Paranoid ugh!

[jennat]

Okay guys! I'm sure when you hear about my problem I'm sure you'll just laugh and think I'm dumb and stupid. I've liked this guy (let's call him "Joe") for quite a bit now and right now we're talking a lot and we're very close since we're in the same group of close friends. There are a lot of signs that he does like me and that he's just not too sure about how he feels yet to make more of a move like ask me out. Just yesterday we hung out with some of our friends and I'm even more sure about this. The problem is I just end up being really paranoid and jealous sometimes for dumb reasons. The thing is my friends made plans for all of us to hang out tomorrow night including one of my other best friends who really doesn't hang out with that group much. I don't know why but I'm always paranoid and jealous about her and "Joe" even though I have no reason to be. She's one of my closest friends for 5 years and she knows how I feel, and I trust her and know she would do nothing to mess up my thing with this guy. I wouldn't even mind it if I was going to be hanging out with all my friends tomorrow too but I cant make it there. Since I'm not there, I get worried about what will happen or if he will grow closer to her or like her. I don't know what I'm basing this off of other than the fact that he jokes around with her just like he does with other girls he's friends with. IT's absolutely stupid and maybe its because I just need a reason to worry EVEN THOUGH I REALLY DONT HAVE ANY RIGHT to be jealous since we're not official or anything. And anyway I trust both of them but I'm scared. I know its going to be a bunch of people and that they probably wont even talk to each other much except possibly during the hour they all spend eating together and that you don't talk during movies and they wont sit by each other anyway. And yes I understand this sounds extremely stupid and that I'm being completely paranoid but I just need something to reassure me that I don't have to be worried.

[michelle23]

will you just take the initiative and ask her out.

[smackie9]

You mean ask him out lol.

[smackie9]

He chooses who he chooses and there isn't anything you can do about it. Just because you feel "close" to him doesn't mean he is interested in dating you......if he was you would think he would confide in someone in your group. You need to keep your feelings in check before you get yourself hurt, or drive yourself crazy with jealousy when you see him just being himdself with other women.

[pacachomp]

Nah, Michelle's right (except about the gender). There's no easy way to fix the paranoia, it sounds like you really like Joe and worry that you're not good enough for him in comparison to your friend. The best way to go is to ask him out yourself. Trust me, guys love it when girls take the initiative. If he says yes, it eases your paranoia and you get what you want. If he says no, you haven't really lost anything; it will hurt for a while, but at some point you'll have to experience that pain anyway if he isn't interested, and you can move past the paranoia.

Let us know how it works out, good luck