Could we work this time?

[pepper]

Hi,

I am 25 years old now. when I started dating this man I was 17. We dated for 3 yrs on and off again and he would constantly break up with me. He told me it was because of his insecurities. He would get back with me because he couldn't be with the other girl. He dumped me for good 3 yrs later and dated another girl for a year and a half. after that we were pretty much just friends qwith benefits. He told me that sometimes sex is just sex. I would think it meant more. When we were at bars with our mutual friends I would flip out when other girls would hit on him. We weren't together but I still had feelings for him. Our friends are always happy when we aren't in each others lives. A year a half ago we stopped talking because he said he would never want to be with me. We met at a party 2 months ago and he told me he was sorry for how he treated me. He said he had insecurities and wanted to take things slowly with me to see if our relationship could work without his insecurities. Our friends don't think we're right for each other but we are drawn to each other. It has been 2 months and we're still not offical yet. Could this work this time around? Can people really change?

[Cerby]

It might work, but it probably won't. People don't change as much as they do grow up. 17 and 25 are a long ways apart for sure.

Do you have faith in it? Personally it sounds pretty grim to me.

[pepper]

We dated for 3 years until we were 20. Then from 22-24 we were just fooling around. He told me sex was just sex...a way to pleasure each other. It was messy for 2-3 years. I blocked and deleted him after he told me he wanted to go out with someone from school and not me. Then we ran into each other and now he tells me he is going to counselling and wants to see if our relationship would work without the insecurities. He wants to take things slowly.

[IndiReloaded]

Sounds like you only want us to post what you want to hear. Is that true?

Short answer: no, its not going to work. Its him, don't take it personally and don't try to fix it, you can't.

He sounds like far too much work for the beginning of a relationship. Counselling? Forget it. Don't try to fix this broken puppy, just move on to someone who really digs you from the beginning without drama. Relationships are hard enough work w/o a beginning like this.

[danielwlj]

just giv up on him... he might doing the same in the future