Why Are 'Bad Boys' So Appealing?

[lovemax4u]

In the context of dating, "bad boy" conjures images from the '50s-the guy with the motorcycle, leather jacket, cigarettes and thick air of mystery. He's the guy parents didn't approve of, the one friends tsk-tsked about while they secretly swooned. But in reality, every generation has its own version of the "bad boy"-or, rather, many versions of him. And plenty of women will be attracted, for the wrong reasons and with disastrous results.



First, let's be clear that this isn't about a man who is unconventional, risk taking, and doesn't even own a button-down shirt. Being a "bad boy" is never about appearances. Instead, it's about a man who's "bad" because he's "bad" for you, and you probably already know it-whether because he's a known womanizer, engages in dangerous, illegal or immoral activities, is physically or verbally abusive, or any number of other reasons that tell you deep down you should not be wasting your energy on this guy.
So why do women do it?

To begin with, to be fair, sometimes it's difficult to see the bad boy for who he really is. Say you're dating a guy who just can't hang onto a job; you'd like to think (as he likely does) it's because he's simply too talented/artistic/misunderstood to get along with his employers. But maybe the truth is that he has a poor work ethic and larger-than-life ego... and is used to finding women (like you!) who will happily take care of him until the perfect job appears. Eventually-but the sooner the better-you're going to have to figure out if the guy you're dating is an eccentric late bloomer or just a guy with an oversized sense of entitlement.

Another reason some women are drawn to these guys is because they believe they can fix them. A classic example is the woman who's convinced she'll be the one who turns a world-class womanizer into a committed monogamist. This could be because she's naïve, or it could be that he's just so darn charming. In spite of his reputation, this kind of bad boy is an expert at making whomever he's with at the time believe she's the one. But it's that very charm you have to watch out for, because you might be one in a long line of the "most beautiful and interesting" women in his world. Of course, you shouldn't always take someone's reputation at face value-the stories of his womanizing could be coming from someone with an axe to grind or just a passion for gossip-but if the signs are there, don't ignore them. You're simply putting off the inevitable heartache of finding out the hard way that you're not his one and only.

Finally, some women are attracted to bad boys simply because they are bad boys. They love the thrill of stepping out of their comfort zone, shocking their friends or even rebelling against their horrified parents. In this situation, the wisdom of dating this guy depends on your motive. On the one hand, there's nothing wrong with taking a walk on the wild side if your expectations are realistic and you just want to have a good time (within reason; of course you should walk away if he ever involves you in a dangerous or inappropriate situation of any kind). On the other hand, just trying to get a rise out of disapproving family or friends, is a downright terrible reason to date someone. It may well work in terms of getting them riled up-and even getting you a little extra attention, which can hold appeal of its own-but if you get serious about this person and he's truly wrong for you, you're the one who will pay the price, not them.

[VincenzoG91]

I think there are two basic reasons why women are drawn to bad boys.

1. Sometimes something seems sexier just because it is forbidden.

2. Immature women are unable to discern the difference between assertive men and bad boys.

[HeheMan]

"Bad boys" are appealing to immature women who can't tell the difference between

Arrogance and Confidence
Selfishness and Assertiveness
etcetc

Women who figure it out in their early 20's stand a good chance of happiness in life. Unfortunately in America today there are many women who are in their early to mid 30's and are just now figuring it out and wondering why they can't find a man to marry (hint: you're 35)

[Starnique]

The same reason why some good boys like bad girls. They like the challenge. They like to feel like they can be the difference in the persons life. I dont necessarily like bad boys but I do like a guy with some challenge to him. I dont want a pushover.

[YoungCosmo]

Because broads have ****ing mental problems and need to be treated like shit to win them over. Must have inferiority complexes, which would explain the deliberate seeking of abuse: because these ****ing broads think all they deserve is abuse.

[HeheMan]

Guys like bad girls for the crazy sex.

[YoungCosmo]

So these women should be arrested for aiding criminals, then...

[BackUpOrGetStng]

Women like bad boys for a few reasons. They are okay with doing what they want, without concern for what others think. Hot girls are approached daily by guys willing to give them the world, just because they're pretty. People who don't cater to them are attractive to them because they're different.

[stev123]

because they are sloots u ****ing faggots

[michelle23]

Women who are attracted to these guys are normally self destructive in some way. It could be for a number of different reasons

1/. Low self esteem-insecurity (thinking they cant do any better)
2/. After a bad breakup-heartbroken (they find someone bad in the hope they wont fall in love)
3/. Attracted to drama-enjoys the stress, fights, worry and depression. (some people actually like being
4/. Bad male role model- they say women go for guys similar to their dad or older brothers. Its what thknow so if their dad was an ass-they may end up with a loser too
5/. People who have had a bad childhood, lots of bad experiences eg. Physically abused for years-may stay with the wrong person just because he doesnt hit her but she lets him get away with all sorts of other crap.

Theres prob more reasons but i think women who go for men like that have issues. Ive never gone for the "bad boy" iv always had good taste in men.

[pcmaster]

Because bad guys dont give shit about girls and they love it when guy is not a pussy and dont put up with crap letting women roll over him. Because bad boys stand up for themself and are not desperate.
Because girls want to be CHOSEN. Girls like to be chosen from other girls but not be like one and only because guy have no other options. In other words girls like guys who take what they need from them and dont waste their time. Someone who is not afraid to be himslef and not afraid to hurt her instead putting her on the pedestal and acting like a peasant.
Because they are not running after girls but letting girls run after them. Cause they dont give away love so easy, they have worth instead of commiting to first girl who likes them.

Yeah maybe they want to save them make them a good guys. Make them soft and sweet instead of wild and rebelious.

[fearoflove]

I have never understood their appeal.

[basilandthyme]

I also have never understood their appeal. I've always dated 'nice guys'

[fearoflove]

Who the hell thanked me for that post?

[dickriculous]

1) Element of the forbidden - no denying how sexy this is. It's in our blood to be drawn to it.

2) Some women get bored of guys who aren't capable of ever saying no to her or standing up to her, etc. Bad boys are a pleasant relief from said boredom.

3) The definition of "bad-boy" isn't black and white. I've heard some guys I considered to be pretty upstanding referred to as "bad boys" or "jerks" because they weren't white knights who are willing to saw their balls off for a pretty girl's affection. It's like so many people have no idea that the vast majority of us are somewhere in between those two extremes.

4) Like you said, domesticating a philanderer or badass or whatever is an extremely seductive lure for many women.

5) A lot of women don't like to admit this but if we're being realistic, a guy who fukks her real good is going to get away with a lot more than a guy who can't fukk worth shit so there's a lot of cases where a guy who's really good in bed treats his girl badly and she puts up with it because of what a great source of pleasure he is - I've seen this one go both ways quite a lot.

6) Some people grow up being treated badly by their family and it becomes ingrained into them to the point where it seems normal to them and being treated nicely freaks them out and may cause them to turn the other way.