Am I Crazy or In Love

[KeyKandiss13]

Well I have a friend that has been dating this guy for a couple months and she seems so in love with him. but the problem is he is already in a committed relationship. and he always tells her that he loves her and he wants to be with her but he's not always there when she needs him. all the sneaking around and the private conversations are starting to get to her. He never takes her out anywhere but he takes care of her as far as bills and whatever she wants. my friend is starting to fall deeper for him but she really doesn't know how to deal with this difficult situation. Him and her have talked about children but nothing about marriage or anything. He really is very good to her and sweet at times. Makes her happy whenever he's around.He wants her to move in with him and his significant other but of course she's not sure about this because she wants to have him to herself. I guess you can say he wants his cake and eat it too. what should she do? should she continue with this relationship and see where it goes or should she not even waste her time? I've tried to give my opinion on this but maybe she needs to hear it from someone else.

[HeartIsAching]

One does not preclude the other...

[Cerby]

Hey Key, this is almost an textbook affair. Guy is in a serious relationship/married or whatever, but wants someone on the side. She give him sex, he pays some bills, and his wife/SO doesn't know anything. Everyone is happy in this situation, at least until true feelings come about from the third wheel (aka your friend), in which case then shit gets ugly.

Once this guy realizes your friend is in love with him, he'll probably end the affair and go find another piece of meat to stick his dick into.

There is no happy ending here for your friend, she will be strung along until she reaches a breaking point, at which point he'll cut her off cleanly and deny anything ever existed.

[Rowen]

She should dump him... She's only his personal trashcan for him to unload in.
Paint it any color you want. She needs to find a man who will just be hers.

[HeartIsAching]

Cumdumpster!

[Wakeup]

I guess you can say he wants his cake and eat it too.

I guess your friend does as well.

He wants her to move in with him and his significant other

Which indicates that his wife is aware of you er , your friend, and has agreed to the polyamorous union if your friend can handle the sharing part. Obviously his wife can.

Maybe if you ..er.. your friend read up on Polyamour and Polyamourous unions where everyone is aware of each other and equally loved and cared for, she'd be able to understand the dynamic better and would be more open to the sharing of one another.

she doesn't want to share him

Well I guess you're silly friend should have thought about that before getting herself embroiled with a man that wasn't even hers to begin with then.. Dumb move on her part, eh? Does she forget that as it is now, she's currently sharing him. Duh!

If she's unable to share even after reading up on the dynamic that he's proposing to her, then she should tell him to get lost and she should find a man of her own that she doesn't have to share.

You can start your education here: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polyamory

[IndiReloaded]

Hoo boy. So, the answer to your question is: crazy.

Please send your cheque c/o Admin @ Loveforum.net/

[Wakeup]

... lol ...

[Rowen]

Cumdumpster!

I was trying to be nice, but yes, that was the word I was going for. lmao

[HeartIsAching]

Yeah well... I'm not particularly nice. It's a failing of mine.

Well, sometimes. Sometimes it's a blessing.