Where am I going wrong?

[flfv]

Ok, so first I will tell you a little info about myself. I am a 24 year old male, I am from the US but live in Russia right now and work as an English teacher. I speak Russian, not really well, but enough to go out on dates with girls. I am 5'9'' weigh about 165-170, work out a lot and am in good shape, looks wise I am about a 7 or 8. I have no problems getting dates with girls. I usually go out with at least 1 girl a week. I usually meet them online. The problem is, is that all the ones I am interested in seem to just lose interest in me. I can't quite figure out what I am doing wrong. I had the same problem in the US. I could meet girls and they seemed interested, but for some reason after 1 or 2 dates they just lose interest. Maybe I'm boring? Not trying to get physical with them fast enough and they just see me as a friend? I honestly have no clue and it is really frustrating. Obviously the girls have at least some interest in me or they would not agree to meet me. So ladies, please, help me out, what could I be doing that is making these girls lose interest?

[alwaystryin]

Can't say, don't know you.. but I can share a personal experience. Met a guy online, his pics where great, stylish, beautiful eyes, whatever. But when I met him in person he was shorter than he claimed, had bad posture and his clothes smelled like he lived in a dusty house. Just didn't present in person the way I expected. Maybe the profile isn't matching the person.

[iamaninnocentma]

Can't say, don't know you.. but I can share a personal experience. Met a guy online, his pics where great, stylish, beautiful eyes, whatever. But when I met him in person he was shorter than he claimed, had bad posture and his clothes smelled like he lived in a dusty house. Just didn't present in person the way I expected. Maybe the profile isn't matching the person.

thats some sense of smell you have there. the dust in my house is pretty much odourless.

[alwaystryin]

Wow, hardly the point. Though since your interest lies in the dust portion, I'll take a minute to humor you. Maybe musty would have been a better word. We went back to his place for a nightcap (despite the lack of physical attraction we had many similar interests which made for great conversation throughout the evening), and I stepped into a living room FULL of albums. Turns out he collects and sells/ trades them. I understood immediately when he explained that he gets them from anywhere and everywhere, including the garbage and estate clean-outs. A better word to use would have been archive. He smelled like a dusty, musty vinyl archive as did his entire house. I wasn't there for long. Though I think that would have been running on a bit about irrelevant details in my original reply, no?

[alwaystryin]

I do happen to have a great sense of smell by the way. Which in a love forum sense equates to anyone I spend time with not smelling like anything but good

[iamaninnocentma]

Wow, hardly the point. Though since your interest lies in the dust portion, I'll take a minute to humor you. Maybe musty would have been a better word. We went back to his place for a nightcap (despite the lack of physical attraction we had many similar interests which made for great conversation throughout the evening), and I stepped into a living room FULL of albums. Turns out he collects and sells/ trades them. I understood immediately when he explained that he gets them from anywhere and everywhere, including the garbage and estate clean-outs. A better word to use would have been archive. He smelled like a dusty, musty vinyl archive as did his entire house. I wasn't there for long. Though I think that would have been running on a bit about irrelevant details in my original reply, no?

jeez. i didnt ask for your life story. Posts like this might explain why you have to go on dates with dusty people. Its not all about you, you know. The op has a genuine problem and you manage to sidetrack the thread telling us about your obsessive compulsive ex bf. Ps im not sure what musty means.

[alwaystryin]

Ex bf? Can you read? This is a person I met online and went out with once. No one answered this post, and not knowing the OP personally who could possibly tell him what he's doing "wrong" as he asked. However I did give him an insight as to why a person could not call again after one date with someone they meet for the first time based on only an online profile. I believe the thread became sidetracked when YOU became selfish enough to comment on what YOUR dust doesn't smell like. I'm gonna go out on a limb here and say I doubt THAT helped the OP at all aside from him maybe deciding not to waste his time reading any of your replies. Pull your head out of your ass. Happy tryin'.

[iamaninnocentma]

omg. are you now saying the op smells "dusty", and thats why hes not getting his hole? Im not sure i care too much for the aggressive tone of your replys, but ill not bite , because im sure you are usually a nice person and are probably just on your monthly cycle. no hard feelings.

[alwaystryin]

Okay, get a dictionary and work on your reading skills. I summed up my point in the last sentence of my first reply. I've noticed your really hung up on women's menstrual cycles which is creepy. No hard feelings taken. OP, I apologize for wasting your thread talking to this.. person.

[iamaninnocentma]

yeah, tbf it is a little creepy. must try stop that. lol

[soambiguous]

hmmm...well coming from a 21 year old female's perspective maybe you should try being yourself. Be funny, smart, polite, and find common interests. Most importantly, be confident. Also, I don't know if you may be coming off as too into yourself I'm not saying you are, but make sure you're putting the spotlight on her. Make sure you're choosing the right settings for a first date. A small luncheon or coffee would be suffice.

[Angellic]

Have you tried asking any of them why they apparently lost interest? However, I'm sure there is nothing wrong with you, so don't get all paranoid. It might be that you come across as needy or something - who knows? It's impossible to speculate from what you have said. Keep dating and be confident at all times (not overly confident obviously!!). The right girl will come along soon enough.

[flfv]

Thank you to those who replied. So I just talked with a girl that I went out with about 6 months ago. She said that everything went fine except the ending of the date, and that was what ruined it. She said here in Russia that most girls expect a guy to offer to go home with them, just to make sure they get home safe and then they expect a call or a message to make sure they got home safe. I never offered to go home with girls because I thought they would think I was just trying to sleep with them, which is not the impression I wanted to give. Sometimes I will send a message asking if they got home, but not all the time. It never seemed to make a difference when I was in the US so I didn't even think about it. Plus I am always afraid of coming off as desperate or too needy. Or call or text them too often. That is what always seemed to ruin things for me back at home...

I asked her if I looked and acted like she was expecting and she said I did. She thought I would be a little taller but that's all. I do have my actual height on my profile, maybe I just seemed taller in my pictures...

So, I know I am screwing up at the end, and honestly a lot of times I am not sure how to end the date. Do I kiss her or not? On the lips or just on the cheek? Or just give her a hug? So my next question for you all is, assuming a date goes well, how do you think the good bye should be? What would the perfect and/or a good ending to a date? and what could a guy do that would ruin the date and make you cross them off as a potential boyfriend?

[smackie9]

Maybe not texting thm too much BUT women like to be desired, or feel that you find them irresitable, sexy.......You don't have to sleep with them right away, you can express your desire in more subtle ways. The build up of sexual tension is what wins.

[flfv]

Ok, two questions. Can you give me some examples of these subtle ways? and how do I build up sexual tension?