"Girlfriend" ignoring me? Long text, take your time ;D

[theron]

Greetings from Finland!

I've spent few months (4 to be exact) with a girl I've known for about 2 years. (Old friend, and a ex-girlfriend of my friend. ouch)

It all started when she started texting me all of the sudden. She asked how my days went in school and so on...
Later on, we started talking even more, sending messages in facebook and even seeing each other at hers place.

We both live in the same city during the summer, but during spring I lived about 50kilometers away from her (As I'm in different school than she).

Well, there were couple of times when I had to substitute some teachers at school in same city where this girl lives. I asked her if its okay to
sleep at hers place, so that I woudn't have to drive to work at morning. She always agreed to this.

During my stay, we watched movies, had some nice time together, did things together what first seemed that only couples would do.
There was this look in her eyes that told me, that she would like me.. more than in a "friend - way".

Time passes, we text a lot. One weekend (about 2 months from our first text episode) she came to my place, and we had a plan to go out with our
friends. When we arrived back at my place, we took some beverages, and after that I went to sleep.

The next thing is what scared me: Simply put, she came to my bed, kissed me and we had sex. She said that she had waited for this for a long time, and even got those birthcontrol pills for her... (Again, something that I'd categorize couples would do)

Time passes again, we text a lot, see each other at hers place, but do nothing like before, even kiss. This was the time when I thought that what happened at my place was totally because of her drinking a bit too much, and there's nothing more.

Few weeks ago, we started kissing goodbyes. I thought that this means that we're getting further with our relationship, I even slipped a note where I told her that I like her. I never heard her response to that.

Now, for the first time, I haven't recieved any text-messages from her for 48 hours. She isn't on facebook, either. It seems that she's totally ignoring me or something like that...

There's nothing to ask you from this, I only wanted to share this story to someone.. Got no friends who whould had the time and understanding for this.

Or yeah, I've got 1 question: What does she want? I'm totally frozen when it comes to finding a girl and starting dating etc...

And sorry for my bad english!

[KristenElaine]

I think you should just ask her what she wants. She could be busy and not responding because of that, or she could be driving some space in between you guys. I know that whan I like a guy, or am in a relationship, I usually respond when I see a text. Just be honest and upfront. And go from there. =)

[theron]

Thanks for the reply

I haven't confronted her in this matter yet, but I found out
that she is in a middle of school projects and exams.

Maybe this is the case why shes not that keen on contacting me

[Boisdevie]

If it was important she could contact you. It does not take a long time to write and send a text message. And do not apologise for your English - it is very good.

hyvä menestys minun kaveri

[KristenElaine]

When you really matter to someone, that person will always make time for you. No excuses, no lies, and no broken promises.

[theron]

Okay. I had a nice & long chat with this girl today...

I asked her, if she had any idea where this our "thing" is going.

It turns out that she has some issues when it comes to dating, relationships etc... That's mainly because of her ex, who was a total d*ckhead the whole time they were together (2 years).

And because of that, she's not able to have any relationships atm...

...But she said that this hasn't to be the end for us, she doesn't want to "break up" -- She's just uneasy with the idea of starting something serious right now.

Is there point on waiting for her? As far as I know, she broke up with her last boyfriend 7 months ago and she's hasn't had any boyfriends since then.

When it comes to me, I'm ready to go as far as possible... But whether it is worth it or not, thats the question.

[oldskool83]

peace her.

[theron]

I started a new thread about this on the Love advice - forum, but I'm eager to share my story here also.

Ok. When she stated that she's not ready for anything serious, I took a step back and left her alone. It did take about a week of NC, when she finally started spamming me @ facebook.
She talked the common things, how I've been etc etc, but I thought that there's no need to be in speaking terms with her.

Then she said that she's been regretting what she said to me before. She also mentioned, that both of us have had bad dates before, and "that's just life" -- finally, she asked if
we could watch where our thing is going, not rushing anywhere. <- This is where I admitted.

After this, we started seeing each other bit more, but I was (and still am) bit cautious... After all, it didn't take more than a week for her to change her mind; it wouldn't take much longer to change it again, would it?

While I've been with her, she seems much more nicer to me than before the "where-are-we" question.. We've kissed a lot, but there hasn't been any sex... It doesn't bother me though.

All I'm waiting for that we would make this official and start being as a boyfriend-girlfriend.

I've been less clingy with her, not spamming txt all the time. And I'm kinda dating another girl at the same time, but I guess she's not that into me.

Time will tell, I guess. Whatever the future holds, there's plenty of girls waiting

[IndiReloaded]

When you really matter to someone, that person will always make time for you. No excuses, no lies, and no broken promises.

Truth, right here^. If CEO and high powered professionals can find time for love, so can everyone else.