Been with my g/f 5 years, but like another girl

[Fishin10]

Alright ladies and gents, I've come upon an issue and don't how or what to do.. I'm 22 years old..

I've been with my girlfriend for 5 years. We have a good time together, I love her and she's the only girl I've ever really been with. Recently at work I started talking to another girl just about everything, friends, life, everything. And as time has passed the last month or two I've grown to like her and I know that she likes me as well. My problem is that I would like to go out with the girl at work and see how it goes, I really like her a lot. However, I feel bad telling any of this to my girlfriend.. She always tells me she loves me and she would be lost without me and stuff like that.

I'm seeking any advice on what to do here considering I really do like the girl from work a lot and I do want to give her a shot, but I don't want to break my girlfriends heart by breaking up with her.. I don't know what to do..

[VincenzoG91]

You don't love your girlfriend, not really. If you, you wouldn't be getting excited about this new girl. So the right thing to do is to break up with your girlfriend. It isn't fair for her to be in a relationship with a guy who doesn't love her anymore. Do it now, before you get involved with the new girl, or get to used to feeling bad about the whole situation.

For what it's worth, dating co-workers is a dumb idea. A great relationship is worth more than just about any job, but you don't know yet if things will work out with the new girl. If things don't work out, it's going to get really awkward at work, and you might get in some trouble, depending on the company policy about dating co-workers.

[smackie9]

This usually happens when you jump into a committed relationship too young or it being your first......the need to experience others down the road. What you are feeling is quite normal. It's only fair to break up with her, we all have done it and have gone through it.

As for co-worker attraction.....that is quite normal too. It is easily blown off as an infatuation if you recognize it as such.....and there are risks to consider. Being with someone for 5 years, your expectations of the next GF may be a let down. Then you find yourself f ucked because your ex can't forgive you so you are left alone and disappointed.

If you feel you need change, then you must takes risks to have it. You will lose and hurt others when you take risks, but it's part of the cost to get what you want.

[Syril]

I gotta say that I have the same opinion as the people before me. If you started to like this girl it's already the end of the relationship with your girlfriend. If you are more interested in other girls than her than just let her go. It's much more fair with her than just keeping her around to be "nice".

[Boisdevie]

YOu won't break her heart. She will survive. So end it and you can both move on.

[misserin]

Im in the same situation as you, however I am the 'girl at work'.
My guy is the same, in a relationship for 5 years but feeling stuck as GF says she loves him all the time and he wants to be nice. He talked to me about everything and we both realised we loved each other.

Ill say the same to you as I said to him. If you are looking for other people your relationship probably isnt working anyway. The fairest thing to do is either to explain this to your GF and see if you can find out the reason you arent happy, or leave her to try it with this other girl. It may be that your new relationship with the girl at work finishes quickly for whatever reason, but at least you gave it a shot and wont regret not trying it. On the flip side at least if you try to work things out with GF you can start to solve your problems.

Dont get anymore involved with the girl while in your relationship. If you think shes worth it, take the leap.

[surfhb]

I could say I'm interested in lots of women id want to date but it take a certain amount maturity to commit. Doesn't sound like you are up for the task at this point. You're only 22 so you're still just a "kid" in the grand scheme of things.

[smackie9]

The obvious next step when in a long term relationship is engagement/marriage. If you are not ready for it and you are wondering whatelse is out there, then you are not with the right person anyways.

[Maple1714]

Break up with your GF. It's going to suck for her but you have to be selfish in relationships. You have to make yourself happy first. I've been there...I broke my first boyfriends heart, but he moved on. Maybe your current GF wants out too? You are only 22...you gotta see what else is out there! Don't jump into another relationship with your co-worker right away though. Take it slow. You are used to being in a relationship so it will be hard to not jump right into another...just don't.

[Justincredible]

The better question is how you can break up with your girlfriend with out really really hurting her. It's may not be possible, but it's worth a shot.

[smackie9]

NOT! break ups suck....so suck it up, it's gonna hurt.

[Illusional]

you're young and you still got time to realize that the grass on the other side isn't always greener. and if you're already liking another girl, you don't give a shit about your gf so end it.


raverboy

[cheekxs]

you can seek advice all overthe world but if you dont do something with it you can better not ask for.

and you dont love her. you where young and kept the relationship till now. and now you want to know other girls.

but i wonder if after a couple of months again you like another girl. are you going to jump from girl to girl like a male slut?

anyway, i think you have to honest with your gf.
and have respect for her by break up with her in a nice way before you even go out with that girl.
dont cheat and let her find out by her own.

just be honest and get lost!

And way do you go to work to fall in love? there are people that really need a job and that really want to work! you know......!!!?!!

[DearWendy]

Dude, You're only 22. You've been with your girlfriend since you were 17. Go experience what dating is like as an adult. Have some fun. Sow your oats. You're way too young to settle down with one person.