Online dating stalker ... I'm scared, what do I do?!

[MikeNessMonster]

So I don't really know where else to post this and I'm really in need of advice.

So I met this guy online on POF, and at first we really hit it off. He seemed very nice and friendly and down to earth. We chatted for about a week, and over time a few small details about my life slipped out naturally (like what city I live in, the school I go to, etc). Well, we had planned to get together this tuesday and meet, but he wouldn't give me a true answer about when he was free. He had previously deleted his POF account so we started chatting on gmail chat and also through texting. My gmail has my full name on it due to needing that for a class assignment and I just kept the email (I've never been in a situation where it was dangerous for someone to have my full name). Shortly thereafter, he started to act very clingy, so I decided to call it off.

He exploded angrily "LOSE MY NUMBER, THANKS FOR NOTHING!", then continued to say "I didn't want to be your tuesday night, I wanted to be your forever and ever!" and even went so far as to say "You're giving up on your soulmate" etc etc. I stopped texting him yesterday afternoon and he has not bugged me since, but I'm a little scared.

Here is the information he knows about me:
My first and last name
My phone number
The general area where I live
What company I work for (I think)
When my birthday is and where I will be celebrating (concerns me the most ... I actually lied to him before I stopped talking to him and told him I was too sick to party and he seemed to believe me.)

Should I be worried!? When I look back I realize how silly I was to let him know all of that ... please only positive comments. Most of the conversations we had were on his POF account which he deleted, so he no longer has that info unless he copied and pasted it and kept it.

Is this something to worry about? My birthday is coming up soon and I don't want to have to worry about him trying to locate me at the bars.

[HeartIsAching]

Yes, you should be worried. Not necessarily terrified, but be aware of your surroundings, and stay with people if possible for a while. He sounds like he's got issues.

[LostInVegas]

Yeah it seems like you led him on and then dumped him because he started to get feelings for you. A short period of stalking is justified in this case i reckon. Bite the bullet and dont be such a cock-tease next time.

[MikeNessMonster]

Yeah it seems like you led him on and then dumped him because he started to get feelings for you. A short period of stalking is justified in this case i reckon. Bite the bullet and dont be such a cock-tease next time.

I don't owe him anything, especially not a guy I've only spoken to online for a week. I never promised him anything. I called things off because he was starting to freak me out and I was concerned for my safety. If that isn't justified I don't know what is.

And feelings about being soul mates after a week of casually chatting!? WTF.

[MikeNessMonster]

Yes, you should be worried. Not necessarily terrified, but be aware of your surroundings, and stay with people if possible for a while. He sounds like he's got issues.

How long until I should stop worrying? I'm going to be with a group of people on my birthday. If he continues to text me, then what?

[LostInVegas]

I don't owe him anything, especially not a guy I've only spoken to online for a week. I never promised him anything. I called things off because he was starting to freak me out and I was concerned for my safety. If that isn't justified I don't know what is.

And feelings about being soul mates after a week of casually chatting!? WTF.

Well Mike, maybe you have one of these great personalities that attract people after a short time. I've only shared 2 posts with you, and already im feeling a connection. Love doesnt own a watch you know. It doesnt know if its 1 week or 5 years. Some women dont understand the power they possess.

[Cerby]

How long until I should stop worrying? I'm going to be with a group of people on my birthday. If he continues to text me, then what?

Simply do not reply to texts, complete silence, this is the quickest way to get someone to stop texting you. If he threatens you, then you need to contact the police.

For now, just play it safe, check your social media settings to make sure nothing is public, and keep an eye on your surroundings. I don't think you should be terrified (like HIA said), just be concerned, don't walk down any dark alleys alone kind of thing. A couple of weeks and he'll have given up.

But I state clearly, do not respond to ANY communication from him.

[LostInVegas]

Dont walk down any dark alleys? **** me, lol.

[MikeNessMonster]

Well Mike, maybe you have one of these great personalities that attract people after a short time. I've only shared 2 posts with you, and already im feeling a connection. Love doesnt own a watch you know. It doesnt know if its 1 week or 5 years. Some women dont understand the power they possess.

