Turning around my "love-life" ...

[OKANEED]

Gotcha thanks

[Wakeup]

You know what... bloody cheers to you for being positive and attempting to be pro-active in changing things up instead of complaining and blaming ad-nauseum. You've definately got a good edge, I'm thinkin.

[pcmaster]

Actually guys often find themself unnoticed and friendzoned even if they was trying to be nice.

Guys who are not trying and just are who they are is having much more sucsess.

[Wakeup]

"Trying to be nice" yes. I would assume that anyone who is trying to be nice isnt' actually nice.

[pcmaster]

Not always trying but sometimes you just become too soft and too nice. Because of useless toughts in head like - Shes so special, I dont wana hurt her, scare her, be too agressive(touch her too much), shes so beautiful/sensitive I have to be gentle with her. And then girl will go to her friends and tell what a gay the guy is. At the same time another guy who dont really give a shit how special the girl is will treat her just like any other girl - be confidend hold her in his hands, make her feel good and desired will actually be more sucsesful than the nice guy whos afraid to take the risks.

[Wakeup]

Not always trying but sometimes you just become too soft and too nice. Because of useless toughts in head like - Shes so special, I dont wana hurt her, scare her, be too agressive(touch her too much), shes so beautiful/sensitive I have to be gentle with her. And then girl will go to her friends and tell what a gay the guy is. At the same time another guy who dont really give a shit how special the girl is will treat her just like any other girl - be confidend hold her in his hands, make her feel good and desired will actually be more sucsesful than the nice guy whos afraid to take the risks.

Yes. I agree with this and I also agree, OP that you should indeed avoid the "dreaded nice-guy position" Strive for the good guy with confidence position.

Do Avoid going overboard and taking it to the "asshole-level." A lot of "dreaded nice guys" confuse girls as liking assholes when we just like a guy that is confident enough to not put up with princess-like behaviour and can tell us when we are asking for too much

[OKANEED]

Thanks guys, I appreciate the advice I'm naturally pretty shy and not particularly confident, I am beginning to realize sarcasm was a bit of a defense mechanism. I've been a bit more chilled this week, no sarcasm, not being "needy", and just doing my own thing. Have to say am having an awesome time lol quick question, at the moment I have sort of realized I don't really want a girlfriend right now ... so with girls, I always feel like I am "lingering" and being needy, so I just want to work out where to be in between "dreaded nice-guy" xD and "asshole-level". Sorry I know I sound really stupid but I can assure you I am pretty socially inept with girls So for example in classes etc ... should I just talk to my own guy-friends and let girls talk to me if they want, or go and talk to them, then leave them and see if they stick around to talk? I guess I might be over-analyzing this but you guys seem to know what you are talking about so no harm in asking right? xD

Thanks Wakeup and pcmaster
Oh and thanks for the positive comment Wakeup; I am guessing you might be referring to Love'sReject with the whole ad nauseam deal

[Wakeup]

So for example in classes etc ... should I just talk to my own guy-friends and let girls talk to me if they want, or go and talk to them, then leave them and see if they stick around to talk? I guess I might be over-analyzing this but you guys seem to know what you are talking about so no harm in asking right? xD

Nope, no harm in asking. Now, I'm not expert but I think you are indeed over-thinking. You just have to play it by ear. Be confident enough to say hi and spark some sort of convo and if they're open to it then continue on. If they freeze you out then a well timed 'see ya later' should avoid any awkward exits. Its like any other social situation where you want to make cold call conversation. You do it, you gauge the reception and then you either exit or you don't depending on how you're received. Just be confident and tell your ego you refuse to feel awkward no matter what goes down.

I think some of the men will be able to guide you better on how to engage, though.

Good luck.

[pcmaster]

Just start talking and never shut up. All you have to do now is practice and use what you learned.

[OKANEED]

Thanks I'll give that all a go until the weekend and see how it works out Huh, well the last time I had guys give me advice on here it turned into LR and HIA in a flame war on the thread -.-

[basilandthyme]

How to react to girls in class? Somewhere in the middle of the two options you mentioned

Smile. Say "hi" if they are walking into class beside you. Just start by making yourself approachable.

[OKANEED]

How to react to girls in class? Somewhere in the middle of the two options you mentioned

Smile. Say "hi" if they are walking into class beside you. Just start by making yourself approachable.

Thanks for the advice, I often wonder whether to just be nice and listen to them or just go straight in with teasing and joking?