Help please Advice needed on ex urgently

[Tanz26]

Hi there, I recently broke up with my partner of a yr and ten months. its been almost 3 months since we split up and he is still trying to get me back, he loves me to peices and is a really good guy but the reason i broke it off was to really make him see he needed help. In a previous relationship i had been made to feel worthless and minipulated into doing stuff i never should of done i wasnt aloud to see my friends or nothing i had also been hit threatened etc you name it it happened. Anyway back to my current break up reason was he has a bad temper will flip over silliest of things he threatened me one day and it really et away at me i shut him out and just put up this massive wall cause i didnt want to get hurt again (im seeing my own counsellor), anyway after he threatened me he agreed to get help things were good until his counsellor said she had seen him enough and he'd be ok he then threatened me again over silly crap, we wouldnt stop arguing after that and i just couldnt take it anymore so i told him to move out, about 3 wks after we split after abusive texts telling me to kill myself etc he finally realised he had a problem and went back and got more help he is still seeing his counsellor now, however if he doesnt like what im doing he looses it if i dont text back he looses it,he will just show up at my house, he put a hole in my wall the other day, recently he told me to hang myself and so my mate texted him and he texted back saying i hope shes hanging from the shed, he will then text next day saying how much he loves me etc. its really messing with my head. Last weekend a guy from his hometown was burnt and i read in paper a 25 yr old guy had been burnt and i freaked out i thought it was him so i texted him and he went nuts at me for texting him cause i had told him to leave me alone i just cant seem to win even though we not together i still care. If he hadnt had such a temper we'd prob be married. i just dont know what to do my family my friends all tell me to run and i want to run but there's just this little something stopping me, I dont love him like i used to he constantly pisses me off like last night throwing my past in my fast going at least i didnt do this and that when i beat myself up everyday for what i did. Please help me im 26 i have been out of home since i was 16 i love my friends and family but he just doesnt like me spending time with anyone other than him if i do something he doesnt like its all on, we arent together but i do miss him and i do care but im over all this crap and i really dont know what to do anymore, please please give me some much needed advice. i want to settle down have a family etc but i just dont know where im going or who i am anymore PLease HElp me what would you do i really dont think he is ever going to change

[Please]

You need to get out of this relationship or whatever this is as quickly as possible.

I don't see any good here and apparently, neither do you.

By writing this post, you had your own answer in your mind and it probably was: I don't want to be here dealing with this.

So, don't.

No one ever deserves to be mentally abused like this. Hell, it's mental, emotional and potentially physical.

This is not a good guy, he will never change no matter HOW much counselling he gets. Something in his past makes him act this way.

Since you can't change the past, you can't change a person.

Get out of this rut NOW and save yourself.

[ness85]

You have to be strong. There is not one reason for you to stay in that relationship. I have had 2 long term relationships and was verbally abused in both. I just recently got out of my longest one and I know I deserve better. As do you. Verbal abuse can be just as bad or worse than physical abuse. The bruises will eventually go away but the words will forever be in your mind. Move on. Change your number, get a restraining order. Do what you gotta do to get your self worth and happiness back .

[Harry1]

it is amazing!

[Zoya]

you know that you deserve better and you want better for urself but at the same time ur just scared that wat if u were wrong..in this case even if ur wrong (even if he does rlly love u) i hardly think he will change even with all the counselling. People do change but not that much, to go from non-abusive to abusive is extremely difficult. For him thats how he knows to express himself, and its hard to fight that off when u have been living like that for soo long. Thats why i think u shud get away now while its still early before things get worse. I get that u still have something for him deep down thats making you want to stay (believe me i get that) but u know wats good for u. Follow that instinct, the rest will work itself out. Dont be worried about being lonely or missing him. U will, u'll miss the good moments you guys have had but eventually it gets easier to just think abt the good moments and just be happy with where you are right now. Plus ur only 26, trust me there are other guys out there who will treat u right and give you wat u deserve. No one deserves to be physically or emotionally abused, even if its someone they love thats abussing them...

[Angellic]

He sounds like a total narcissist: emotionally manipulative, abusive, and takes enjoyment from making your life miserable. Clearly you have your own issues to deal with (like why you are attracted to abusive men), but please end this relationship. It isn't healthy and no good will come of it.

[Jason2]

wonderful

[kim_winky]

I am sorry about your problems,i was once in a problem like this,my home was crumbled until i met a spiritualist who helped me with a powerful love spell,you can contact him for help on [email]elebuibon@ymail.com[/email]
he might help you too
Kimmy