How long should I maintain the "No contact" rule?

[TheDude8]

Okay, so here's the story.

I was dating a girl for about a year and a half and I fell madly in love with her. We were doing fine, only ever had one real argument which almost led to a break up, but we managed to get over that. In general, I thought we really loved each other. In the last few months though things started to get a little more and more gloomy as it was clear that she was going to move abroad to study in the end of August.


Back at the end of July I slipped into a bit of a depression/anxiety thing which turned me into a complete miserable wreck who did nothing but sleep all day and not eat anything. I guess I was sort of getting that feeling that I was about to lose something (as it happened about a month later). Anyway, I snapped out of it.

So the last few days we had together were kinda "plagued" with uncertainty. I obviously wanted to continue my relationship with this girl, because I truly cherished her, respected her, loved her and wanted to at least give this long-distance relationship thing a chance. I made my intentions and desires clear because I thought we had a good thing going on, a good, real connection, but she kinda started beating around the bush, not really giving me a proper indication as to "where do we go now".

At the end of August she went abroad and we didn't really realize we hadn't made things clear, we made no real decision about anything, just decided we'd go with the flow.

Two weeks after she left I found out she had kissed some guy at a party. Afterwards she finally spoke up about how she feels "so safe, comfortable and secure with me and that that shouldn't be the core value of a relationship for people our age (19)", also said she was feeling "suffocated" and whatnot. All her words, not mine. I was really hurt, disappointed and surprised in a bad way, because I thought this girl was different (ha, don't we all) and decided it'd be best if I discontinued any form of contact from then on, as much as she insisted on "still being there for each other and emotionally supporting each other" but I was having none of it. Things did not really end on a good note either, as I was bitter. I deleted her from my Facebook and so on, told her I needed at least a bit of time to myself because the pain was too much, got rid of everything she had ever given me (well, almost) and moved to England to start a new life. I was going to anyway.

This happened more than a month and a half ago. Now, I'm wondering... how long should I wait until I contact her? Yeah, I know I should probably let the dumpee contact first so that I can maintain my pride and all that, but I'm pretty sure she won't take up the initiative to contact me first, because she is shy, faint-hearted and is always afraid to make the first step in anything.

So how long should I wait until I, say, add her on skype again? And what kind of approach should I apply if I do re-initiate any form of communication? I kinda assume she's with someone else now although I haven't asked anyone...

The weird thing is, she 'liked' a few pictures of mine that other people uploaded which she has access to since our breakup, and she also keeps pictures of me/us on her Facebook profile, as few as they are, she hasn't deleted them(yet?). Isn't that a bit... strange?

[iamaninnocentma]

Only thing that comes from england are steers and queers, and i dont see no horns boy. Drop and give me 20.

[smackie9]

Dude it's over, don't contact her again and start banging other chicks...holy f uck there is so much pussy out there, stop wasting your time on her....you are 19 for heaven sakes, plenty of time to land yourself into another boring relationship......enjoy your freedom man.

[Boisdevie]

Dude it's over, don't contact her again and start banging other chicks...holy f uck there is so much pussy out there, stop wasting your time on her....you are 19 for heaven sakes, plenty of time to land yourself into another boring relationship......enjoy your freedom man.

Smackie, as ever you're completely wrong. In terms of the No Contact Rule, which we all know works fantastically well, the rule is that the time to break the No Contact period is based on a complex mathematical equation involving the ages of the two people involved, how long the relationship has been running, her phone number and his inside leg measurement. Given all these factors I'd suggest breaking the no contact period after, oh, 26.3777 years. Sorry but without all those essential numbers it's hard to be more precise than this. OH, but then if he's a Taurean and she's an Aries then those calculations might not be valid after all.

[lylufy]

You wonder the suitable time to contact to her! You still love her and want to be with her, forgive to her !
Now, you must consider 2 things when you contact to her: How to keep your price but keep her is yours too.
So the time shouldn't be too quick also slow.
I think 3 month is the essential time to both of you aware your problem and find the solution for yourself.
But you should watch for her, guess her thoughts and feelings and intensions. Then you will treat to her depend on both of your intensions.
Hope you can keep your true love !

[xanitus]

Smackie, as ever you're completely wrong. In terms of the No Contact Rule, which we all know works fantastically well, the rule is that the time to break the No Contact period is based on a complex mathematical equation involving the ages of the two people involved, how long the relationship has been running, her phone number and his inside leg measurement. Given all these factors I'd suggest breaking the no contact period after, oh, 26.3777 years. Sorry but without all those essential numbers it's hard to be more precise than this. OH, but then if he's a Taurean and she's an Aries then those calculations might not be valid after all.

lmfao funniest post ive read on here