Lost best friend

[watto]

I split with my ex in late December, we had problems as she wasnt putitng me entirely first i dont mean i am needy but she was like sending me a diary adn saying if you want to arranage anything do it around what i have already booked etc......things got worse and by the end she was just wanting to be with her sister more and more then me. She didnt want to split but couldnt see my point at all and wasnt going to change.
Since then we had a few tiffs, she went out on new years eve and poseted loads pics which seemed to me like she didnt have a care in the world, i was a bit upset and didnt talk. Sadly this went on and on, and now she has a new BF and seems happy.
I have to work with her which makes it hard but i kno realise I have lost my GF and my best friend......i wanted to marry her etc when things were good but seeing and she did me i think before the problems. She now has deleted me on FB and refuses to talk apart from at work...about work. It hard, ive lost everything and maybe should of let her just do what she wanted and book me in when free :-( anything i can do now to cheer up anyway/????

[lamobatsman]

I split with my ex in late December, we had problems as she wasnt putitng me entirely first i dont mean i am needy but she was like sending me a diary adn saying if you want to arranage anything do it around what i have already booked etc......things got worse and by the end she was just wanting to be with her sister more and more then me. She didnt want to split but couldnt see my point at all and wasnt going to change.
Since then we had a few tiffs, she went out on new years eve and poseted loads pics which seemed to me like she didnt have a care in the world, i was a bit upset and didnt talk. Sadly this went on and on, and now she has a new BF and seems happy.
I have to work with her which makes it hard but i kno realise I have lost my GF and my best friend......i wanted to marry her etc when things were good but seeing and she did me i think before the problems. She now has deleted me on FB and refuses to talk apart from at work...about work. It hard, ive lost everything and maybe should of let her just do what she wanted and book me in when free :-( anything i can do now to cheer up anyway/????

she didnt like u much im sorry to say. ur better off without her! ur better than her. its good u put ur foot down and didnt let her book u in whenever she was free. she shudnt treat u like this

[bearz]

I know this sucks, but if she wasn't willing to make any sacrifices for you early on when you were all over each other then it wouldn't have been any different later on in your relationship. She just wasn't that much into it. I wouldn't take it personal if I were you. Keep contact with her to work-related stuff and try to get back out there and meet someone new.

[michelle23]

RUN from anyone who needs to put you on their "to do" list. That is ridiculous. You did the right thing ending it with her. You need to keep busy now and take whatever time you need to heal. You will laugh again, smile again and love again. Each month will get easier. Try to heal in a constructive way by doing things that are good for you like eating well, exercise, focusing on work/study, family and friends. Stay away from alcohol for awhile and women until you are ready

[overanxious]

i had a similar type of situation

my ex couldnt stand to be alone and was so attached to her family that it killed us....she lived with me in my hometown for awhile and would phone them 5 times a day.....instead of getting a job and being responsible she would sit around and wait for me to get home....and she wouldnt get a job so she could use it as a reason to go home for a week or so at a time and work for her dad......

its funny that when her and a her sister both lived at home they fought constantly.....when her sister moved out it was like they were best friends again.....

eventually i moved to her hometown for her thinking that would make things easier...she would be more comfortable....and she got a good job...but that only lasted 6 months before she decided she didnt like it...everyone there was always "out to get her".....and things just got worse...the closer she was to them the more attention and adoration she wanted from them....and it always got in the way of us......

i lost my best friend too....not a day goes by i dont miss her....even though she isnt a good person and is extremely selfish while trying to portray herself as the most selfless person....i dunno it sucks...we were so great once....and i made her my life

[watto]

i am going to the gym it works until i get home and then i am back to feeling rubbish, the thing is she has a BF now! I actually for a few months was quiet happy we had split but as soon as that news got to me (she text me) i was gutted!! I dont know i want to get her out my head but every few minutes thoughts of what we did etc come into my head no matter how hard i try them to not!!
I feel for you overanxious, mine was like that too would get into bed and she would text her mum then her sister every night......then first thing in morning, if we went out on our own she would be texting through a nice meal etc.....really got on my nerves but maybe its me im too clingy. There was incidents when i met her parents for the 2nd time so was going around to meet her first...she text and said ive gone with my sister meet me there!! I was shocked and felt weird as didnt know the parents well!! we would go out for a meal with her family and then back to her folks house, but she wouldnt leave till her sister was ready , the sme when we saw her friends....it was really ridiculous dont you thin? ? ? ?? ? ?

