So torn, Advice please!

[Stephie597]

Lets start things off easy. I have been with the same man for 3 years, we have two children together. One is 3 and the other is 10 months. Although he is the only one i have been with for these years, regretfully I am not his only one. He has slept with 2 other women (that i know of) and i continue to catch him texting other females. He turns this around on me, saying that I am insecure whenever i am to say anything about it. There are quite a few more problems, i will leave unattended. Although i love this man, with every part of me..leaving him to me makes me feel as if I am breaking our family apart. I am so torn on what to do, does this man even really love me anymore? Or am i simply his comfort zone?

[namemyname]

We need more details.

Who are these women he is texting? What is he texting about?

And did he sleep with these 2 women during your relationship? Or before you?

And it's hard to comment if there are other issues you're not mentioning. If you'd like real advice, please post more of your situation.

[bcgirl]

Yes, we need more info. Hard to give advice on such a sensitive topic like breaking apart a family when we have nothing to go by

[basilandthyme]

Please tell us about the other problems. And tell us what the texting of other women is about. Breaking up a family is a big deal and can't be done lightly.

[michelle23]

if he is a cheat-i would leave him. id rather be alone than be with a man i dont trust-kids or no kids. you can still be good parents if your a part. you deserve a man who is just as loyal as you are. i know its hard to break up a family but all this stress and upset aint good for them either. there not stupid-they sense the tension and observe everything around them. im sure theyd rather see you smile more

[Stephie597]

Here is the full story. We met in Feb 2010, and instantly clicked and fell in love within a month or so. We had so much in common, and the chemistry between us was unreal. We told each other everything, including our pasts. Including him telling me that he is a recovering drug addict, although he had been clean for over a year before we met. I accepted that. A year and a half into our relationship, he ran into the wrong people, and began drugs again. He left me and my family hanging dry, without so much as a kiss my butt. Me pregnant, without work, or any source of income at the time. So me and the kids also lost the house he had together. He was initially as you would say "strung out" for over a year off and on..Me continuing to stay by his side when we would come around needing someone who truly cared during his hard time.This is when he slept with the other two females. We talked through this and i helped him through his drug addiction (not knowing really what to do other than be there for him since i had never been through this before). He remained clean, and we got another place together..and began to raise our family together. Until he started to show the same traits as he did before when he was doing drugs, i confronted him, and come to find out he had been doing them for months and hiding it from me.(This is when he was texting another female..nothing sexual..but gave her his number after her telling him she thought he was attractive. Calling each other babe, talking about spending time together..and cooking for one another) We went through this for quite a while until finally he got help, and became clean once again.. Through all of this i have been by his side. Always being the one to forgive. Until 4 nights ago his phone was going off while he was asleep on the couch..curiosity got the best of me and i found, he had been texting his ex. Same things being said really..calling each other babe..being flirty. When i confront him this time he tells me i am being insecure.. and need to see whom is the one he falls asleep with every night. Im the only one he wants blah blah. Regardless, these things make me feel like crap. Trying to turn it all around on me. He does not really ever assist with the kids..as i have been the only one to get up with our son since he has been born..the only one to feed him or change him. He plays with him occasionally and that is enough for him to love his father to death..as well as our little girl..I love this man too. But is it really worth all the pain he is constantly causing me?