what makes a girl desirable in the eyes of men in their 20s?

[andstuff]

Hi,

I would be grateful for any feedback re: what sort of qualities/appearances/general outlook men in their 20s find attractive and desirable in girls? I've been finding myself attractive to the wrong age group so just thinking of rejigging myself

Most notably, I've been told I look too young and touching, as if i needed to be protected and taken care of, and this is the last thing in the world i need - might that be an issue? I am just disgusted by all the 35 year olds thinking they can convince me to get laid T_T

Cheers in advance

[vashti]

if you are attractive to an older man rather than a younger one, well that's probably who you should be with.

Terrible advice (sorry CAM). I married someone older, and do you know what *really* happens? The younger partner continues to grow up, and the older is done, so the younger one ends up outgrowing them in a couple of years.

Be patient, andstuff. There is an age-appropriate guy out there who will be perfect for you. The problem is that women tend to get sick of waiting for them to show up, and maybe a little bit scared that he won't, and they end up settling for less than they want.

[Bonfire]

guy out there who will be perfect for you.

And the stars will align and bring you two magically together. A rainbow will appear and doves will soar the sky.

The problem is that women tend to get sick of waiting for them to show up, and maybe a little bit scared that he won't, and they end up settling for less than they want.

This I agree. No one should simply settle. But don't expect to find perfection. Everyone has flaws.

[vashti]

Please note (bonfire) that "perfect for you" and "perfect" are not the same thing. duh.

[Bonfire]

Please note (bonfire) that "perfect for you" and "perfect" are not the same thing. duh.

Both are similarly judge on account of perception is it not? So they are not that different.

[vashti]

Whatever CAM. I understand your defensiveness, but I think most people recognize there is much less an age/growth difference in the scenario you presented versus a young girl in their early 20s who is disgusted at the thought of being with a 35 year old man.

[smackie9]

Stop hanging out at places where there are 35 year olds. Change your look while you are at it. Get rid of that innocent persona be being more sexier and confident.

[smackie9]

Whatever CAM. I understand your defensiveness, but I think most people recognize there is much less an age/growth difference in the scenario you presented versus a young girl in their early 20s who is disgusted at the thought of being with a 35 year old man.

In my early 20's I too found 35 year old men too old to date......by the time I was 24 I was dating 19 to 20 year olds.

[sadie_genie]

Younger guys are more shy so you probably have to take the initiative to talk to them. 35 year old scouting young girls are usually desperate and have no shame so they scout out young girls thinking they are easy prey.

[Bonfire]

In my early 20's I too found 35 year old men too old to date......by the time I was 24 I was dating 19 to 20 year olds.

Did you meant 19 to 20 years older? Or did you actually mean you were dating younger guys?

To answer the original question, when I was in my early 20's, I was attracted to a girl simply if she had a pretty face. I didn't think much about compatibility.

[vashti]

Your 1st Response: Opportunistic
Your 2nd Response: Dismissive

You should read my whole response to the OP, rather than just cherry-picking based on a prejudiced view of me.

paranoid AND defensive.

But this isn't about YOU. My statement was a generality, which happens to be accurate. You would have realized this were you not so defensive.

[Drumzzz]

i'm turning 20 in september

i think my story is quite interesting here...

i go to some sort of club ran by young people
there i meet people between the ages of 14 and 30 (and ex-members, age approximately 30 - 50)
i never head a girlfriend before, but a couple months ago a 25 year old girl and me fell in love
1 problem, she still lives with her boyfriend
we feel really good around eachother and i love her sooooooo much... but still she hasn't been able to choose either 1 of us
ofcourse we fight about it
i get really sensitive cause she still hasn't made a choice
i think if she chooses me, we'd be like a normal couple...
dating younger guys/older girls istn't wrong or impossible

i also read a post that said 20 year old people can go through a lot
that's true
when i speak for myself i think i can say i had a rough year
i went through a depression and lost a couple of things
and now this girl
no... life isn't easy for a 20 year old guy neither

topic poster:
what i find attractive in a girl?
i actually can't define it
when i see her i just know
a great personality, cute, loving, beautiful....
yes it's true,when you look like a model you get more guys
but most of the time those people don't know howmuch 2 * 2 is
so that doesn't last long

just be yourself
i know it's hard to believe but there is someone that is perfect for you
you just have to be lucky to find that guy

[Bonfire]

Excuse my skeptism, but how is changing her style of clothes going to deter a 35 year old from hitting on her? Do you suggest she wear a burka?

[vashti]

Notice how you resort to ad hominem attacks. I'm not defensive or paranoid---I'm just fully in tune with your acerbic (that means "bitter" or "sharp") communication style.

BTW, how does a nurse have so much free time on her hands to dole out free treatments on LF so frequently? I was always under the impression that nurses were working their unionized fingers to the bone for $80,000+/year. Just curious.

Nurses have compressed work schedules - three 12.5 hour days, not that it matters since I am currently at home with a broken foot and ankle.

And I am growing bored of your defensiveness, which still does nothing to minimize my perspective, but I find it amusing you care so much about what I say that you choose to continue arguing with me, despite more inflammatory opinions being posted on this thread.

[vashti]

Excuse my skeptism, but how is changing her style of clothes going to deter a 35 year old from hitting on her? Do you suggest she wear a burka?

Do you not think the way a female dresses plays a role in the types of interactions she has with men? Of course it does...