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Thread: anyone deal with narcissitic partner

  1. #16
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    ^^^ he needs to work on himself for him to be able to find a woman who isn't like the last one. If he doesn't educate himself about codependent tendencies, white knight syndrome and get over a need to caretake then he'll pick another Marilyn Monroe type and this will happen to him again. She may not be NPD but she will have some childhood issue or another that she's never come to terms with and he'll think he can fix her.

    Sadly People who choose this type of person (pity the unfortunately being born into it) often have a need within that they themselves are trying to fill. Best look into that and then he will find that woman who is beautiful from the inside out.

  2. #17
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    Ya i totally agree. Thats y i recommended counselling and healing first. Then one day he can look back and realize this is for the best that its over

  3. #18
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    Quote Originally Posted by michelle23 View Post
    All those feelings and emotions that your experiencing and your mind wandering to memories and making you cry is grief. Look up the five stages of grief. What your feeling is normal but it will get better. You just need to go through the grieving process and in time you will feel strong again. Its normal to wonder why and go over and over it in your mind. Even when you are completely over her-you may still look back at bad memories and try to form conclusions in your mind. Youll always have thse memories but one day you will look back and think "man i had a lucky escape with that crazy bitch"

    all you need is time, surround yourself with positive people that care, make new friends, join some hobbies, focus on work, exercise, do a course or study and remember it wasnt your fault.

    You will be ok. The only way is up and in time youll meey a woman who is beautiful from the inside out who will be the complete opposite to your ex and youll be very happy together

    you deserve happieness and you need to count your lucky stars that you finally got away from someone who made you so unhappy. Try to stay positive. Life is for living and you have a great future in front of you. Embrace it

    its okay to feel sad sometimes but try not to dwell on it. Lean on your family and friends when you need to
    Ann...im not attracted to narcissistic women nor did I have one in my life...in fact my main problem was probably codependency(my mother passed when I was 11)....ive read up on NPD so much it has almost become redundant lol......

    i knew something wasnt quite right....but i just couldnt walk away...i kept hoping things would change....there were even glimmers of hope along the way....and i kept hanging on....

    Michelle....the hardest part is...i used to sleep so peaceful and easily....and now its what i think about before i go to sleep...its getting better each night....and of course I have nights where im occupied and dont think about it....but its those nights alone that kill me

    what really breaks my heart is....we had known each other since we were basically children...me being 6 years older than her....we are both above average looking people and she had always had a crush on me.....finally i took a chance at an age where i figured she must be somewhat mature.....and the hell that most people endure in these kind of relationships I didnt really feel.......until it was over.....i do miss knowing someone cared about me everyday always checking up on me and telling me that they love me....holding my hand in church(we used to go every sunday with her family)....i miss the family dog(he loved me pretty much more than anyone else....the guy used to spin around in a frenzy when i walked through the door and run to the back door because he knew i was the only one that would go out and play with him for awhile).....

    almost everything else i had in the relationship was great....but my ex gf would not learn to be responsible and work steadily....and it drove me crazy seeing as how all if my friends were in relationships where both sides worked hard and worked together.....i sometimes felt alone in the regard that I was the only one making any effort in that area....and my frustration grew and grew.....it was like talking to a wall sometimes

  4. #19
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    Quote Originally Posted by Wakeup View Post
    ^^^ he needs to work on himself for him to be able to find a woman who isn't like the last one. If he doesn't educate himself about codependent tendencies, white knight syndrome and get over a need to caretake then he'll pick another Marilyn Monroe type and this will happen to him again. She may not be NPD but she will have some childhood issue or another that she's never come to terms with and he'll think he can fix her.

    Sadly People who choose this type of person (pity the unfortunately being born into it) often have a need within that they themselves are trying to fill. Best look into that and then he will find that woman who is beautiful from the inside out.
    I didnt "choose" this particular type of person persay......its more like it was hidden/kept under wraps during the honeymoon period....and of course you know how those types are in the honeymoon period...its euphoric.....its when you try to move passed that period while still maintaining moments of it that it became hard.....ya cant make everyday like "the notebook"......

    I will say this though....when i first started dating her....there had been another girl who was chasing me for like two years.....and i never went there with her....but we always talked and were good friends....when i first started dating my ex this girl was ending a relationship she had gotten into(when she got into it she said she had no choice but to move on from having a crush on me because i rebuffed it so much).....and this girl even sort of made an effort give it a last ditch shot....but she gave me some solid advice that i never really truly took to heart.....she told me to tell her everyday how beautiful she is and how much I appreciate her......and i cant say that I did....I mean I did in my own way....but probably not in the way some girls want to feel desired.....like she was my everything......but i thought the actions i had taken and the sacrifices I had made had showed that in its on way.....but i realize in the NPD mind those things quickly get pushed to the back

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