She's getting real heavy (not physically)

[j-white]

I've had a new girlfriend for about a month now and we happen to work together.

She has her friends and I have mine so we were sitting separately on our lunches, but she sent me a message saying how she feels bad when we're not sitting together. I recently started going for my breaks and sitting with her for a chat as we don't see each other in work very often.

I've been staying with her a lot and we got into a discussion on how it would be nice to live together, just a silly chat, nothing unusual in that.
I own a house but have no intention of raising a family in as it's in a bad area, my plan is to get it fixed up so I can rent it out.
She's suddenly taken to calling me her 'whole world' and told me I must get this house sorted soon so I can rent it out and move in with her, she gave me two months!
I told her it's going to take me a fair bit longer than that, "okay three months, no more".

I'm 29 now, I feel like I want to find a nice woman to get settled with and have kids (she already said we'll have at least 2 O.o) and she is a wonderful girl (she's 23) and seems like she would be good to settle with.

I've gotten used to my time alone though and the heavy talk frightens me a little! Also when spending so much time together in work as well the conversation's a little strained in my opinion.

Am I just being a commitment-phobe and need to relax or what?
Just wondering what input you guys have, what your experiences are etc.

[michelle23]

This is the honeymoon phase. people daydream all the time about marriage and babies during this stage. They are not promises-just dreams "one day when I do get married, it could be with you which would be nice" etc Don't take it literally. You could break up in 6 months time. Nothing is set in stone in the first year so you should take your time.

She is moving too fast though. Tell her you have no intention of living together so soon. Plus you will need to be together at least a year or two and living together to get to know each other properly and suss out if you are compatible for marriage or not.

You just need to put your foot down and say no. Tell her you don't think its a good idea to live together in the first year and its not gonna happen.

[pcmaster]

Well it depends on you man. Dont take her too seriously shes just 23 and you should be brains of relationship. I dont think its too fast to live together. People been living together after knowing eachother just few weeks. Thats actually good way to see if you are are able to tolerate eachother.

If you get tired from talking with her then dont talk about serious stuff. make sure you keep eye contact and shes right in front of you and touch her sometimes. In this way you wont lose energy when talking. And leave it at the best - dont talk for hours until theres nothing to say anymore but leave her at the peak of conversation. In this way she will always get good impresion about you and she will wantg to see you more and more. Its not a bad idea to rent a house cause you can use this spontaneos energy from relationship to change your life a bit. If you like her she will be like fuel to your dreams and goals.

And if you feel like shes taking too much of your time then 3 days a week is ussualy common practice to spend together and rest of the time you can be busy with your stuff. In this way you wont give her too much value which is importand. If you work together then at least spend weekends seperatly.