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Thread: Please help me figure her out or the situation at least?

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Nov 2012
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    7

    Please help me figure her out or the situation at least?

    Ok, so be prepaired for a long read- in order to fully explain what is going I must start from the beginning (we where together 2 months still kinda are?)

    Ok so I moved to CA from AZ. Met this girl on an online dating site- we talked for two weeks before we ever even met. I really began to like her alot, she was funny intelligent, good looking, and down to earth. So after we had been talking a week she told me that if I asked her to marry her she would say yes. (A little fast I know but I really liked her at this point, and I was looking for a long term relationship anyways. So I rolled with it. She also told me she loved me at about day 10. I ran with it- I began to question if I was in love with her- but knew it was to soon- however I could see myself falling for her in the future.

    So we finally meet and go on our first date. She wanted to come over and cuddle, I said sure but we aren't going in the bedroom(wanted to take it slow) Well she said she wanted to go to the bedroom I followed and laid down. She then said it was uncomfortable to sleep in jeans, and took them off- everyone knows what happened next.

    Things continue to go well, I cooked her dinner, we went to movies, we were enjoying each other very much. She began telling me I was the best she ever had etc, she continued to tell me she loved me etc.
    Well things didnt work out for me in CA so I moved to TX which is where im originally from. She has family in Texas about an hour from where I moved, she called me and told me shes coming down. I said great come on down we can build a life and continue our relationship. She gets here and is almost HIGH to be with me in TX. Things go great for about 3 weeks.
    Then all of a sudden she tells me she wants to go back to the dating stage and here is why. She just moved here, is drawing unemployment, and needed to get a job to support her and her 4 year old daughter, and she needed to focus on that but that we should slow down. I totally agreed and went with it.
    Well five days later she ends it. She keeps telling me a part of her doesnt want to loose me, but she might move back to CA. I said ok do what you gotta do.
    Well, long story short she is now sending all kinds of mixed messages. She used to call me "her cowboy: and she referred to me as cowboy tonight. We used to have this thing where she would say she was excited to see me, and I would reply Im more excited and she would say no she was more excited. I told her I would come hang out and I was looking forawrd to it, and she said she was looking forward to it more- which is what we used to say.
    She also got super upset when I mentioned my EX(she knew me and my ex are best friends, and she never had a problem with us talking in the past, in fact I let her know every time I spoke to the ex out of respect)
    Finally I think she lied to me about something. I told her yesterday we needed space, that I would contact her on the weekend and we could hang out then but until then we shouldnt talk due to all the emotions and feelings we still have for each other.
    six hours later she texts me and tells me her phone is going to be shut off til saturday. She then called me and told me shes leaving saturday for CA. I asked if I could come see her friday. She said she wanted to see me today( this conversation took place yesterday) I should have said jut use your moms or brothers phone to contact me friday but went ahead and did it anyways. So now im thinking she just wanted to see me.

    I get down there and she keeps looking at me like she used to. She tells me she still cares for me, and loves me very much but that she is lost. She proceeds to tell me she might not go back to CA ( which I knew she wasnt because her unemployment is 500 bucks and that is not enough to get your from TX to CA when you calculate gas hotels and food.) I then ask her if I could come see her this weekend before she goes and she said yes. So basically I dont know what to do- I really really care for this woman- she is smart funny compassionate and down to earth not to mention gorgeous. Please help me decipher what she is doing- its like she tells me to come closer but then pushes me away.
    sorry for the long post.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Feb 2011
    Gender
    Male
    Location
    Langley, BC
    Posts
    2,344
    She doesn't know what she wants and it taking you along for the ride. Don't hangout with her, tell her you need space and to only contact you if she is interested in a relationship. If she contacts you with anything other than that, simply don't respond or respond with something simple like "This isn't part of the agreement" and ignore future communication.

    Right now she is playing games, threatening to leave when she probably won't, meeting you and saying sweet things without actually doing anything about it. Stop getting your strings pulled.
    "All is fair in love and war." - Francis Edward Smedley

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