i talk about the future to much

[david.lee634]

i love my girlfriend. she is amazing. we have talked about the future, about getting married and stuff but we know we have a bit to go before that actually happens. We do see each other being married though, but we have also talked about what would happen if one of us decided to end it. We are almost like best friends and also dating and we would wanna really keep the friendship if we split up.

Sometimes I sit and think about the future and what will happen and then I talk to her about it. Sometimes I think I talk about it to much. She never seems annoyed but I just wanna go with the flow and play it cool. I just have never been with a girl that I'm crazy about like this.

Any help on how I can just play it cool

[LifeInflux]

You have to change the way you think. So much can happen in the future, and as Robert Burns once wrote, "The best laid plans of mice and men often go astray."


In life, marriages fail and relationships go in unexpected routes, I've had my fair share as well, yet not a single one of us wishes a relationship would turn from the happy moments we cherish to the sad depressing moments of parting ways -- but it happens, and no foresight is capable of seeing it.


So my advice is to change your view of the future to your view of the present. (or near future at least).


Grow the bond you two share now by making immediate plans. Not - "I can see us getting married in 5 years" instead - "Lets go on a cruise next month." enjoy the time you have together now, and instead of planning the future, you're living the future.


Next thing you know, you won't be talking about getting married, you'll be getting ready to propose, and you'll wonder where all that time you "planned for" went.


And -- in the event things don't work out, you won't be nearly as crushed because that life you foresaw didn't happen the way you intended. Don't get your hopes up, and you'll be happily surprised when good things happen.

[michelle23]

stop worrying so much. you have no idea what your life will be like a year from now. anything could happen. just enjoy what you have together. you sound young and im guessing this is a new relationship? if you and she are still together in 2 or 3 years and still happy-you can put a ring on her finger then. right now just focus on the present, enjoy what you have. theres nothing wrong with mentioning the future ocassionally "i hope we get married one day" for example but dont make promises that you may not be able to keep.

also stop talking about what will happen if you break up. staying friends is unrealistic as it would be too painful for at least one of you so scratch that idea.

just enjoy each other and have fun