Once a cheat always a cheat??

[Loutoo]

I found out that my new partner cheated on his ex wife with 4 other women. He not only treated his wife badly but also treated these other woman badly. Including convincing one he would leave his wife and move to be with her to another city - so she moves and sets up house and then he stays with his wife.
There is no evidence he has cheated on me but it still concerns me, the last and worst event of this infidelity was 3 years ago that I am aware of. We have been seeing each other for just over a year. WHAT DO I DO? Should I get out now?? Please offer some advice it is most upsetting to know he is capable of this kind of act.

[sam13]

you answered your own question

he will end up treating you badly and cheat

[AdminOnline]

"A Leopard Never Change It's Spots" ...

[lovemuffin]

How long have you been with him?

[Wakeup]

We have been seeing each other for just over a year. WHAT DO I DO? Should I get out now?? Please offer some advice it is most upsetting to know he is capable of this kind of act.

Repeated for your reading pleasure.

My question is, how did you find all this out? .. and .. was he actually single when you met him?
As for the one that he convinced he'd leave his wife for.. she's a bloody idiot and shouldn't have been with a married guy to begin with. Did the others know he was married and went to bed with him anyway as well?

[AdminOnline]

Thread merged.
TS, please keep to same topic to a thread only.
Thanks alot.

[Ange Barnes]

People can change and perhaps he may feel differently about you. I am not sure I would wait around to find out though... perhaps give this one a miss!

[SheffieldLad]

People can change and perhaps he may feel differently about you. I am not sure I would wait around to find out though... perhaps give this one a miss!

Agreed. Ditch him and save yourself the heartache.

[Loutoo]

I asked him if he had even been unfaithful and he told me. It took a good couple of hour to get all the stories out of him but he confessed. Yes, they all knew he was married. It is all so sordid.

Repeated for your reading pleasure.

My question is, how did you find all this out? .. and .. was he actually single when you met him?
As for the one that he convinced he'd leave his wife for.. she's a bloody idiot and shouldn't have been with a married guy to begin with. Did the others know he was married and went to bed with him anyway as well?

[Loutoo]

Just over a year

How long have you been with him?

[Loutoo]

He was sleeping with someone but was not in a relationship with her - it was a friends with benefit arrangement.


was he actually single when you met him?

[Boisdevie]

What really matters I suppose is how he treats you. Can people change? I think so. I used to be a borderline alcoholic. I don't drink any more so I"ve changed. Perhaps he has.

[cheekxs]

What do you do? RUN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! like Forest Gumb!

cAUSE i think this dude is the same or worse. And you will be one more victim of him!

If you told me he cheated with 1 i would say okay, its bad, but keep get to know him.

But if you tell me he cheated with 4 and treat them bad, i would say RUN>
now that your feelings are not that strong for him.

Cause looking at the amount(that you know off) its something normal for him to deal with woman
that way. So you are noting special!

People can change. But often its when something big happen in their life's.
Or touched them so hard that they realized they need to change.

But in your case i dont think any of that happen.
And you finding out about his past, its a warning to you.
So dont act surprised when he do the same to you! Cause you knew it!

I would say dont date him. But if you still want to gamble with your heart, just
keep him as a friend for a long time. \Till
you really get to know who and what he really is and so you can see if its
something different. (even thou i doubt it!).

Cause after 1 year you know that he did all of that. so you dont know him and did not
take time for that eater. so you will find lot more surprises.

[cheekxs]

I it doesn't matter if they all knew he was married!

The one that really knew that he was married was himself!

So that's the problem!

[Happy]

Honestly, I think you should give him a shot. FIRSTLY because he was honest with you! That takes balls, honey. The fact that he gave you details as well? That says something if you ask me. SECONDLY because he's clearly shown you in the YEAR you've been together that he will stay faithful to you and that he loves you. THIRDLY because people do change! My mother cheated on my father over four times, but has stayed completely and utterly faithful to her current husband for years. HOWEVER don't be stupid. Let him know of your insecurity and let him know that he needs to PROVE his faith to you over time. Don't just jump head first into it, be prepared to leave if necessary.