Marriage/kids VS single life/fooling around

[Vic2012]

I'm going crazy trying to decide between marrying my long-term gf or going solo and playing the field.

I consider my girlfriend a rare find. Her maturity, maternity, love, kindness, honesty, commitment, loyalty, and humility are unparalleled. She's pretty, fun, outgoing, and SANE lol. She's super low maintenance and very caring. We have great personal and sexual chemistry. We agree on almost all life fundamentals.

There are a few negative things I obsess about as well. First, although she's educated and has a good job, she's less educated than I am and will make less $$$ guaranteed. We're the same age, which means I won't have a young body to look at in my older days (nor would she I guess but women don't seem to care about looks/age as much). She was married once before but her ex-husband cheated on her. She's beautiful and has a nice body but she doesn't have the perfect body of some of the girls I see around and that makes me think if I can do better.

The biggest thing, though, that's keeping me from committing is the fear of losing my single life. I made a huge error earlier in my life and stayed in an unhappy 9-year relationship that took my most of my younger years. I am now 30 and have only slept with 4 girls during my entire life! Because of this, I have developed a tremendous insecurity that has destroyed my male ego! What makes it worst, is that I know I can easily play the field (good job, big future income potential, fit, decent looking, fun) but I'll be committed to one woman forever should I marry her. I got a taste of the single life when I came out of my 0-year relationship and was fooling around with 4 decent girls for a few months (my gf being one of them).

I don't want to stay with my gf any longer if I don't plan on proposing to her in the immediate future. We've been together for 4 years and I knew a very long time ago she would make a perfect wife. I love her very much but lust is a powerful force! I feel that if I commit to her, my male sexual ego will be destroyed forever. But if i walk to fulfill my sexual fantasies, I will lose a best friend and an amazing life partner.

Any comments? Thanks!

[Boisdevie]

Any comments?

You seem incredibly had to please. Back here on planet earth most of us are with partners who might earn less or more than us. There might be other people out there who are physically more 'perfect'.
You can easily play the field? You egotistical tosser. Your girlfriend deserves better than you.

[surfhb]

I'm going crazy trying to decide between marrying my long-term gf or going solo and playing the field.

I consider my girlfriend a rare find. Her maturity, maternity, love, kindness, honesty, commitment, loyalty, and humility are unparalleled. She's pretty, fun, outgoing, and SANE lol. She's super low maintenance and very caring. We have great personal and sexual chemistry. We agree on almost all life fundamentals.

There are a few negative things I obsess about as well. First, although she's educated and has a good job, she's less educated than I am and will make less $$$ guaranteed. We're the same age, which means I won't have a young body to look at in my older days (nor would she I guess but women don't seem to care about looks/age as much). She was married once before but her ex-husband cheated on her. She's beautiful and has a nice body but she doesn't have the perfect body of some of the girls I see around and that makes me think if I can do better.

The biggest thing, though, that's keeping me from committing is the fear of losing my single life. I made a huge error earlier in my life and stayed in an unhappy 9-year relationship that took my most of my younger years. I am now 30 and have only slept with 4 girls during my entire life! Because of this, I have developed a tremendous insecurity that has destroyed my male ego! What makes it worst, is that I know I can easily play the field (good job, big future income potential, fit, decent looking, fun) but I'll be committed to one woman forever should I marry her. I got a taste of the single life when I came out of my 0-year relationship and was fooling around with 4 decent girls for a few months (my gf being one of them).

I don't want to stay with my gf any longer if I don't plan on proposing to her in the immediate future. We've been together for 4 years and I knew a very long time ago she would make a perfect wife. I love her very much but lust is a powerful force! I feel that if I commit to her, my male sexual ego will be destroyed forever. But if i walk to fulfill my sexual fantasies, I will lose a best friend and an amazing life partner.

Any comments? Thanks!

You sound like a complete Dick. Find another girl if you think you can do better

[Gargul]

Do your girl a favor and show her this thread. Then it'll sort itself out.

