Addicted to her...

[amshizzle]

I spent 3 years in a verbally abuse, mentally exhausting, chaotic relationship. The thing was, I loved her. She broke up with me in October of last year but has been living in my house until today (March 1st). I am having trouble getting over her. She was an awful partner, didn't appreciate me, never did anything sweet and never went out of her way to show affection. She put me down, cried when she couldn't get what she wanted and snapped at me for the most absurd things. Why can't I get over her? What steps should I take at easing off my apparent addiction for her? I would cut her off cold turkey but I am the guardian (and non bio parent) of our daughter. Any advice is appreciated! Help!

[rob1984]

find someone else and she will be a distant memory

[HeartIsAching]

Abusive people are good at making you dependent on them, and on making everything that goes wrong your fault.

Check these out:

http://shrink4men.wordpress.com/2009/01/30/10-signs-your-girlfriend-or-wife-is-an-emotional-bully/

http://www.amazon.com/Top-Abusive-Relationship-Books-List/lm/R32AHG6NVOKEMZ

[michelle23]

You need to meet someone else who treats u with respect. Youll realize what love is and youll forget her. Get some counselling-you probably need it 1 for all the shit she did and 2 for putting up with it for so long

[ashley89]

I would go to some counseling, it will help you to be able to clear your head and start the mental process of getting over her. it will be tough especially since you have a child together but you need to break the cycle somehow

[Only-virgins]

I would cut her off cold turkey but I am the guardian (and non bio parent) of our daughter. Any advice is appreciated! Help!

What is that? This makes no sense. If you aren't the bio parent just book it for the door.

I would go to some counseling, it will help you to be able to clear your head and start the mental process of getting over her. it will be tough especially since you have a child together but you need to break the cycle somehow

No they don't if I read that correctly.

[ashley89]

oh whoops, guess I read it wrong, I didn't see the non biological part... haha

[Rowen]

Okay, what happened today? She moved out, yes?

Don't you realize this is where it's going to get easier? Distance away from the person is key after a breakup. It's the way that the heart grows from the hurt and moves on. Give yourself time now away from her. Since she's (I'm guessing) moved out of your house, you won't see her as often. As a result, you can grow to start moving on with your life. Now, you can seriously hurt yourself by spending every minute with her...but I wouldn't suggest that.

Bottom line: You didn't have even a hint of a chance to heal because she was always there to remind you that it's over and make you long to want her back. In a situation like that, it's like dangling a block of cheese in front of a starving man. He can see it and wants it, and it's torturous. The block of cheese isn't dangled in front of you anymore...so you can stop thinking about that hunger of yours.

I hope this helps.