Why does my bf and his mom make me feel like I am not good enough?

[bellaflor77]

Sometimes my bf and his mom make me feel like im not good enough for him.. and it really hurts..
His mom also talks about other girls he dated that were richer than me and come from a more wealthy family.
I dont understand his mom either, sometimes she says she would pay women to leave him aloneand sometimes she asks me if I would like to marry him.
Why do they act like this?

[Incognito]

Maybe they're in some kind of sick incestuous relationship. Maybe they are just horrible people. Maybe he is a momma's boy and she calls all of the shots. None of that matters though. The bottom line is that your boyfriend would defend you, even from his mom, if he really loved and respected you. In addition to that, any mom who pays women to leave their son alone has too much interest in their son's life. You need to get out of there and not look back. If they are both telling you that you aren't good enough they actually believe it to some extent. Staying and taking their crap only proves that they are somewhat right, because a self respecting woman would leave any man who belittles her and doesn't stand up for her.

[sadie_genie]

What is most important is if YOU think you are good enough and if you think you can hold your own. What does your parent's wealth have anything to do with you or your own character, right? Let her talk.

[Leo Lamaze]

You're not the first one to have an insufferable in-law. You can't change what your mother-in-law thinks of you. What matters here is that your boyfriend seems to be playing her game which is just 100% unacceptable. You and him are supposed to be a team, and in most situations like these, a steady and solid couple is able to just laugh at their parents' insufferable quirks --- together! This just won't work. Get out.

[bellaflor77]

What is most important is if YOU think you are good enough and if you think you can hold your own. What does your parent's wealth have anything to do with you or your own character, right? Let her talk.

His mom means that she wants a rich woman for his son. It has nothing to do with my character, though.

[Incognito]

His mom means that she wants a rich woman for his son. It has nothing to do with my character, though.

Why would she be trying to get a rich woman for her son anyway? Is he some kind of lazy loser? Most of the time parents try to get rich husbands for their daughters, not the other way around.

[vashti]

Why would she be trying to get a rich woman for her son anyway? Is he some kind of lazy loser? Most of the time parents try to get rich husbands for their daughters, not the other way around.

She probably wants to be sure she isn't marrying him for HIS money (or earning potential).

Parents are no less invested in who their sons marry than they are about who their daughters marry. Obviously, if someone is going to bring a new person into the fold, it's best if they are a good fit, and parents worry that a woman will walk off and take half their son's earnings, or run around on him, etc.

[bellaflor77]

She probably wants to be sure she isn't marrying him for HIS money (or earning potential).

Parents are no less invested in who their sons marry than they are about who their daughters marry. Obviously, if someone is going to bring a new person into the fold, it's best if they are a good fit, and parents worry that a woman will walk off and take half their son's earnings, or run around on him, etc.

She might be worried more about her money, than his money. I am not sure about his earning potential, he has only high school diploma, but I agree that his mom might be worried of women who could walk off and take half of his earning.

[Incognito]

She probably wants to be sure she isn't marrying him for HIS money (or earning potential).

Parents are no less invested in who their sons marry than they are about who their daughters marry. Obviously, if someone is going to bring a new person into the fold, it's best if they are a good fit, and parents worry that a woman will walk off and take half their son's earnings, or run around on him, etc.

Hmm, good point. I was looking at it as though they were all average income earners and she wanted her son to date a rich woman.

[sadie_genie]

She probably wants to be sure she isn't marrying him for HIS money (or earning potential).

Parents are no less invested in who their sons marry than they are about who their daughters marry. Obviously, if someone is going to bring a new person into the fold, it's best if they are a good fit, and parents worry that a woman will walk off and take half their son's earnings, or run around on him, etc.

But the OP in her first post said her mother wanted her son to marry a woman from a wealthy family. The wealth of her parents has nothing to do with her own earning potential or her own money.

[bellaflor77]

But the OP in her first post said her mother wanted her son to marry a woman from a wealthy family. The wealth of her parents has nothing to do with her own earning potential or her own money.

I remember his mom telling him in front of me he should make a good impression with girls whose parents were car dealers or had businesses.

[Incognito]

Oh, I see.... she's a bitch. Yeah, you need to just get out of there since its obvious that she is very materialistic and she has taught her son the same (since you say that he makes the same types of comments to you).

[pisces25]

Because you allow them to make you feel this way. If you don't like the way he makes you feel best you get outta there.

[Boisdevie]

Stop taking this shit from both of them. Have some self respect and tell them both to get stuffed.

[smackie9]

Anyways bella dear when you marry a man, you marry into his family. Your future mother in law is rude, controlling, and has a lack of respect for not only you but her son too. Would you want your future children exposed to someone like that? And have a husband that won't stand up for you? The writing is on the wall. Get out of this relationship, because being married to this guy will be a living nightmare.