broken trust

[brian4534]

okay I'll start off by explaining my relationship with my girlfriend/x-fiance. I'm 34 yrs old and recently she just took a trip to California which another guy paid for the trip and everything. Heres the thing she spent this time with him and they kissed. She won't admit to sleeping with him but i suspect it happened. I told her to quit talking to him but she still is. Also she came back for me she said we were engaged when she left but she said we need to slow down now. Everything seems to be falling apart. Now she came back and seems distant and not that into me but she says she loves me and wants to stay together. Okay here is the other kicker before she left she didn't really have any friends now she has people from her past that she is going to go out with they are all guys. Tonight she went out with somebody that has cerable palsy and has a hook hand this is what she said. But i drove by her house and saw who was picking her up and the guy was in a newer car and driving. this is driving me crazy and my health is suffering. Anybody have good advice should i end it? my gut telling me to but i love her so much hard to move on. Any women want to weigh in on this would help? Also she tells me she loves me am i being to paranoid?

[ashley89]

end it. she is sketchy, who is this "other guy" who paid for her trip? isn't that strange to you? she most definitely slept with this guy, and now she's hanging out with other men? she's a liar, has no respect for you and could care less about your relationship. dump this girl and move on to someone who deserves and respects you

[brian4534]

this all just happened she just came back on saturday. the other guy was somebody from her past i told her not to go but she said she resent me for it. she is bi-polar and has other issues. so much has happened that has destroyed my trust for her. we had sex on saturday and it was great but it didn't feel right to me afterwards. dump her sounds right. She said she never lie to me and said it was a mistake she was confused a lot happened between us before she left i made some mistakes. we had a huge fight on New Years.

[brian4534]

anybody else want to weigh in how should i go about this? Should i get the ring back it was a 700$ ring? I'm just afraid of the back lash and wondering if its worth trying to save? I'll now my decision if she comes home tonight and calls me from home. I haven't been able to get sleep. It is really affecting me mentally.

[ashley89]

yeah it sounds like you are really unhappy, she has totally destroyed your trust in her and doesn't seem to even care. it isn't right for her to go and hang out or do whatever with these other guys and then try to come back to you and say she loves you. if she really loved and cared about you she wouldn't treat you like that! it is a tough thing to do because you obviously love her but I think in the long run it is for the better. you will be happier and can spend your time finding someone who is a better match for you

[Turbo]

Is this for real? WTF is your GF going away with some dude and HE is paying for her?

And the hook-hand thing just sounds nutty, how did you get close enough to see the guy driving her, but she didnt notice YOU?

Sounds very fishy.

-J

[Beenthere]

Just because you had a fight on New Years doesnt give your fiance the right to go on holidays with another man. Where did she sleep when on holidays together? Take a step back and imagine it was your friend telling you about this. What would you say? You got to pluck up the courage and get out of this relationship. She's not being honest and hasnt treated you well.