So, about last night.

[Mathias]

It looks like I haven't actually posted a topic in about four years, so here we go.

Background: I'm 29, single (but have been on several dates with someone/sexually active), got out of a 4-year long relationship with an engagement about six months ago.

So, my friend is having a birthday party at his house last night. I had met this girl (not the same as above) at a bar while hanging out with him before. She seemed into me then. As the night goes on, she comes over to where my friends and I are playing simple drinking games. We're probably drunk at about 1:00, but I wouldn't say completely hammered or anything.

We go over and talk with another guy who's obviously into her as well. She and I talk about some of the relationship problems we've had, where we are in life, not taking things too seriously, etc. She mentions her party next weekend, I put my number in her phone so she can let me know.

At about 3:00, people start leaving. She stays behind, I'm ready to sleep on my friend's couch. We talk for a bit, watch a show, and then I initiate kissing her, and we start making out (second-baseish for the detail-oriented).

After a while of this, she suddenly decides she has to go. She starts mentioning "I thought you were going to just let things happen", etc. That part is sticking with me a bit. I'm assuming this is just a defense mechanism so she didn't sleep with me, but I'm obviously a bit nervous that I turned her off. She's only a casual friend of my friend, but I certainly don't want things to be weird between me and him - he's a good guy.

I'm just overthinking this, right?

[pisces25]

Maybe she decided she wants you to chase her like it all happened too easily to get to that point?

Or she has a fear that something like that means it is going to turn into a relationship and she doesn't want that?

Pretty mixed signals. Sorry I am probably not much help. But even us women can't work other women out sometimes.

[Wakeup]

It looks like I haven't actually posted a topic in about four years, so here we go.

Background: I'm 29, single (but have been on several dates with someone/sexually active), got out of a 4-year long relationship with an engagement about six months ago.

So, my friend is having a birthday party at his house last night. I had met this girl (not the same as above) at a bar while hanging out with him before. She seemed into me then. As the night goes on, she comes over to where my friends and I are playing simple drinking games. We're probably drunk at about 1:00, but I wouldn't say completely hammered or anything.

We go over and talk with another guy who's obviously into her as well. She and I talk about some of the relationship problems we've had, where we are in life, not taking things too seriously, etc. She mentions her party next weekend, I put my number in her phone so she can let me know.

At about 3:00, people start leaving. She stays behind, I'm ready to sleep on my friend's couch. We talk for a bit, watch a show, and then I initiate kissing her, and we start making out (second-baseish for the detail-oriented).

After a while of this, she suddenly decides she has to go. She starts mentioning "I thought you were going to just let things happen", etc. That part is sticking with me a bit. I'm assuming this is just a defense mechanism so she didn't sleep with me, but I'm obviously a bit nervous that I turned her off. She's only a casual friend of my friend, but I certainly don't want things to be weird between me and him - he's a good guy.

I'm just overthinking this, right?

It's hard to tell what she was thinking though it could go two ways.
1. She thought you weren't going fast enough for her, like you were stalling and didn't just screw her then and there.. you took too long to "conquer" her.

2. She suddenly felt that she was being too easy and that you handn't even asked her out proper and she may have thought she would think she was turning this into something sexual only if she were to continue.

If you ask her out and she says no, then she just simply changed her mind about you all together... or so it would seem

Her statement: "I thought you were going to just let things happen", can be taken two ways.

[smackie9]

Maybe she was into it at first and then ran it through her mind that it wasn't such a good idea...nothing personal. Just go to her party and see what direction things will go.