My boyfriend and I have been together for over 2 years. A year into the relationship, I broke up with him because I felt he didnt really care about the relationship anymore. There was another guy involved that I thought could give me the things that he couldnt but 3 weeks later I realized that I had made the wrong decision. We got back together and were together for another 9 months and then he broke up with me. We were broken up for another 6 months and this time was very horrible and torturing for me. We have been back together for a month now and we have reached a point that I am not sure we can come back up from. He doesnt understand why I am not fed up with the way he has treated me these last 6 months. He says that I must have a mental issue because no one person can deal with so much and still want to keep the relationship. He says that he loves me but not like he loved me before I broke up with him. He says that he doesnt know if he'll ever love that way again and he doesnt want to hurt me. He has left the decision of fighting for the relationship or ending up to me but i'm not sure what the smart thing would be to do. There are many other factors that play into the relationship and our emotions but it would take too long to explain all of that. Can anyone help me out with this one?
Thank you
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Thread: What is he really saying?
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24-11-12, 01:46 AM #1
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What is he really saying?
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24-11-12, 01:58 AM #2
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You're not sure what the smart thing would be to do? Really? You've broken up several times. That alone tells you that you're not meant to be LIFE partners so why keep torturing one another. When you break up with him this time, do.not.contact.him.again. (Said with periods between so that you'd read it slowly). You are no good for one another so get the gurl ballzzz to go through a hurting period (and with the no contact) eventually you'll come out the otherside free and clear of this codependent hold he has over you. You abuse yourself by going back with someone who is not in it enough to keep it together.
He'll leave the decision up to you... which means I'll **** you as long as you let me but don't expect me to be a good boyfriend while I do it. Thats the jist of your current relationship. Surely you think you deserve better than this mans crumbs.
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24-11-12, 02:01 AM #3
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What's he really saying? He's saying he's not invested in the relationship. Duh.
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24-11-12, 02:26 AM #4
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There is something about you that his dislikes, which you are leaving out.
I strongly believe couples should workout at the gym together. Get their anger out through exercise and then have passionate sex when they get home.
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25-11-12, 02:15 AM #5
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Well, IMO, you're unstable and you don't know what you want. You dumped him for a better guy and you wonder why "he doesn't love you the same way as before?".
Originally Posted by michelle18_
Let him be, sorry but he will be better off without you. As to what you should do... Maybe work out why you sabotaged the relationship... Childhood issues with abandonment? Borderline personality disorder?
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25-11-12, 02:17 AM #6
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Lol.......
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26-11-12, 04:11 AM #7
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Did you cheat on him? Only reason men fall out of love is cheating or your a constant nag not sure which you done but has to be one or the other. You need to fill us in on why he lost his love for you?
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26-11-12, 04:28 AM #8
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You broke up with him , after 1 year relationship,and then you instantly get with another dude..And you are now asking why he isn't comitted.Funny way of thinking that you ladies got..If you want him to love you,talk him about it,and ask him how she wants you to be like.Try to be that kind of person,and he will notice it,and begin to love you like old times..
Or you can just wait until he finds one hot b!tch and leave you for her because he will think you doesn't worth the effort....
Sorry if it sounded rough,but its the truth.
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26-11-12, 04:37 AM #9
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NO! Funny way of thinking that the OP has got. Please don't lump us all into her category, mmm'kay. Originally Posted by bass12345
Last edited by Wakeup; 26-11-12 at 05:16 AM.
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26-11-12, 04:53 AM #10
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I agree with some of what Bass wrote. You left him for someone else - this is why he no longer feels the same about you.
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27-11-12, 04:36 AM #11
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He has left everything up to you? A relationship takes 2 people getting involved, not 1. Sounds like he has a bit of learning to do. You leaving him the first time probably gave him a bit of trust issues towards you so unless you earned his trust back it was inevitable that he would end up leaving you. I personally don't believe he loves you any less than he use to, he just has his mind clouded at the current moment with issues or negative things that have been introduced into the relationship. I think you two need to sit down and talk this one out together. If either of you has lost the commitment to make things work which it sounds like he has, you are better off leaving him before he leaves you. I would give each other space first though, then talk about the issues and come to an agreement. No need to continually bring things up after they are already discussed but some reassurance wouldn't hurt. You are not crazy by the way, it is just difficult for him to understand you since he himself probably wouldn't endure what he is capable of dishing out, and you can endure that.
