What if I'm not good looking?

[MajikalMethod]

Understand this, looks really don’t matter. With modern day science (and I don’t mean surgery… I’m talking about some simple products from Walgreens.) there aren’t too many guys out there who can not clean them selves up and look halfway decent in public. Shower daily, wash your face, brush your teeth… Simply, grow up. Learn how to put together a decent outfit that works for you and get some new clothes. You don’t have to look like you are rich, just don’t look like a bum. If you are balding and you don’t like it, shave your head. If you think you are too fat or too skinny, hit the gym and get on a diet that works for you. Consciously base your self esteem and inner confidence level on things other than women’s approval!

Because that is what truly attracts a woman… A good self-esteem and confidence. Be comfortable in your own skin and if you don’t like something about yourself, change it. In order for a woman to be happy with you, she has to see that you are happy with yourself too. Women are very emotional creatures and can catch onto the fact that you are insecure about yourself almost immediately. If you are positive about yourself, you will give off a positive vibe, and women will respond positively to you.

The Theory of Perception plays very heavily into self-esteem and self confidence. Perception involves making a decision about something based on our best guess of what we see. How does that relate to dealing with women? When you look in the mirror, if you see someone who is not confident in themselves, that is exactly what you are looking at. Look at yourself as an individual who DESERVES better quality women and that is what you will become.

[ashley89]

looks do matter to an extent. of course personality, confidence, and self-esteem are what keeps people together, but if there is no physical attraction the relationship won't work.

[Wakeup]

Looks get you in the door when you're working cold. I don't think they matter as much if you're in a situation where you get to know the actual person over time. When you get to see the positive attributes that are not physical, then you will see them in a different light and then they become physically attractive to you.

Ever wonder why some socially dictated unattractive men get with beautiful women... It's because these men are much more than their looks.

to add:

The Theory of Perception plays very heavily into self-esteem and self confidence. Perception involves making a decision about something based on our best guess of what we see. How does that relate to dealing with women? When you look in the mirror, if you see someone who is not confident in themselves, that is exactly what you are looking at. Look at yourself as an individual who DESERVES better quality women and that is what you will become.

That is the jist of The Secret. To visualize-believe-receive... and it applies in in all things, not just in being able to pull women. ;o)

[Kromat83]

I got my current girlfriend looking close to this :
http://img152.imageshack.us/img152/6634/224matt.png ,

and i just started being myself again, and not let the weight dictate who i am inside.

I lost the pounds for my New Years Resolution, to look like this after just 1 month :
http://img585.imageshack.us/img585/2954/187matt.png ,

because i just wanted more energy, and it would improve my confidence and self-esteem even more, and she even realized it, and loves what i have become in just 2 months time.

Women are attracted to successful people, knowing that they are capable of taking care of them in the future.
They need to get to know them first, but the foundation is laid for them, not they just need to share their love with that person.

[fearoflove]

Grooming helps some guys but not all. Some people are just born ugly. I haven't laid eyes on an ugly dude and thought he was attractive.

[michelle23]

Horrible teeth is a big turn off. And I don't like men who look scruffy (need a shave, a haircut, etc) and I think everyone should take pride in there appearance. I don't like slobs, too hairy, overweight etc.

[Kromat83]

Horrible teeth is a big turn off. And I don't like men who look scruffy (need a shave, a haircut, etc) and I think everyone should take pride in there appearance. I don't like slobs, too hairy, overweight etc.

your quite shallow aren't you ?
If the person is confident, who cares if they are overweight, he can change his appearance whenever he wants, but all that you go for is looks ? then the type of people you will get, wont have the same good qualities, that you might want to find, why limit yourself ?


need a shave, a haircut, etc ?
really ? maybe they like that type of look, why judge them on that ?

it's like someone with tattoos, we generally think he's a bad person,
when he might just like the way they look, and might be quite nice.

[michelle23]

your quite shallow aren't you ?
If the person is confident, who cares if they are overweight, he can change his appearance whenever he wants, but all that you go for is looks ? then the type of people you will get, wont have the same good qualities, that you might want to find, why limit yourself ?


need a shave, a haircut, etc ?
really ? maybe they like that type of look, why judge them on that ?

it's like someone with tattoos, we generally think he's a bad person,
when he might just like the way they look, and might be quite nice.

I am not judging anyone. I am answering the question about what I find attractive. That's all. I am not shallow.If you have read any of my other posts-you would see that I think personality is sooo much more important. But with first impressions all you have to go on is looks and your either attracted to them or not.

I am just answering the question that was asked here. I know lots of lovely overweight men-good people. And my bf regularly needs a shave and sometimes doesn't have time t get a haircut for like a month lol. That does not bother me. I love him and think hes perfect even if he looks scruffy somedays. I am saying what I am attracted to on first impressions. That is all.

[Kromat83]

I was quite overweight at first and still asked my currently girl that day. I took her dancing because that what I liked as one of my hobbies, and she didn't judge me, she just wanted to meet new people and I was starting to gain my confidence back.
We are too accustomed to how people are in the moment, and not what they could be.
I lost 35 pounds for myself, not for her, as I want to have more energy in my life, and a lot of the activities I enjoy require a healthy lifestyle, as it requires motivation to succeed in life, and she awakened that desire, and I am proud of that, that she took a chance on me.

[michelle23]

Well done that is great. A friend of mine is overweight and I don't judge him at all. I don't think he is unattractive but that is just not my type. He has a gf who loves him to bits and hes obviously her type. Everyone is different.

There has to be attraction between two people for the relationship to work and you cant force it. If that makes sense?

But I would never go out with someone who had an awful personality. It wouldn't matter how good looking he is because personality is more important.

[pcmaster]

Actually looks matter a lot, because every thing you do will have much better impact. Already as a teenager I noticed that when I look good people respect me for nothing. Especialy if you are muscular guy people will respect you and dont argue too much. Every thought in your mind forms your body.

If you respect yourself you will take care of yourself and look good. People will respect you too because deep inside they know that you respect yourself.

[rob1984]

thank god im sexy.. i make brad pitt look like someone else, yes. haha jk.. I agree looks give you the advantage to go in cold, without having to wow her with the first few words that come out of your mouth.

[michelle23]

I think looks give an advantage in all areas of life from career to social life to relationships..

Its the way people are. But good looking people are the least shallow coz we know looks wont make us happy. And we see the value in other things. At least I do anyway..

[onesexyblonde]

i wasnt attracted to my bf at first even though he is extremly good looking he just wasnt my type look wise but i knew him so well that his personality was what attracted me but i had known him for years efore we dated

[Kromat83]

I think looks matter more for the males, then the females.
We grativitate more to an attractive, good looking girl, even if they might be out our league, but we share our personality with them, and hopefully they respect us for what we will offer.
Handsome males tend to be too cocky, and not in a good way like staying positive and not letting comments from others bring them down, showing others that can succeed in whatever they put their mind into.
While others use it to show, just how much better they are then everyone else.