should i give it a try

[robert allen]

so ive posted before about this particular girl but its been a while. basically i dated her for almost two years when i was 17 and thought she was the one but it didnt work out at the time. fast forward- im 24 now and we have remained friends through all the good and bad including her having a kid by a deadbeat loser. i have always loved this girl and she knows i have wanted her back for a long time. she was in a semi-serious relationship for the past two years and that recently came to an end and she has opened the idea of her and i giving it another shot. in my heart i feel like she is the one but my mind is hesitant to go down a road that ive been before that didnt work out. i cant help but feel like its only gotten to this point because shes tried everything and now that im still here shes going with the last resort. ive discussed my feelings with her openly about it and she says i should just be happy with the end result of us being happy together (hopefully). i can see where she is coming from but that is just the first hurdle in the way. she is not interested in having more kids and ive made it clear to her that will be a deal brakes for me, so the question is should i even give this thought if she is not willing to compromise?

[RipVanWinkleX]

Well it's up to you. She could be asking the same thing. Are you willing to compromise?

[robert allen]

on that subject no. i dont think its fair to me to never get the chance to be a father just because she had a kid too young with a loser.

[Cerby]

on that subject no. i dont think its fair to me to never get the chance to be a father just because she had a kid too young with a loser.

Then it isn't going to work. You want kids, she doesn't want more, no sides are willing to compromise within sight. So why waste your time? You're looking for "the one" and if she doesn't have the same relationship goals as you do, she isn't it.

[bcgirl]

on that subject no. i dont think its fair to me to never get the chance to be a father just because she had a kid too young with a loser.

You can still be a step-father to her and raise him like you would your own

[RipVanWinkleX]

You can still be a step-father to her and raise him like you would your own

I respect anyone who does this. You said the real father was a deadbeat loser, I do not know why, but if it's true then you can always be the father figure. Just don't hope that she will change her mind. If she does great, but DO NOT GO IN THE RELATIONSHIP THINKING THAT SHE MIGHT.