broken relationships

[brokenhearts]

Hi....I'm new to this forum,

I had one big problems in my relationship with a guy right now.We been together for almos 2 1/2 years now. The relationships is going fine until one day he told me that the feelings for me had faded away. The reasons behind this was that during ours relationships, i had tie him so tight that he could not breath. He said he needed space for himself as well as his family n frens.
Last time when we were together, i used to make him stay with me all days n all the time. I know i had done wrong n learn my lesson well. In order to save this relationship, we make a promise that we only see each other during weekends. it's been 3 weeks oredi n he said that the feelings for is still the same n he himself don't think it will gets better.
i love this guy very much. i can't afford to lose him. Can u please help me what to do or should i just wait for miracle to happen? Or do u guys think that he will come back to me eventually. FIY, he said that the feelings for is not totally lost because he ranks me higher than his best freinds. Please help?

[JohnsonROd]

The only thing I can say is that if you're already giving him enough space (and it sounds like you are) then there is something else about the relationship that isn't satisfying him.

Apparantly he says he's losing interest, well in that case I'm sorry to say this, but there isn't much you can do about it. I myself just broke up with my girlfriend for losing physical attraction to her, and I believe that if s/he is the one for you then losing interest won't happen.

Ask him for the real reason he's been losing interest, because space isn't the real reason.

If it's not something you can resolve, then move on- your true love is out there waiting for you.

[Gab]

Brokenheart,

I am in the same situation as you are. I been w/ my boyfriend for almost 2 years now and I love him very much. But, recently thing haven't gone so smoothly, now he's asking for space. I know that parting from the one you love is the hardest thing to do. But, if space is what he really needed then I would suggest that you be strong and give him that space. If he really love you, then one day he will realize how special you are to him. Just go about doing your own thing.

As the old saying" absences make the heart grows fonder". I hope that everything will turn out okay for you as well as for me.

[brokenhearts]

thanx for ur advise...

space is all that he wants. He said that he still loves me a little. He still cares for me. Now we are temporary breaking up for one months to test our love. I miss him alot right now even though it was only 2 days n i have a month to go on. i will try my best n hope that he will realize that he still loves me.

n for gab, hope that urs relationships will turn to better. If that happen just ley me know, ok?

[julie]

Brokenhearts and Gab -

Its funny how Ive actually lived through everyones problems on this bored..

Im not going to sugar coat this at all. Please dont take offense to this.

One of my ex boyfriend's (who i loved dearly) was the nicest guy in the world. Very nice. very chivalrous, very attentive, very hot, etc. But he was TOO MUCH. Too attentive, too chivalrous, too SMOTHERING.

I couldnt breathe. It seemed like everywhere I turned, he was there. Everywhere I looked, I saw him (literallY). It was AWFUL.

You know how little kids on roadt trips constantly ask their parents "Are we there yet?" like every 5 seconds? You want to pull your hair out because you cant even think about the scenery -they wont stop.

Something like that. Sometimes its too much. I needed space. But I still loved him. I needed to just let him let me be for a while and feel free. Not single free - but running through fields on a mountain top free. I would probably still be with him if he did just that.

He didnt. And now when I think of him, I still feel smothered. Like I think of suffocation when I think back to him. I dont even want to think of him anymore. Its like food. If someone makes you eat cookies for the rest of you life only, you're going to never want to see cookies again.

My crazy suggestion is to fade away.. Tell him that you love him and you care about him, but your going to leave him alone. Entirely. Do it. Then tell him if he wants to hang out, you can. But go out. and eventually start seeing other people. If and when he realizes what he's missing, he'll be back. And maybe hopefully by then, you'll be too wrapped up in your OWN life, that you wont even care anymore.

Thats what you shoot for.

[brokenhearts]

Thanks julie,

I started to feel better now. Luckily I got a bunch of very understanding frens. They all advise me to be strong n wait for one months to see how's this relationships will go. I tell myself that even if he doesn't want me, eventually i will find someone else better. I told myself that i did not lose anything but HE because during our relationships i done everything I can to be a good gf of his n when this problems occurs I did change myself but I told him I needed time. He just don't understand me.

what u say is true. If he really loves me he will come back to me n maybe that time it's me who doesn't want to continue this relationships.

[julie]

Yes, but the bottom line is your NOT WAITING. You're giving him a fair chance to take you back, but you have to live your life as if he never entered it.

[brokenhearts]

julie,

Each n every day i feel it's feel hard to live. He did called me today but due to some important things to say to me. He did asked me how r u feeling n did i cry every day. I sounded bored n he asked me y. I told him that i did not want to talk to him n he asked me y n sure there's a reason behind it. I did told him y n io said goodbye. But deep down inside i really love him! Am i doing the right thing?

[julie]

Hard to live? YOu have been with this guy for 2 years. Only 2 years out of your lifetime. You lived without him before that, so this is no reason to talk like that.

Tell him that he said to give him space, and thats what your doing. He has to get his shit straightened out first before you talk to him. Tell him to stop messing with your head before he makes himself an enemy.

Christ woman, pull yourself together already!