Girls - Where do you think I stand with her?

[fmfan08]

So we've been flirting through text/phone and that. Recently I texted her a joke saying "Going to rob a bank, want to drive or shoot?" and she replied instantly when we both texted.

However, I overly teased her, acted competitive and made a dig at her driving meaning she ended the conversation saying "You do that then, night".

The following morning I complimented her on her driving skills and that we'd make the "perfect bank robbing team" ending the text with "do I get my gorgeous partner in crime back?"

Conversation went like this:

Her - So smooth.. Do you say this to all the girls?
Me - No I don't. Do you want me to say it to other girls?
Her - I wouldn't know if you did would I
(next day)
Me - How about we play getting to know each other instead? Ladies first!
Her - I'm at work until 12 so can't

Anyway, I acknowledged her being at work but asked her if something was up, as she was acting grumpy lately.

She didn't reply, so the next day I told her that I told her my joke came out wrong and I didn't mean it offensively. Also that I don't go calling every girl I meet gorgeous. Then ended the text with "sorry x".

15 minutes later I got a super long text saying :

"I'm so sorry.. I don't want you to think you need to be sorry. I'm sorry if I've been grumpy I'm just snowed under with exams and stuff and been working so much, I don't have time for anything. I don't want you to think you've done anything wrong at all! By Sunday I'll be all done and free to speak to you.. I'm sorry xxxxx"

(I knew she was busy with work and had an exam Friday)

What I want to know is.. should I keep pursuing and getting to know her whilst keeping other options open? We haven't met. Or does she see me as a friend with that reply? I'm confused where I stand!

[smackie9]

You are just a "possible" interest for now and she will make that decision after you finally meet if she wants to pursue something more. For now, she isn't going to invest too much until that happens.

[fmfan08]

You are just a "possible" interest for now and she will make that decision after you finally meet if she wants to pursue something more. For now, she isn't going to invest too much until that happens.

I suppose that's obvious still technically being strangers. She's complimented my looks and when we've been getting to know each other, she's been intrigued with what I say. Her questions have been about what my ideal girl would be, how many people have I slept with, etc. She'd respond with 6-7 lines or so.

Although I noticed when she was being off with me (I'm still convinced it's because I overly teased her), I saw her tweet this: http://i.qkme.me/3r9o8y.jpg (from her favorite show) then her tweets looked like she was trying to make it look like she was really happy with life, etc.

But yeah, wasn't sure on the big apology. Still worth pursuing?

[smackie9]

That is up to you.

[pcmaster]

I think she saying truth about being busy. But you have to decide wether these time leftowers are enought for you or not.

[fmfan08]

That is up to you.

I suppose I have nothing to lose if I pursue other girls too. I'm keeping a potential chance open with her if contact is open. I just can't have all my eggs in one basket, otherwise it could be a waste of time.

[smackie9]

Have you asked her out on a date yet?

[fmfan08]

Have you asked her out on a date yet?

I insisted about getting to know her in person a couple of weeks ago, but she said 'i never know what I want'. I assumed that was a sign of no interest, so I acted blunt and short, making it look like I was backing off.

She said "That wasn't the case" and that for the first time in about a year she's felt in a place where she could move on if she wanted to because her ex has finally left her alone, but she "just doesn't know what she wants". Then I remember her texting saying "I don't want to make promises I can't keep. But I do want to get to know you.."

I did act irrational though, she joked by calling me a "woman".

I don't know whether it was an excuse or she meant it, but her ex had been pissing her off lately.

She seemed a bit timid about the idea of meeting originally because I was a "stranger" in her eyes and that she would prefer to get to know me more first, etc.

[Ginger2013]

I think the whole problem with the texting/flirting thing is that you can't read the other person's true mood or emotions. It's too easy to misconstrue anything that's typed as opposed to things said in person. You two haven't met yet, and until you do, you won't know what kind of person the other is really. I think you should go on a date, get to know each other, then judge if she's right for you or if you should keep your options open.

[smackie9]

She is just using you for the attention. She has no real romantic interest, just friends.....yes keep looking else where.....especially if the ex is still somewhere in the picture. That would be my cue to leave it.

[fmfan08]

She is just using you for the attention. She has no real romantic interest, just friends.....yes keep looking else where.....especially if the ex is still somewhere in the picture. That would be my cue to leave it.

What makes you say that?

She said she'd be free to talk to after Sunday but part of me feels like not initiating again. Although I have been jumping to conclusions with her lately, it's not exactly the best formula for meeting up.

Part of me is tempted to tell her straight about not wanting to be used for attention, maybe to satisfy my ego.. but then again I could be wrong, she might just be scared to meet.

[smackie9]

If she is scared to meet then it's a bust anyways. You want to be with someone who knows what they want and are confident in themselves to go after what they want. She is too wishy washy to bother with. There is no point in calling her out on it she will just give you more lame excuses.

If a girl is really into you she will never let anything get in the way to be with you. This girl isn't THAT into you.


Dude I have seen enough threads started with guys getting the run around with girls...your story is nothing new.

[fmfan08]

If she is scared to meet then it's a bust anyways. You want to be with someone who knows what they want and are confident in themselves to go after what they want. She is too wishy washy to bother with. There is no point in calling her out on it she will just give you more lame excuses.

If a girl is really into you she will never let anything get in the way to be with you. This girl isn't THAT into you.


Dude I have seen enough threads started with guys getting the run around with girls...your story is nothing new.

True, but it was in the run up to a lot of exams she had to sit and her ex annoying her. Not trying to make excuses for her.

I have been annoying to her recently though, maybe pushing a little bit and telling her that I assumed she wasn't interested, jumping to conclusions, etc. That was probably the wrong time to ask her out, maybe that's why she avoided it.

Whilst keeping my options open, I would like to see how the next week or two goes with constant POSITIVE contact, then asking her out on a higher note. If I get the same excuse, then you're right.

Not sure if I've mentioned it, but I HAVEN'T met her before. We've been talking online, texting and phoning, using snapchat, etc.

[smackie9]

You should always set a deadline when it comes to things like this....if nothing happens in 2 weeks stop wasting your time.