need the god damn thanks button back!

[Fjortis]

Oh and if you aren't you can still sort the jerks from the nice guys by saying no. Being sexually active doesn't mean you have to sleep with everyone who asks.

I am not saying that everyone who asks you to have sex with them before merriage is a jerk, it can be a normal nice guy, who just did not know you had this belief. And then if you are not a virgin and tell him no, then the first question that is going to come to mind of this guy will be-- then how come you slept with some other guy and don't want to do this with me, do you love me less or do you not trust me etc, you can explain to him all you want but still at the back of his mind there will be this sense of unfairness, the sense of double standards, the conflict that will come up to the surface every once in a while, so it will be even harder for him to wait for marriage in this case.. Of course you can lie and say to him you are a virgin, but then your relationship will start with a lie, and chances are if he sticks around he will find out you are not. Of course you can tell him a bunch of lies to explain your non-virgin-like response to the "first sex" but you will have to go to all these lies, and if you are a good person, it will make you feel bad and guilty to do this to him..

[searock]

If a woman has sex with a guy it doesn't mean that she will agree to have sex with any other guy after that! If she says no to a guy, he has no reason to feel like he is being treated unfairly. Just as she has no reason to lie to him about her virginity. Why would there be the need to?! Same thing goes for guys of course.

[searock]

I can't edit my posts today (don't know why) so I'll just add the obvious here: being a virgin is NOT the only reason for a woman to not want to have sex.

[MaidenMinx]

I am not saying that everyone who asks you to have sex with them before merriage is a jerk, it can be a normal nice guy, who just did not know you had this belief. And then if you are not a virgin and tell him no, then the first question that is going to come to mind of this guy will be-- then how come you slept with some other guy and don't want to do this with me, do you love me less or do you not trust me etc, you can explain to him all you want but still at the back of his mind there will be this sense of unfairness, the sense of double standards, the conflict that will come up to the surface every once in a while, so it will be even harder for him to wait for marriage in this case.. Of course you can lie and say to him you are a virgin, but then your relationship will start with a lie, and chances are if he sticks around he will find out you are not. Of course you can tell him a bunch of lies to explain your non-virgin-like response to the "first sex" but you will have to go to all these lies, and if you are a good person, it will make you feel bad and guilty to do this to him..

Before you become an expert on what sex does to relationships, you have to have sex!!

When I decided to become celibate after quite some time of being sexually active, guys actually found it intriguing.My husband found it refreshing and was quite happy to take it slow with me and not rush into anything. He didn't feel slighted because I had jumped in the sack with guys in the past. He knew he wasn't just a one night stand and that we had plenty of time to enjoy each others company and all that came with it. Yes we had sex before marriage. Out of the 8.5 years we've been together we've only been married for the .5.

Again, if you want to wait til marriage, that's great and good for you. DO NOT think you have the experience or insight to tell other people how not doing it your way will affect them. You have no idea.

[MaidenMinx]

I can't edit my posts today (don't know why) so I'll just add the obvious here: being a virgin is NOT the only reason for a woman to not want to have sex.

I would love to be able to thank this...

[surfhb]

Before you become an expert on what sex does to relationships, you have to have sex!!

I think we should stop the thread right there. Well said!

[Fjortis]

I think we should stop the thread right there. Well said!

well there's also what refusing to have sex before marriage does to relationships And someone who never refused their partner to have sex can't be an expert either

[MaidenMinx]

well there's also what refusing to have sex before marriage does to relationships And someone who never refused their partner to have sex can't be an expert either

And we'll say it once again for those that don't get it, you don't have to be a virgin to refuse your partner sex and in an understanding, mature relationship it won't cause problems.

[stuckies]

funny. I 'lost' it later in life to a younger experienced guy. He had NO idea. Go with the flow, relax, do what feels good, be in to the person you're with. What's to learn

[carl1222]

Well, if he inspects your hymen, then he might guess that you are/are not a virgin. Of course, hymens can be broken for other reasons.

Hmmmm ... an idea for a new country song:

"You broke my hymen then you broke my heart ..."

[Sixpacj]

This situation is slightly embarassing, but...

I have pretty old-school values and intend to remain a virgin until I'm married. However, due to some teenage hormones or something, I think about sex about as often as the average male supposedly does (every few seconds). And I'm very tempted to try out this dildo that looks like it feels very good. However, I don't want my first actual human partner (who is hopefully my future husband) to think I'm not a virgin because I've been using a dildo.
I've been reading around and have read mixed things...so I'm asking, (besides the blood) does intercourse with women who haven't yet been penetrated really feel any different from women who have?

It usually feels very awkward, like she is tense and has no idea what to do. This is a pretty clear give-away, blood or no blood.

[Sixpacj]

Generally speaking, men who want virgins are either virgins themselves, very inexperienced, or very untalented in bed.

Says who? Says an experienced MAN named vashti?

[Sixpacj]

If you are a vergin it is good for you. And don't ever believe a guy who says something about "buying a car without test drive" or "good luck finding someone who will marry you" and stuff like that. Obviously when they tell you this they want you to have this test drive with THEM lol, they say those things when they want sex so they can manipulate you into having sex with THEM, no THEY DON'T care that no one is going to marry you or that you are going to have sexual problems they are just trying to manipulate you into having sex with THEM right NOW. So if anyone ever tells you that, just tell them you are going to take it into consideration and maybe do it with one of your male friends, they are going to be so frustrated haha. Being a virgin gives you this advantage of having people who are in lust with you leave and people who are in Love with you stay. Filters out all the selfish people who do not care about you pretty well.

What is she wants to have sex as well?