Had a great date - now what?

[Mark1]

Hi all,

I went on a date with a girl from the web on Friday night

We went to a fancy burger place, then walked around the river front holding hands

10 minutes in, she said it was the best date she's had in a long time

We joked about all the things you aren't supposed to talk about on the first date - sex, ex's and politics

We stopped at a couple of bars and she had a couple of drinks, which caused her to cozy up to me A LOT

Walked her home, and made out at her front door at about 11pm

She texts me at 2am saying "I had a lot of fun tonight. I'd love to see you again"

So at this point I'm pretty pumped. She was funny, smart (masters degree) and really laid back.

Sunday, I text her telling her what days are good for me, and she replies "hey, i got your text. this week is crazy busy for me, but I can meet Saturday?" to which I said that was fine.

------

Fastforward to Tuesday

I texted her just to keep contact, and I'm not sure if it went well.

Me: (Referencing something we talked about on the date)

Her: "Ah, of course"

Me: "Hows your week? I have some ideas for Sat."

Her: "My week is good, but I forgot Im going to be in [far away city] this weekend."

Me: "Next week then?"

Her: "Sure"

Me: "Sweet. Have a fun trip!"

Her: "Thanks! "



Don't think it wen't well. She didn't seem too interested like she was before. Any thoughts? I know she said she isn't the type of girl who needs to be in constant contact with the guy she is seeing, and obviously we aren't exclusive, but I was just hoping for more on her end. I was thinking of texting her next on Sat asking how her trip is.

[Hamburglar0]

I've had this same sort of experience dozens of times. First of all, keep in mind that you could be reading too much into this latest texting exchange... definitely possible she just genuinely is busy and can't meet up until next weekend.

That said, I think it's always best to keep the conversation light. When you contact her next, don't go straight into the "hey, how was your trip, wanna meet up on Sat?"... instead, make some sort of inside joke, like: "Haha, remember that guy we saw last Friday carrying that tiny dog in his jacket? Saw him again today at Starbucks wearing a kilt." (this is obviously just an example, you'll want to think of something relevant but still amusing). The goal of this is to just lighten things up.. you don't want to seem over-eager or scare her away. Many women need "the thrill of the chase" and they'll lose interest if it seems too easy. You want her to think that you have other options... other dates waiting... that dating in general is just an everyday affair to you.

Lastly, there's always the possibility that she's found someone else or rekindled an old relationship in the interim. Hopefully not, but it's always a possibility.

Good luck!

[Mark1]

Thanks much!

[surfhb]

I dont see any problem here. She said she was busy....contact her next Tuesday to make plans for Sat. If she says she cant' again then quit contacting her.

[Cerby]

Agreed with surf. But I don't agree with your plan to "text to keep contact". That's just a way of saying "I'm closet clingy and have you in my sights". Keep busy until next Tuesday or Wednesday, then CALL her and confirm the date. Until then just leave it or wait for her to contact you. She obviously had fun on her date with you, so if it goes sour, it will be because of a change of heart on her end. Don't risk it by smothering her.

[Angellic]

Yes, don't keep texting her randomly. She knows you like her, so just contact her a few days before you'd like to see her again and see what her response is. If she blows you out again, she isn't interested and the great date you shared was just a fluke. Nothing you did wrong, btw, just the way it goes.