opinions on love

[Boisdevie]

If she really loved me she would have bought me that red Ducati for Xmas. Bitch.

[Only-virgins]

Didn't we discuss this already??

But true love does exist. As soon as you stop believing it's not out there, it's over because you've given up and made yourself closed off to any possibility to it.

How do I know than that love isn't like a placebo? It's only there if you believe it.

When I thought of that, I considered how the universe is balanced. If you think about it, every positive has a negative, and every negative has a positive. Ying and yang, light and dark, hot and cold, matter and antimatter, etc etc... And I basically came to the thought what if it's the same with people...like some are meant to balance out the joy in the world by suffering and being alone all their lives... Pretty much suffering so the world can know true happiness. :S

On the contrary, the universe is quite chaotic and you can't lump things into two extreme categories. Things aren't black or white, there is a lot of grey area.

My question is does real true love really exist and how do you know? I mean we all want to believe it's real and that we will all get our happily ever afters but how do you know when you have the real thing?

Yes, love exists. One day your brain will release quite a lot of chemicals to make you want to breed, this is normal and what I call love. There is no such thing as happily ever after, there is no such thing as forever when it comes to conscious living things so it doesn't really matter. Enjoy that moment when and if it happens for you.

[basilandthyme]

I guess I think of true love as unselfish and always wanting whats best for the other person and just loving them no matter what they do or who they are. I really just don't know if that kind of love can really exist in a romantic relationship.. I think the only pure love one can have is between a parent and child because that honestly never fades.

What you are describing is 'unconditional love' and I don't believe that it's healthy in adult relationships. I have limits as to what I will endure in a relationship. eg; I simply couldn't continue to love another person who became abusive towards me or other people.

When I read posts here online, it seems some people do love their partners despite appalling behaviour, but I think that's more about dysfunction than real true love.

[dickriculous]

What you are describing is 'unconditional love' and I don't believe that it's healthy in adult relationships. I have limits as to what I will endure in a relationship. eg; I simply couldn't continue to love another person who became abusive towards me or other people.

When I read posts here online, it seems some people do love their partners despite appalling behaviour, but I think that's more about dysfunction than real true love.

I don't think most people mean the "unconditional" part of that statement to be taken literally, it's more of an exaggerated way to describe "deep love" where I'm willing to go to great lengths to make things work out.

If we take the words "unconditional love" 100% literally then what you have is the worst case of codependency of any single human being ever to walk the earth.

But then it also depends on what you mean by "love". A couple of women in my past were pretty shitty to me and while it's true that at the time I had lost the desire to be with them romantically, I still love them. Even today, years later. No grudges or anything, instead I'm hoping that they can overcome their demons or whatever it was that caused them to act the way they did so they can treat people better in the future (or I guess now but back then it was the future) and hopefully find themselves in a more fulfilling relationship as a result.

I'm done with them and chances are, we're never getting back together again (hell, what with life happening the way it is I may never even see them again). But they will never be forgotten. In that sense, my love for them really is unconditional. It's just not a romantic love where I want to stay in a committed relationship with them anymore.