Back in contact with my ex... need advice

[swimmer4life]

So i recently caved in and texted my ex after almost 10 months of no contact. Things surprisingly went well and we have agreed to become friends. The only thing is that she is newly dating someone, and as far as i know its a long distance relationship. I was planning on trying to stay in contact with her during the relationship and hopefully become close again, and who knows what may happen between us if or when they break up. So my main question is this a good idea? Im hoping she will warm up to me over time and think about the possibility of us getting back together, especially if they break up. I mean its better than just sitting around and doing nothing right? Advice please...

[searock]

This is really not a good idea. Why would you do that to yourself? Stop lying to the both of you: you don't want to be *friends* with her. You want to get close again so that some day she'll get back together with you.

Instead of sitting around and doing nothing, start meeting new people and focus on other girls.

[brheartedgirl]

If you really love her then try to win her attention back Keep in touch with her , noone knows . both of you will be together soon.

[Cerulean.]

I agree with searock. If she still had feelings for you, she would have contacted you. You have been friendzoned, now. "Been there, done that" kind of thing. I stopped talking to one of my exes after we broke up. A few months later, he contacted me. We became friends again and that's where it's stayed. I've not once thought "Oh, should I get back together with him?" but I did think "Bonus! We're friends."

[brheartedgirl]

There are certain possibilities guys

[swimmer4life]

Im not sitting around doing nothing. Ive had relationships since our breakup, and i am talking to another girl at the moment. My basic thought process was to get in contact with her, keep in touch, stay friends, and if were ever both single again i could make a move on her. She's even told me she has thought about texting me at times but was hesitant, much like i was.

It honestly just seems like i can make up more ground with being friends than no contact.

[brheartedgirl]

That was exactly my point too ..

[swimmer4life]

Thank you brheartedgirl! Im glad u see it my way haha

[brheartedgirl]

ofcourse we are both the same human LOL .

[cathy22]

I would be, "a friend", and leave it at that. If things change in the future, well,...

In the meantime get out and meet people. Waiting for someone, (especially if they'll with somebody), is a shot in the dark.

[swimmer4life]

Yeah, thats pretty much what I'm doing

[kpreen]

Why does ex's always have the tendency to get back? I think you should move on and meet other people with new experience

[swimmer4life]

Well if the circumstances are right, and both people have strong feelings for eachother and want to get back together than why not...

[Melina]

swimmer4life, if you love her and really believe there may be a future for you with this girl, if it's always going to be "what if" then why not be around... as long as it doesn't hurt you in the process.

I hung around while an ex of mine figured out what he did with his life and saw a couple of other women, I didn't see much of him but got on with my own life meantime. It was always in the back of my mind though that noone could ever compare to him and we are now trying again, I like to think I just realised a bit faster than he did that this was worth another shot, time will tell.

Good luck to you and congrats on your honesty about your feelings, takes guts to do that

[swimmer4life]

Yes i definitely do believe there is a possible future for us. I will live my life and she will live hers. And if we stay in contact, when the time is right, hopefully there will be a possibility for us to be together again.

I'm happy to hear things have come together with you and your ex and are now trying things again, i hope to have the same fortune as you.

Thanks you for your advice and I wish you all the best!