Hello everyone,
I have never been on a forum before so i thought I'd come on here and ask for some advice, I am a gay man aged 22 from Swansea, UK. Here is what i need advice on.
I have known this person for about 12 years of my life and we've always had a strong bond as friends but over the past 4 years my feelings have for him have gotten stronger and i believe i am in love with him. I'm not a very obvious gay person I don't wear strange clothes or go out on the scene or do any of the normal gay thing that other gay people i know do. In fact I am the complete opposite I love football, Xbox and going out to rock bars and rock clubs. I'm nothing special i just blend in with everyone else, although I am out to everyone I know and anyone who asks me if then I'll tell them the truth because I have nothing to be ashamed of. Now back to the reason i am on here, I have this constant feeling of wanting to be with him we spend most of our time together as we both enjoy the same things. we also worked together for a long time too but recently our employers changed so we work separately now, but now all i can think about is what is he doing and am i going to lose him but i never really had him to lose...this is where i am getting upset with myself. I know i cannot have him and i never will be able to have him but i cannot let go of the feelings for him. I don't want to lose him as a friend because of this either, he knows that I have stronger feelings for him but he doesn't try to end our friendship everything just carries on as it was. I believe that is where my head and heart are getting mixed up, I tell myself he doesn't want me but yet after I told him how I feel he is still there.
please help me, i don't want to die an old single gay man still wishing for something that could never be.
thanks for reading i hope you have some advice on what I should do...
joe