Proposing without a ring

[sadie_genie]

It is not about the material things. It is how much thought you put into the proposal and if you have consulted her thoughts on it. If she told you specially, she doesn't want an engagement ring (in those exact words), then don't buy her one. If she didn't say that, then she probably meant she doesn't want too much money spent on it then get her one that is not too expensive but something you put thought into selecting. Make sure the proposal is well thought out so it shows you are serious about her.

[DreamBeans]

These are all really useful posts. I left out a vital piece of information in my original post though, which is my fault as the window timed out and I didn't check it thoroughly enough before I re-wrote and posted it. My GF is Asian, and I live in Asia, so in her culture engagement rings are not expected. Here wedding rings are far more significant, but even then many people don't actually wear their wedding rings, but have them safely kept at home.

The question is do I embrace my culture and get her a nice engagement ring, or should I go with my original plan? Just to clarify though, people do give engagement rings but it's not expected.

Although she has said if i buy her a ring she doesn't want it to be expensive, she didn't actually say that she doesn't want a ring.

[smackie9]

You already have discussed this with her so I really don't understand why you are even bothering to ask a bunch of strangers on the Internet.... just propose to her, and then go together to pick out a ring she would like. A friend of mine was proposed to while sitting on the couch watching TV. Her old man just said "Well what do you think about us getting married?" LOL. Some women just want to hear you pop the question and don't care about the fanfair that goes with it.

[Wakeup]

Although she has said if i buy her a ring she doesn't want it to be expensive, she didn't actually say that she doesn't want a ring.[/

Well, there ya go then. She's given you your answer.

[AnnonymousMan]

Does this sound like a good plan?

Tough situation. I would say buy the ring anyway. Nothing expensive, just something that is at least decent. If you propose without a ring it won't be as memorable. If you are afraid of buying something she doesn't like then take her to look at rings and get her opinion of them. Do not buy one when she is there though, just look at them with her and come back later to pick one up that you noticed she wanted. You can't be so direct about asking her about this crap though, she wants a surprise bro.

[DreamBeans]

Thank you everyone for the advice. I tried to get her ring information size without making it too obvious, but seeing as she doesn't wear rings and the only ones she has aren't for her ring finger, I had to just ask her and she doesn't know! So we are going to go to a few jewelry stores this weekend to check out some rings and to get her finger sized. Although it's going to take the surprise out of it, at least I won't have to worry about getting one that's too small or one she doesn't like.

Here's another quick question for people out there who have gone ring shopping with their partner before marriage. How do you do it without the staff coming on too strong? Especially if I am there with my GF?

[smackie9]

LOL! Dude if the ring doesn't fit the jeweler can resize it afterwards.



As for shopping for a ring, a good jeweler will ask you your price range and what style before you even start looking. If the sales people are too aggressive you are at a shitty jeweler, you just leave. Even at a high end stores they do sell inexpensive rings so don't be intimidated going there.

[AnnonymousMan]

Although it's going to take the surprise out of it

What I ment by surprise is the moment you choose to propose to her and your timing from which what you have already told us sounds perfect. Getting the ring and all of that when you cannot even get her finger size... try asking her mother or best friend. If this doesn't work then you are forced to get her finger sized.

[AnnonymousMan]

LOL! Dude if the ring doesn't fit the jeweler can resize it afterwards.

This is costly and annoying. I strongly suggest getting the right size since you don't want to give her a ring she cannot even fit onto her finger.

(Sorry for double post)

[priya23]

I think your engagement ring is doesn't have to be expensive, right lolz. sorry i just kidding but its more nice if u buy a ring for her .

[pkumar]

i think that's very wise of both of you.

[Michelle789]

Good luck and have fun.

[smackie9]

Yes it is. If the last post is over 2 to 3 weeks old don't bother. This one is like 6 months old.

[searock]

Yes it is. If the last post is over 2 to 3 weeks old don't bother. This one is like 6 months old.

I hope the thread doesn't get closed though - sometimes the OPs return to give updates...

[smackie9]

Yes that is what we have been waiting for...