How much do you think the experience of love changes as you grow up?

[jennifer.c]

I'm pretty sure most people will agree that there's a certain feeling involved in teenage romances (the younger, the more intense) that's pretty unique to the age. And a lot of times the love interest totally isn't right, and the relationship might seem shallow or silly, but it's still this insane butterfly / fireworks / giddy sort of deal.

I'm wondering if anybody, as an adult with a fair amount of dating experience, has still felt this sort of thing with a new partner? I'm beginning to think it's not totally possible for me anymore (even though I'm still really young), and while that's okay because the main important thing is compatibility and a deeper connection, it would be a little disappointing. I haven't felt "butterflies in my stomach" in years. I get nostalgic for the feeling, even though my most meaningful relationships have happened since then.

So do you think it's just a thing that goes along with being young and inexperienced, or would you consider it to be an important part of a relationship?

[michelle23]

Its called infatuation. Everyone experiences when falling for someone new-no matter what age you are. Look up the 9 stages of love. Infatuation is the first stage and the bond/emotional attachment does not start to grow until you reach stage two. You can be infatuated by a person you have never met, never kissed, the infatuation could last 10 years if your really stupid. Its a fantasy, a daydream-dreaming up a life with this person in your head, thinking he/she is everything you want them to be.. Its not real though.

The real love starts when you open your eyes, stop daydreaming and really get to know the real person

I have never been infatuated by someone as I dont allow myself to be. I want to know the real person before letting my emotions take over. Maybe you are just cautious like me and I think that is a good thing

[vashti]

The last time I felt that way about a man was when I was 33, and prior to that, only one other time. I do not expect I will feel it again.

[smackie9]

I'm pretty sure most people will agree that there's a certain feeling involved in teenage romances (the younger, the more intense) that's pretty unique to the age. And a lot of times the love interest totally isn't right, and the relationship might seem shallow or silly, but it's still this insane butterfly / fireworks / giddy sort of deal.

I'm wondering if anybody, as an adult with a fair amount of dating experience, has still felt this sort of thing with a new partner? I'm beginning to think it's not totally possible for me anymore (even though I'm still really young), and while that's okay because the main important thing is compatibility and a deeper connection, it would be a little disappointing. I haven't felt "butterflies in my stomach" in years. I get nostalgic for the feeling, even though my most meaningful relationships have happened since then.

So do you think it's just a thing that goes along with being young and inexperienced, or would you consider it to be an important part of a relationship?

Yes it can happen. When I was dating, some times I met someone that made me feel like I was 16 again. Depending on opportunity, yes you can have those feelings with someone new at any age....it will depend on who, where, when.....and getting caught up in the moment, and being vulerable doesn't always mean disastrous results.....you will learn that as you get older. Nothing wrong with throwing caution into the wind because you can't expect change unless you are willing to take risks........if your heart gets broken so what....it's not the end of the world....you just move on.

[jennifer.c]

Thanks all, I definitely agree that it's not the most important part (I'm taking liberties with the word "love"), but I do think it might be a little different than normal infatuation. I've been infatuated without feeling that.

Maybe it has to do with not being nervous about it anymore? I just started kind of seeing someone that I like a ton and we get on really great and I'm attracted to him, but I haven't gotten any of those "feelings" at all. I'm hoping that doesn't matter.

But it's still good to hear that some of you were able to feel that again. It's exhilarating