[overanxious]

see i didnt care that she would call or text her family or siblings....mine was a bit deeper than that.....she would get up and do her mothers household chores....she would drive 40 minutes to pick her sister up and bring her to a doctors appointment in their town and then another 40 minutes back to drop her off...when her sister had her own car and isnt sick.....instead of looking for a job or being productive....that kind of crap took priority.....instead of being an adult

[watto]

ahhh right sounds simular though , both exs didnt really have full care for us and our needs. Mine i told about 2 months before we split, and she broke down couldnt breath etc....we tried and tried a few ore times then when it finally went wrong was because i wanted us to go out for new years eve, she eveentually said she wanted to go out with her sister and friends (with me) but i was gutted as it was our first new years eve and wanted it to be special. She snubbed it. So that was it really. Then on new year eve she posted loads ic from the night up, and she looked like she didnt have a care in the world, even though saying a few days before she was devestated etc etc. I dont mind the pics but a bit of tact would been nice. She then at work on the first day back carried on like nothin had happened, she now has a bf even though said it will take ages for her to heal from the pain of losing me. She now wont re-add me to facebook and just says letsdraw a line under us, as if we never happened, i tried to hard took her to so many nice places all thrown back in my face.....troube is she is to be a director int he future i am screwed

[Dixon]

Hi Watto,
She was not of your type and sorry for being harsh but she didn't love you. As she found another guy and happy with him then why don't you search for some other girl? There are lots of online dating sites which are doing great job and people from reasonable families are members of such sites. Just give it a try man!

http://www.datingdownunder.com.au/Da...20an%20STD.htm

[watto]

i am trying and failing on these sites! I realise she didnt love me but the thought of me she just ents to settle down and have kids with someone. It is hard nad thats what hurts as i can tell she didnt love me and i thought she did

[michelle23]

You need to accept its over and then you will slowly start to heal

[overanxious]

watto...for the most part my ex loved my attention...loved doing things with me....we used to go kayaking...or just spending a day sitting out at the lake listening to music and stuff like that....

but about a month before we broke up....her cousins and aunt/uncle were up to visit for a week....she is so incessant on making everyone think shes the coolest/funnest/best....the entire week she spent with them while i worked......so on a sunday night i wanted her to come over and make some dinner and watch a movie with me....well her brother and cousins were going 40 minutes away to see a movie....i was invited but didnt feel like it as i had to work 10 hours the next day.....i just wanted some alone time with her....and i told her it pissed me off...i said "i need you sometimes ya know...im up here without any friends or family".....i told her i was going to go home and that i was going to change my relationship status on fb....kind of childish....but i was upset...i think it was right then and there she decided she had enough i even though she played it out longer....sometimes i wanted my needs to be met.....and some girls just arent capable thats all...i dont think it means there wasnt any genuine love....some girls just want to be able to do whatever they want and not have you question it....yer just supposed to take it all in and still love them and not bring up your issues.....thats just how it is(i saw the same behavior in my exs parents)

i remember one night about a month before that incident....i checked the local theatre schedule out and asked her "do you want to go see magic mike"...haha...i knew she wanted to see it and would be excited that id even go...she was so excited....we had already eaten so we went to this place for dessert....she held my hand the entire time....she was so happy.....unfortunately you cant make that stuff last forever i guess

its tough because i have girls that want to go out with me....and most of them have what she doesnt...the ability to be independent and responsible....im afraid though they cant give me the other stuff she did that i liked....im afraid that none of them can match her beauty, charm, and intensity that our relationship seemed to have had for awhile...even though there were ugly parts....its scary...id like to have a little of both....but i am afraid future relationships might not compare and i might measure them up....

[watto]

dont give up over anxious.....its hard though i know. I think me and my ex were different people, ive made an error tonight and been on FB and seen my ex with her bf (and sister suprise suprise) but they all look really happy. He actually looks like someone who should be with her and not me, im more into nights out etc , they are both into sight seeing at churches etc. IT still hurts as i love her and work with her but what can you do, we spoke today but only about random things, she looked so awkward talking to me