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Thread: "complicated" vagina

  1. #16
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    I doubt it. If she doesn't know her own body then how can she tell him anything.

  2. #17
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    From my own experience- me and my bf only figured out gspot a year ago annd were together 5years.. Before that, it was always just clit orgasms.

    My suggestion is to take it one step at a time. First ask her to explore her own body. Then after awhile figure out how to make her orgasm with your hands, then oral, then sex, then gspot, then you could ask her to try anal and so on.. Dont move onto something new until you have figured out how to make her orgasm each way.

    Only have sex after she cums or after trying to make her cum first for awhile.

    I think this is the best way to learn and it keeps things interesting for ages. Me and my bf are still trying new things which always keeps us hot for each other.

    Just recently i asked him to cum on me-like on my boobs and belly which is something he never asked for but little things like that-can really be a huge turn on after being together for so long.

    Again he only started cuming inside me a year ago which is now a huge turn on for the both of us.

    Little new things every six months or so really add to the spark
    "Don't ask a question if you can't handle the answer".

  3. #18
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    Quote Originally Posted by smackie9 View Post
    I doubt it. If she doesn't know her own body then how can she tell him anything.
    He's not listening to us is what I meant so how can he even listen to her. You tell him to let her experiment alone and I tell him how he can stimulate her clitoris in the rubbing motion that she's used to and the first thing he comes back with is: Does anyone know of any toys I can show her? WTF?

    Anyway.. OP: (without giving away TMI or personal information about our sex life: No don't show her any toys, buy her the book "Sex for One" and talk to her about changing up her mastabatory habits so that she can orgasm in other ways. If she doesn't want to change it up and you can't wrap your head around not being able to get her off.. then you're not compatible so why stay with her while YOU feel inadequate. Maybe you should try to wrap your head around her standart way of orgasming a little more too?
    Last edited by Wakeup; 11-08-13 at 11:50 PM.
    “The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs.” ~Joan Didion

  4. #19
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    I'm not a fan of direct clitoral stimulation. But, prefer penetration. It's all about the build up for me. It's a big turn off to just have fingers jammed inside of me or someone sucking on my clit for 10 minutes. Yikes.

  5. #20
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    It's possible she doesn't want to "change" her habits.

  6. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by paze View Post
    She's 27 years old with multiple previous partners, time is not going to teach her to orgasm
    Uh, yes it is. Just because she's 27 and with multiple previous partners doesn't necessarily mean she is an expert on her own orgasms.

    Personally I think she has been made to feel ashamed as a kid for masturbating, so now she is ashamed to reach orgasm in front of you via any other means than the one she knows (see what happened with the anus stimulation incident - she was really enjoying it but then she felt ashamed and made you stop). That's why she said she has never had so many orgasms with a man before - she actually feels more sexually comfortable with you than with any other guy. This is a good thing.

    I think she should learn how to reach orgasm on her own without using a blanket or pillow or anything - just her fingers. She should break down those psychological barriers and start experimenting. Until she is comfortable with her own self, there's nothing you can do.

  7. #22
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    I'm just gonna throw out there that it took a guy with experience and skill to teach me how to have a clitoral orgasm. I think I could have pfaffed around forever down there and not figured it out myself.
    Never regret anything that has happened in your life. It cannot be changed, forgotten or undone. So, take it as a lesson learned and move on.

  8. #23
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    OP is she happy with the way it is now and you really haven't told her that you want a different experience with her?

  9. #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by smackie9 View Post
    OP is she happy with the way it is now and you really haven't told her that you want a different experience with her?
    She is happy, but I've been with other women who had way more intense orgasms than her, so I believe she can be happier whether she realizes it or not.

    I have not told her that I want a different experience and I'm not really 'chasing' a different experience and focusing on that. I'm enjoying our sex-life immensely and I make sure to tell her that. Every day that goes by, she feels more comfortable around me. All I want is for her to enjoy it as much as me, and for our sexual spark to never vanish.

    Quote Originally Posted by searock View Post
    Uh, yes it is. Just because she's 27 and with multiple previous partners doesn't necessarily mean she is an expert on her own orgasms.

    Personally I think she has been made to feel ashamed as a kid for masturbating, so now she is ashamed to reach orgasm in front of you via any other means than the one she knows (see what happened with the anus stimulation incident - she was really enjoying it but then she felt ashamed and made you stop). That's why she said she has never had so many orgasms with a man before - she actually feels more sexually comfortable with you than with any other guy. This is a good thing.

    I think she should learn how to reach orgasm on her own without using a blanket or pillow or anything - just her fingers. She should break down those psychological barriers and start experimenting. Until she is comfortable with her own self, there's nothing you can do.
    Thanks. This message made me feel very good and more secure about myself. Thank you very much.

  10. #25
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    OP just give it time. If this is a new relationship it could take awhile for her to fully open up sexually with you. It took time for me with my bf and now we explore all the time and it keeps getting better and better. I really blossomed with him when we started living together and didnt have to worry about being heard or someone walking in anymore etc. I then asked him to try different types of orgasms and really wanted to try all sorts of new things.

    Just be patient and have fun. You have all the time in the world. Dont compare her to others. I know my own body really well which is y i find it so easy to orgasm with my bf. Some women have a really hard time figuring out what works for them and its harder for you to figure it kut if she doesnt know. Just stick with what shes comfortable with for now and you could buy her a toy to explore with on her own.
    .
    good luck
    "Don't ask a question if you can't handle the answer".

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