Feeling down and out - I think she cheated.

[ugggh]

Hey guys, I'm new here and could really use some advice. I'm kind of at my wits end here. I'm feeling so depressed right now. I left my job and moved to a different state, chucking away my entire life, for a girl. We dated for a year with some distance before making this step and everything was always great. We were in love during our visits and life felt perfect the day I moved here. I've been here about 6 months now and everything has gone downhill.

She hangs out with her ex and works on cars with him sometimes and last night she was gone all night. I confronted her and she said that they made out on the couch and fell asleep together, but didn't have sex. She also said that she's sorry. Obviously they did have sex. I'm not stupid. She denies it though. So we had a big fight and she left and says that she'll be back Sunday, says she needs us to take a break and that she needs space. Tried to assure me that she won't be doing anything with her ex while she's gone and that she is cutting contact with him, but I don't believe that. ****. I'm so sad. I love her a lot, but I feel like I should probably just leave her. She's out sleeping with him and I know it. I feel like I should just end it all, but I gave up my entire life up for her. She said that she wanted a family and kids with me. What should I do? I feel so lost.

Thanks for your time guys.

[smuff10]

Run bro, run. Go back to your home state if you are not leaving anything else behind but her. Admit your mistake of leaving to yourself your family and friends. Take your life back, leave the girl. She is not worth it.

[Cerulean.]

Wow. SHE needs space and time to think about things? Please leave her, now. Let her come back and see you are far gone and done with this. Like smuff said, go back to your home state and get your life back together. I know you're hurting bad right now, and your heart is not agreeing with your head because of all the memories and great times re-playing in your mind... you aren't alone. I'm sure everyone on this forum has been there in some way or another. That heavy feeling of heartbreak and loss sucks, but you will be making a mistake and lowering your standards if you try and stay with her. A person who loves you with all their heart would never cheat on you. It's just going to be a long road of hurt and distrust in her if you try and mend things. You won't be happy. Do yourself a favor and get out now. You will thank yourself in the long run.

[Illusional]

the reason that she took a break from you is to have sex with that guy. i mean, it's not cheating if you two aren't technically in a relationship anymore right?

raverboy

[smackie9]

Ya things were ideal when it was long distance because that gave the relationship mystery, excitement and buildup from being apart. Things were intense, and a lot of people think this is the person I want to be with forever at this stage of a LDR. Reality hits home when you spend your time with each other 24/7. That thrill and intensity dies off, things are not what she had thought they would be, and you are not so desirable. She realized she made a huge mistake and what the hell can she do now? She made you pack all your sh it up, left everything behind....that's a lot of pressure for her to take. So what happens? She starts to run away, escape, remove herself from the situation and goes back to what she was comfortable with....her ex. Sorry things didn't work out. Next time date locally....there is no vagina out there that can be worth this much bull sh it......it's not worth this much risk. If you do find yourself relocating (again) for someone, DO NOT MOVE IN WITH THEM! Get your own place and ease into each other's lives.


***You can't possibly get to know someone until you are with them in their own environment...friends, family, etc.

[love_architect]

Hey guys, I'm new here and could really use some advice. I'm kind of at my wits end here. I'm feeling so depressed right now. I left my job and moved to a different state, chucking away my entire life, for a girl. We dated for a year with some distance before making this step and everything was always great. We were in love during our visits and life felt perfect the day I moved here. I've been here about 6 months now and everything has gone downhill.

She hangs out with her ex and works on cars with him sometimes and last night she was gone all night. I confronted her and she said that they made out on the couch and fell asleep together, but didn't have sex. She also said that she's sorry. Obviously they did have sex. I'm not stupid. She denies it though. So we had a big fight and she left and says that she'll be back Sunday, says she needs us to take a break and that she needs space. Tried to assure me that she won't be doing anything with her ex while she's gone and that she is cutting contact with him, but I don't believe that. ****. I'm so sad. I love her a lot, but I feel like I should probably just leave her. She's out sleeping with him and I know it. I feel like I should just end it all, but I gave up my entire life up for her. She said that she wanted a family and kids with me. What should I do? I feel so lost.

Thanks for your time guys.

hey, personally I would turn the page, been together is a commitment, if she can't respect it, she dont deserve, it's looks like she isnt (yet ) aware of what a couple is ... so next ..!

[haxan]

Reality didn't live up to the fantasy. Most relationships burn out after a few months, this one is no different. The problem is you rolled the dice and gave up a lot to try and make it happen. It's obvious it's not going to work out, you just have to decide what to do for yourself. Start a new life on your own there, or go back to where you came from.

A hard lesson learned, but you can recover.

[IndiReloaded]

Kudos to you on taking a chance. It didn't work out, life goes on as Smackie and Haxan said.

Now is the time to really pay attention to the signs you had about her (an ex she was close to, for starters). Learn from this, all you can do.

[AdminOnline]

***You can't possibly get to know someone until you are with them in their own environment...friends, family, etc.

this is one ultimate test!!