Am I too jealous/paranoid when it comes to my girlfriend?

[EpiKer]

It's gonna a long letter so please bear with me.

Me and my girlfriend are both 16 and we are together for 2 months now and this month we will be 3 months together. We love each other more than anything. We are very happy in our relationship and I could not ask for a more perfect girl than her. She feels the same way. Recently I told her that I believe that she is my soulmate and she believes that I am her soulmate too. But there's a problem... I think I have jealous issues.
My girlfriend has a lot of guy friends, and when I say a lot, I mean A LOT. She has like 4 female friends and all of the others are guy friends. Now the problem with this girl is that she's really friendly. Why is that a problem? Because it's really easy falling in love with her and when she's with someone he gets a message that she's flirting with him but she doesn't do that on purpose, it just happens because of the vibes she sent's. Normally, I don't have a problem that she has a lot of guy friends... But I'll give you a few example why now I do have:
1. There's this really good guy friend of hers. One time at school he came up to her and they started hugging. And not only that they were hugging, they were also giggling and moving side to side while hugging like they were slow dancing and they did that for like 30 seconds! And I was there just watching them.

2. Before we were boyfriend and girlfriend, she liked my best friend and he liked her too. Nothing happened between them because they didn't do anything to be together, but I became her boyfriend. And even though they are only good friends now and they have no feelings for each other, I still get worried whenever they are alone together... I fear that something will suddenly happen between them.

3. Right now she's on a vacation for 3 weeks in USA, Orlando. When we talk on Skype she tells me that there 5 boys at around the same age as ours at her hotel. She says they are really hot and they even tried hitting on her. Of course she told them that she has a boyfriend but still. She tells me that she hugs them when she goes or to say hi. You get the picture.

4. Remember that really good friend of her on reason 1? Well... She posted a status on Facebook a few days before she went on her vacation that she is going on a vacation in the USA. He wrote on her status "Enjoy!" and she wrote him "Thanks prince!" (that's not a nickname. That's like saying baby in our language). And I wrote her "enjoy sweetie!" she only liked my comment. Also, she posted a picture of her in the USA and that same guy wrote "Wow I wanna go there! I'm on my way to you " and she wrote him "Waiting!!". Now I don't really mind that reason but my sister came to me and told me that what she's doing is wrong...

And there it goes... Should I be worried and jealous? I talked to her once about it but she got upset... She is always telling me that I am the only one that she's thinking about and that she loves me more than anything.... Hell, she told me that I am her soulmate! She keeps reminding me that they are just friends and they are not me and that I am perfect for her... I believe her... But I just can't get rid of that jealousy feeling and being paranoid.
And no, she is not a slut or acting slutty. She's actually one of the nicest girl I have ever met and she hates all those high school sluts. She's smart, funny, nice, caring, loving, basically perfect for me.

So should I be worried and jealous? Is it normal? What should I do?

Oh, I also forgot to say that I am scared to talk to her about it. Because last time I talked to her about something similar to that we had an argument.. She kinda gets upset because she thinks that I can't trust her. She's really sensitive and I don't wanna ruin our relationship because of a fight we had... So that's why I'm scared talking to her about stuff like that.

And she is not one of those girls that like to party and drink alcohol. My girlfriend is not like that! She hates parties and she hates alcohol. She's not some kind of a "girl next door" she like "the nice girl". She's really close to her parents and family and she comes from a really nice and caring family. And also she would like to have sex only after marriage. So NO, she is not your typical girl like almost 90% of the girls in this world today.
And about the soulmate thing... Meeting your soulmate doesn't have to be at an old age! Love can be found at any age. For example, her parents and my mothers friends met at the age of 15 and now they are married with kids.


I am truly sorry for the long post!

P.S: Sorry for any grammar mistakes. I am not American.

[Bewsh]

If she tells you she loves you and you are her soulmate, and she tells you they are just friends, I'd say just listen and respect that no matter how jealous you get.

I know exactly how you feel with the jealousy, it's horrible isn't it, you think something bad will happen, right? Well my best advice to you would be to snap out of it and KNOW that she will be faithful to you. And please, do take that advice on board and use it otherwise you'll end up like me. I spent the last month in my house with a sickness, my girlfriend was out with her friends and jealousy got the better of me. After more times she was going out, horrible thoughts kept creeping in, ended up asking her if she had feelings for someone else because it got that bad. Obviously that really insulted her and made me look like I had trust issues.

2 weeks on from that and i'm now sitting here hurting because i've just lost the love of my life. I'd go through all the jealousy x20 again just so I could act differently and still have her in my life.

Learn to listen to what your girlfriend says, trust her, respect she still has a life outside of you and is entitled to have a laugh. I didn't for 2 weeks, now i'm single. Don't make my mistake

All the best.

[nocluewhattodo]

Im sorry but yes you are being both paranoid and jelous, you are only 16 and have only been together 2 months. Your jelousy will only serve to push her away. I dont mean to be patronising but it is very rare anyone meets their husband or wife at 16 and knows after only 2 months. Most teenagers will have many relationships before they settle down and if you continue with your behaviour you will get your girlfriend to her next one faster than you think

[berg101]

Without sounding harsh you seriously need to get a grip - every time you start to get jealous you'll push her away without even knowing it. The way I see things is what's the point in spending your time being paranoid and getting jealous about who your girlfriend talks to, at the end of the day you don't own her and she is entitled to talk to anyone she wants - besides if she did cheat on you then surely that proves she isn't the one for you and your better off rid?! The ironic thing is that the more you fret about this and talk to her about it the more likely she is that she'd cheat on you. There is no point worrying about something that you have absolutely NO control over.

I think you're slightly too wrapped up in this relationship, it sounds massively serious for someone only 16 and you've only been together for 2 months. I'd recommend going out a bit more and meeting up with friends and different girls - not to get with, but just to have contact with other girls, that'll massively ease your jealousy. Jealousy usually stems from the fact that a person is worried about losing someone and that they won't be able to cope without them - but you will be absolutely fine, there are so many girls out there - the world is your oyster.

Last night I was out with some friends and my girlfriend who I've been with for just under 3 months asked me if I'd pick her up from this club and stay at hers, I said yes and when I got there she was outside with her friend and they were chatting to some guys, she waved at me and I just pulled over and waited for her to come across - I didn't get bothered by it, I didn't start questioning her about who the guys were and what not because at the end of the day I trust her - if I'd pulled up there and seen her getting with someone I'd have simply got out the car, walked over, smacked the guy and then that would have been it, me and her would be through - sure I'd be devastated for a couple of days but then I'd just go out and find some other girl.

Don't invest so much into a relationship at your age, especially when you're not even having sex yet (not that that matters at the minute - but trust me it will begin to be important).

I don't mean to come across as harsh but believe me if you keep going down this road you'll sabotage your relationship and any future relationships you have. Talk to more girls - I promise you that will make a huge difference - and remember, just because you speak to girls doesn't mean your cheating on your girlfriend.

[cheekxs]

You should worry about your school!

To make it in life kid!