So confused please help

[Love hurts]

Hi I'm new here. I've been with my gf for over 2 yrs. I gave up everything to be with her as she seemed to be the one. Problem is I feel like shes lost intrest. I know I'm probably insecure and clingy but its because i love her and partly because I'm scared of losing her. I'm an average guy but always treat her well. She's been with violent abusive exs I'm nothing like them. I'm with her most of the week and do a lot for her. I sometimes stay with friends for a few days 50 miles away but shes saying we shouldn't be together as much and limited me seeing her to a few days a week. It feels like she dosent want me. She's a pretty woman so I know she get attention of men and I worry shes upto something. My heart is pounding from the stress. She is under lots of stress so I thought she'd want me there during tough times.
Or is she trying to get rid of me slowly. Very confused.

[geminimoongal]

Sounds like you are too nice for her. She probably likes guys she has to run after. You need to ignore her and get a life. Let her see you are not that bothered and she might change.

[jolene austin]

I don’t know about this one. I’ve been in a similar situation where I left a job and made a move to be closer to someone. After about a year and a half things began to cool off. I think a cool of period is normal but ours gradually led into fights and disagreements that about 6 months later were central to our breaking up. Has she been upset or neglectful of you in any other way? It does sound to me like she is gradually slipping out of love. Remember that when she needs time apart it means she wants you to have time apart to. Perhaps to give you a hint that maybe you might be interested elsewhere. I think you need to communicate with her. Try not to start a fight and certainly don’t accuse her of anything. Just let her know that you think you guys are drifting apart.

[Fruitss]

Sounds like u r very young and immature.
And dont know what love is..

I think maybe u r too annoying for her.
Have a conversation, and break up

[Love hurts]

Thanks for replying. We are in late 30s. She's very independent and quite dominant. I've somehow made her my world. Ill do anything for her. I feel lost without her which is prob not the best thing being I'm the guy in the relationship. She mentions things about the future with me which make me think she wants to be with me but right now she has become distant from me. I have no proof shes cheating and believe me I've checked. I'm worried if I stop being there for her so much she'll think I don't care anymore. I don't want to be clingy but I've ended up totally in love with her and its hard.

[leapfrog]

Give her her space. When she's ready, she'll let you know. I understand shes going through a lot but seems like youre more needy then her.

[tillyb]

Space is very important. There is a chinese proverb that says something like 'let there be spaces in our togetherness'. Time with yourself is important. Having come from bad relationships, she will appreciate her 'me' time and be cautious with a new relationship. You don't need to be together all the time. Respect her wishes and see where it goes. All to often in relationships we lose ourselves and we make our life about our partner. This happens without us even realising this but it does. You still need to be your own person. Have your own interests, hobbies etc. This will make you a stronger person. Think of your life as a pie. Each part of your life is allocated a piece of this pie. So for example: 25% work, 20% family, x% hobbies, x% love. This is how you will find a harmonious balance in your life and perhaps she has the same thoughts.

[bcgirl]

Google "fusers" and "isolaters". Your very clingy in the relationship and she craves her space. Having your own hobbies are a good idea but you definitely need to get your insecurities of her running off with someone else in check. Your making yourself paranoid and crazy over this and that ain't healthy

[wesir]

If you are in a relationship and you are worried that she might be doing things behind her back then you have a red flag. Trust is a major factor and either she is doing something that is making you distrust her, or you are to insecure.

My advice is this. Figure out which it is.

You say that the two of you are in contact with each other allot. But now she wants a little space. Putting aside your fears - what do you think? Should you give her some space? I am going to assume the answer is yes. In which case I suggest you find something to do while you are not with her. Often strong confident women want space and they don't like a men 24-7, more so if she is busy. From your description it seems the only reason you are worried is that she is hot and allot of men will hit on her. But ask yourself this..... Can you ever stop this from happening? On the bus, the road, tube, walking home and the coffee shop. Of course not. You need to put your faith in this women and place action in yourself to work on those insecurities. Otherwise she is going to get annoyed with you and you are going to get more and more paraniod.

Look at it this way. if you are seeing each other a few days a week thats actually not bad is it? Thats very regular. I do suggest if you feel she is losing interest take her somewhere random. Do something you don't or hardly do. Take her mini-golf or ice skating just for a change.