Love after one week does not exist. Infatuation, lust, obsession, yes, which can all be dangerous given the person is desperate and lonely enough. Regardless of "how much power" I possess it does not mean that I owe anything to a guy just because he is being creepy and telling me I'm his "forever and ever" after not even meeting me. Oh, and did I mention that he accused me of going out on a date with some other guy randomly when I told him I was feeling sick and wanted to go to bed? Not normal behavior. Its possessive and obsessive behavior. In other words, unhealthy.

[Wakeup]

How long until I should stop worrying? I'm going to be with a group of people on my birthday. If he continues to text me, then what?

I dunno, why don't you tell us where you'll be and what day your BD is and we'll all meet up as designated bodyguards? Don't forget to include your phone number so we can confirm wit ya. :o)

I don't think you need to worry, he's likely just a poser himself and there's plentyoffish in the sea that he likely won't be fixated on just you. He just sounds like a bitter sole who has gotten crabby from being baited and then thrown back one too many times. Clam up about your personal info in the future until you're sure that your catch of the day isn't a bottom feeder.

[MikeNessMonster]

Simply do not reply to texts, complete silence, this is the quickest way to get someone to stop texting you. If he threatens you, then you need to contact the police.

For now, just play it safe, check your social media settings to make sure nothing is public, and keep an eye on your surroundings. I don't think you should be terrified (like HIA said), just be concerned, don't walk down any dark alleys alone kind of thing. A couple of weeks and he'll have given up.

But I state clearly, do not respond to ANY communication from him.

If I have blocking capabilities on my phone, should I use them? I'm just worried that if I ignore him completely he may get desperate and try to contact me personally?

[LostInVegas]

Love after one week does not exist. Infatuation, lust, obsession, yes, which can all be dangerous given the person is desperate and lonely enough. Regardless of "how much power" I possess it does not mean that I owe anything to a guy just because he is being creepy and telling me I'm his "forever and ever" after not even meeting me. Oh, and did I mention that he accused me of going out on a date with some other guy randomly when I told him I was feeling sick and wanted to go to bed? Not normal behavior. Its possessive and obsessive behavior. In other words, unhealthy.

Im so attracted to you right now, Mike.

[Wakeup]

If I have blocking capabilities on my phone, should I use them? I'm just worried that if I ignore him completely he may get desperate and try to contact me personally?

Over-re-action. He's not done anything to even remotely be called a danger or a stalker. Why are you making a mountain out of what is currently just a molehill?

I stopped texting him yesterday afternoon and he has not bugged me since, but I'm a little scared.

Why don't you just relax and if he does contact you again.. don't respond. He's already told YOU to loose HIS number so why not oblige and step down from the worry train.

[MikeNessMonster]

Over-re-action. He's not done anything to even remotely be called a danger or a stalker. Why are you making a mountain out of what is currently just a molehill?

Why don't you just relax and if he does contact you again.. don't respond. He's already told YOU to loose HIS number so why not oblige and step down from the worry train.

Well hopefully I am making a mountain out of a molehill - I just want to be cautious and not ignore the situation.

Because he said to lose him number, THEN proceeded to beg me "not to give up on your soul mate, we can have team work and heal each other's wounds, and I didnt wanna just be your tuesday night, I wanted to be your foreva and eva!"

[Wakeup]

Yes.. well, he hasn't continued on in his little rant so let it rest until/if you're actually being stalked, hassled or he continues to contact you, i say.

If/when he does contact you again then you can use your blocking app and he'll more than likely get the hint. Chances of him taking this any further are slim so just see how he is from now until your B'day. More than likely he's just gotten bitter from the bs of online dating and the posers therein and his "lines" were just his way of paying you back for not entertaining his own bs (re: seeming to be interested but stalling to meet with you). If he was obsessed with you then I think he would have jumped at the chance to meet face to face. Be cautious but don't board a run-away-train of paranoid thoughts.