Common trend in the online dating world?

[TheTooya]

Well, I have tried my hand at online dating, and I'm left.. a little perplexed.

The trend I have seen is: we chat for a bit, I ask them out to lunch/coffee. I met a few people that, after meeting, I was not interested in, but I at least told them I wasn't interested (so it can't be karma out to get me!)

However, there were a few people that things seem to click really well, we would talk for a few weeks, exchange numbers, set up for a date, but at the last minute, right before the date, she would text me saying shes busy, she will text a time when shes free... and then she disappears (deletes account, never texts me back). And this happened multiple times... <_<

Am I doing something wrong, or is this just part of the process?
Success/fail stories would be interesting to hear

[Boisdevie]

Online it's so easy to mess around. Perhaps she was in a relationship and was looking for a diversion? Or cold feet? Hard to tell.

[uri]

so it can't be karma out to get me!)

I don't think there is such a thing as karma anyway because if there really was such as thing as karma, a lot of bad people in this world would have been punished for what they are doing.

[oldskool83]

while online made it easy years ago....now its just hard. people start and stop talking for all kinda reasons. alot times ive seen women that will make an account, snag a guy, break up make a new one same day, delete it little later. not everyones like that but all in all dating sucks.

[smackie9]

Well, I have tried my hand at online dating, and I'm left.. a little perplexed.

The trend I have seen is: we chat for a bit, I ask them out to lunch/coffee. I met a few people that, after meeting, I was not interested in, but I at least told them I wasn't interested (so it can't be karma out to get me!)

However, there were a few people that things seem to click really well, we would talk for a few weeks, exchange numbers, set up for a date, but at the last minute, right before the date, she would text me saying shes busy, she will text a time when shes free... and then she disappears (deletes account, never texts me back). And this happened multiple times... <_<

Am I doing something wrong, or is this just part of the process?
Success/fail stories would be interesting to hear

They found someone better. Remember you are competing with 200 other guys. If the girl is decent enough she has the pick of the crop.

[bulrush]

I think they found someone better. Most likely. Nothing wrong with you so try not to get discouraged. You will see a lot of this. The dating world is cut throat. Some people get to know multiple dates at once, then choose the best one to pursue for a long-term thing. You should too.

[TheTooya]

@smackie9, @Boisdevie
I do agree, cold feet or found someone better are the root reasons, I understand both those reasons and respect both of them as well . I'm just curious if it is a common 'thing' to "post-pone" a date and cut contact?

I saw a cute youtube clip ([url]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cfwwHa-7Ux8&list=LLNHe81KjuGx_RHVD9u8eqBg&index=49&featur e=plpp_video[/url]) that was trying to push the message that even the nicest people can disregard someone on the other end of an online interaction.

@bulrush
I admittedly got a little discouraged, mostly because I'm use to the traditional, ask a person you know out, see what it goes from there. Unfortunately almost everyone I know are from work (no-no territory), or from judo (no-girl territory). Online seems interesting, maybe I'll try and pick it up again.

[smackie9]

@smackie9, @Boisdevie
I do agree, cold feet or found someone better are the root reasons, I understand both those reasons and respect both of them as well . I'm just curious if it is a common 'thing' to "post-pone" a date and cut contact?

Like I said if the girl is decent, with 200 guys out there, she can pretty much pick and choose. "post-pone" means I agreed to a date with this much cuter guys so I'm going to check it out. "cut contact" means, it turns out that guy was awesome so I'm going to keep seeing him. Dating is very competitive no matter if you look on line or go to a bar.....there is really no difference. It's better to not look so hard and let them find you.

[BoredGeorge]

Well, I have tried my hand at online dating, and I'm left.. a little perplexed.

The trend I have seen is: we chat for a bit, I ask them out to lunch/coffee. I met a few people that, after meeting, I was not interested in, but I at least told them I wasn't interested (so it can't be karma out to get me!)

However, there were a few people that things seem to click really well, we would talk for a few weeks, exchange numbers, set up for a date, but at the last minute, right before the date, she would text me saying shes busy, she will text a time when shes free... and then she disappears (deletes account, never texts me back). And this happened multiple times... <_<

Am I doing something wrong, or is this just part of the process?
Success/fail stories would be interesting to hear

I have no idea. Bitches be crazy like that. Has happened to me twice. Maybe they see you from a distance first, then decide they're not interested?

[TheTooya]

Dating is very competitive no matter if you look on line or go to a bar.....there is really no difference. It's better to not look so hard and let them find you.

Ah, well I put 'finding a relationship' for a rest for a few months, its more of a nice to have at this point.

[bcgirl]

well many girls have boyfriends/husbands and when they are in a fight with their boyfriends they will log onto a dating site to meet a guy. If her and they boyfriend end up making up...well she has no use for you and...delete.

Another thing is that girls on dating sites have way more options than guys. Girls can be picky if there are 10 guys that want a date with her on Friday night....she can say yes to all of them and then narrow it down to just one last minute if she wanted.

[smackie9]

Ah, well I put 'finding a relationship' for a rest for a few months, its more of a nice to have at this point.

I remember how much I hated dating when I was single......it's crappy for everyone.

[TheTooya]

I remember how much I hated dating when I was single......it's crappy for everyone.

Amen to that.

[dem862]

You're not doing anything wrong. That is how it goes. I completely gave up on-line dating because it was so flaky. Try meetup.com. You can meet women with common interests, and you can get some idea of who they are before you ask them out. And there are usually a lot more women at these meetups than men. Of course, it depends on the function and your location. But I found that dating sites greatly favor the female, while meetups greatly favor the male.

[smackie9]

Ya they have a club in Vancouver for singles where they arrange different activities so you can meet and greet other singles....activities like volley ball to cooking classes. Maybe they have something like that where you live.