[Ladybuggg]

U want comments about whay?and I think u r not a men jet but a boy. A men dont talk like a teen.and u dont love this girl.cause u r to busy with the amount of money she makes and u make and how wrong her body is. If u can say all of that about her I think u dont even like her.so u most breal up with her so she can get a men. Cause I think u r a real futured cheater.cause your goal is to mess around.so u must be single and not wasting peoples time in a relationship. Being a men starts with being honest to your gf.

[steviej]

I'll tell you exactly what'll happen - if you walk you'll attempt to play the field, realise the fantasy in your head is nothing like reality and it won't be long before it dawns on you just what you threw away.

You'll beg and cry for her back but she's now seen your true colours and won't fall for it.

You'll be angry and miserable for a very long time, eventually settling for someone not even half as good as your ex.

[sadie_genie]

Sounds like a 16 year old boy. lol

[bcgirl]

You are definitely not ready to get married if you want to find miss perfect. Marriage is about loving her for who she is, her faults and imperfections. It's a lot of hard work. You are In this together, forever. Yes during that course people do age! She is 30 now and guess what, she will be 50 one day. Aging affects every single person and nobody is immune. Do her a favor and let her off easily now. You go play the single field, bang a few more girls so u can brag to your friends. Because if u marry her, your urge to crave lust and young, sexy booty will one day be too much that will eventually lead to cheating

[HeartIsAching]

Agree with the above posters, if not necessarily with the harshness of their answers.

First off, whether she makes more, less or the same money as you should be irrelevant. Second, few women have "perfect" bodies, and none of them keep them as they age. So what? REAL sexual attraction is mostly mental and emotional anyway. Additionally, it's pretty much normal to be attracted to women your own age. These days I can look at a 20 year old girl and think she's pretty, but mostly what I'm seeing is a little girl.

I think it's time for you to grow up and re-prioritize.

[bcgirl]

^ he is thinking with his cock and obviously not ready to settle down. The evolutionary notion seems to ring true most of the time. Although most men will say their wives are the prettiest even if she is an old bag with 50 extra pounds, it's because they love them. It's also no coincidence that the pages of playboy and maxim magazine is filled with women with perfect hourglass figures, a pretty face and young. This is what men find sexy. Evolutionary speaking, men are wired to like youth and appearance in choosing a mate and women tend to value security in a mate. Realistically, couples who are about equally attractive statistically have better relationships. Also statistically marriages where the man is at least a few years older than the wife are better relationships too. Go figure

[haxan]

Lol, tough crowd.

The guy is 30 and has slept with 4 girls !!! That's absurd. He needs, He owes it to himself to experience life and meet different types of women before he settles down for the long term. 4 women is a good week for younger guys who are sewing their oats.

OP, I say go with your instinct. Get out there and see what's around, have some fun. Then, decide what you want.

[pisces25]

Decide what he wants? You think that girl is still gonna be waiting for him?

[bcgirl]

^ i sure hope that girl ain't gunna wait for him. But he needs to learn before getting married. Screw other girls, get dumped by other girls, catch an std etc. it's all part of some ppl's learning process before they really are ready to settle down. If he gets married he will constantly think the grass is greener on the other side, and that would not be fair to her

[searock]

I don't think sleeping with 4 persons in a lifetime is too little... maybe because I'm still relatively young, maybe because I'm a woman..? If one is lucky enough to find a person they love and enjoy being with (including sexually), it seems stupid to give it all away just for the sake of "experimenting more".

[pisces25]

catch an std etc. it's all part of some ppl's learning process before they really are ready to settle down.

Really? I sure missed out. I agree in the sense if he has doubts he should leave but it's his whole attitude which sucks ie There are a few negative things I obsess about as well. First, although she's educated and has a good job, she's less educated than I am and will make less $$$ guaranteed. We're the same age, which means I won't have a young body to look at in my older days (nor would she I guess but women don't seem to care about looks/age as much). She was married once before but her ex-husband cheated on her. She's beautiful and has a nice body but she doesn't have the perfect body of some of the girls I see around and that makes me think if I can do better.

For that reason alone he should leave coz she deserves better.

And for the record OP girls don't want their partner turning into a fat blob when they get married either, we still like to be sexually attracted to our partner.