what am i doing

[confusedlady12]

Hello,

first time on here, not sure what to do really. here goes:
so I have been with the lad for 2 years just over, we rushed into it very quickly and we was living together at my friends house within 3 months or so, then we moved to his mums then coming up to a year together we moved into a rented place of our own. we soon broke up and got rid of the house, for 2 weeks he was still sleeping with me and playing me and I went with it, we finally got back together and within around 1 month he was staying at my friends with me most nights. we did argue a lot and then when we realised the faults, which apparently was me being too clingy, we was fine. we have since moved back to his mums so we could save more money for holidays etc together. We have been on a holiday we jointly paid for and recently got a new car which we both pay towards, this is something I thought was a step up and sign on commitment.

this is the problem. I feel sometimes he is only with me for the sake of it. We argue occasionally, but then we seem to be fine. I have seen my error of ways. I always seemed to moan at him when he was out with his mates, and since we have discussed it I now don't moan at him and hardly even speak to him when hes out with out me. He though never seems to be in the wrong... he is golden boy.
he has often threatened to hit me, whilst he never has this upsets me and gets me down. he never compliments me, I used to be a nice size 8 with a nice figure, whereas now I am a larger 12/14 and have stretch marks at the age of 20 without having kids!!!! disgusting, and gets me down anyway. he always compliments people on the tele and sometimes makes comments aboujt people in the street, only when other people are with us though. I sometimes send him pictures of myself in a sexual content and messages, to try and spice our bedroom area up, yet I get moaned at for doing it says its boring, but then moans our sex life is boring. I seem to think its my appearance and that he doesn't find me attractive anymore but when confronted he kjust argues and doesn't give me an answer. I feel disgusting as it is and he makes me even more paranoid and less confident about myself.

I don't even know if he really does love me still or if eh is just with me for the sake of being with me a habit. I don't know what to do, I always seem to be in the wrong and whenever I try talk to him he threatens to leave me or argues with me. I am getting really down about it but I love him to much and I need some advice.

thanks

[smackie9]

Sorry for the bad feelings but it's going this way...you need to get out of this relationship. The weight gain, and arguing just means this relationship has expired and you both are just unsatisfied with each other. If he truly loved you he would be supportive, but he is a typical young guy, and he didn't bargain for an over weight needy GF, nor did you bargain for an non supportive, negative BF. Sometimes a relationship just runs it's course, you are not their for each other anymore and it's just falling apart. The best and healthiest thing to do is to get out of it. Once you are out of it, you will realize how unsatisfying the relationship truly was, and you will feel good about yourself not being in it anymore.

[TablesandChairs]

Sometimes people gain weight because they're compensating - they're unhappy, have no zest for life and feel emotionally crippled. They eat to cope through it. I'd say your relationship is pretty toxic for you and it might be manifesting physically.

But, my dear, you have some issues you really need to sort out. He's threatening to hit you and you're sticking around? What more does he need to say or do? You need to get the hint and stop clinging onto a man who doesn't want you. It'll ruin your self esteem more and more.