Does he like me? Or not? :|

[UnhappyGirl555]

Hi everybody!

I was at work one day and this guy i work with (lets call him Larry) who I never noticed started talking to me.. Thought he was pretty cute. He asked me about my work progress and I guess he was genuinely interested in my project? My other guy friend (lets call him Tom) then came in and sat in between us. Basically me & Tom got to know Larry on that day. Ever since then, I found Larry pretty interesting and would like to get to know him a little bit more. But the thing is, he's a pretty reserved and quiet kinda guy. He's always to himself and does everything alone. We would have the same meeting every Thursday but he would never come up and talk to me at all. Not even a hi, it's like we were total strangers. A few days later, me and Tom were in the lounge taking a break from work and Larry came in. He totally disregarded me and spoke to Tom very comfortably.. He wouldn't even look at me until I joined in the conversation too. Then he started talking to me but wouldn't maintain eye contact.. He would still speak to Tom more.. So, I got over that.. The other day, I bumped into Larry at the lounge alone and I said hey.. He just looked at me and said hey but that's it. During lunch, he joined us and one of our friends was jokingly teasing me and everyone else laughed along including myself.. Larry just sat there and smiled. I then noticed him looking at me playing with my friend's iPad and it was pretty obvious because he leaned it to have a look. After lunch, he just left on his own.

I'm curious as to if this guy likes me or am I just overanalyzing his actions? I kinda like him, but he's pretty reserved and intimidating to approach. Any advice? Thank you!!

[kat82]

What does Tom think?

It sounds like the guy could just be trying to make friends (not saying he's not interested) but I think that when we feel attracted to someone, we start seeing everything as 'signs.' I would suggest trying to get to know him better, trying to start conversations with him, and see what his body language tells you further. Being shy really sucks when you like someone (I mean if he likes you, it may be difficult for him to actually show it).

[Ann S]

This guy may be the kind of person who just likes to be by himself. There are those types of people, you know, who are loners.
Then, he just may be shy around women or you in particular. I think he deserves more study. Does he talk with other women?
Or, you could be very brave, and say to him, at an opportune moment, "I really liked talking about my project with you. Would you be interested in consulting with me about that kind of stuff sometimes?" That might open the door.
It is confusing because you are getting mixed messages. And, Larry might think that you and Tom have something going on since he sat between you and Larry.
Take your time and do a Colombo on him! LOL Ann

[freshlylit]

We, for some reason, live in a world where men are expected to be the ones who "break the ice", who ask the big questions like "Will you marry/go out with me?". You've already said that this guy was a quiet shy type of person, so you've gotta expect him to be hard to read (this usually makes them bad at reading signals as well). And if you want him to ask you out, you have to put some really strong signals out there, shy & reserved people don't follow a faint signal. It is too risky.

I am a very reserved person, around everyone, not just females. I'm sure most people I work with would agree that I have some type of social disorder. There is a certain point in which I break through that social awkwardness, and everything flows like it should, but my awkwardness only goes away once the other person has 100% put their guard down. But one thing that I actually noticed after reading your post...------- quick moment in my life ---------

I've had a crush on this girl at my work, can't even bring myself to talk to her (not to mention she is always texting/playing a game on her phone during breaks). Lets say I'm about to talk to a person at work, which would normally consist of at least a little awkwardness, but I realize that she is within earshot, I suddenly am non-awkward and somehow confident sounding. But still I can't talk to, look at or even think about her without getting nervous.

[UnhappyGirl555]

Thanks for the great replies! Everyone at work knows that me and Tom are just good friends and it's pretty obvious that it is that too.. He doesn't talk to anyone a lot actually, not even guys. He's always by himself doing his own things and minding his own business.. I saw one of our female workmates approached him today casually and he didnt really say much to her.. And I caught him looking at me after work today which got me excited! Haha! I wanna approach him, but I don't know how to do that considering he seems pretty reserved and intimidating..

[heartpuff]

I think he likes you secretly.

[Ann S]

I'd approach him and invite him to coffee. See what happens and let us all know! Ann

[UnhappyGirl555]

Alright I will! Thank you for the great replies!

[UnhappyGirl555]

Larry is really getting close to Tom, I encountered a work problem the other day and consulted Tom about it while Larry was there. Before Tom got to answering my question, Larry told me what the problem was and fixed the issue for me. Larry is talking to all my friends but me, and we spoke the other day and he asked for my name which really threw me off because I thought he would know my name! Am I misreading all the signals? He even asked Tom for his contact and asked to hang out anytime after work... I'm starting to think that Larry is interested in my friend Tom.

[michelle23]

If you like him just talk to him a bit more and get to know him better

[srami83]

In highschool I had the biggest crush on a guy named Antonio. Everyone knew he was gay except me I guess. It's a possibility he's into Tom and was eye balling you because you're a threat to his man. The only way to keep from driving yourself crazy is to woman up and ask this fella on a date so you can get to know him better. The worse he could say is thanks but no thanks. Plus you'll always have Tom as your pal.