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Thread: My EX and I have been hooking up for two years. I need a way out, please help.

  1. #1
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    My EX and I have been hooking up for two years. I need a way out, please help.

    I am going to condense this story a bit so you all know my situation in a nutshell. I met my Ex in 2011 and at that time I was 20. During the beginning of our relationship I was his " Booty Call" but I was too naive to see it ( since I hadn't been in that situation before). Needless to say, we stopped talking ( he was seeing a new girl) for about a week; when he decided he missed me and wanted to commit into a full on relationship. We moved in together for about 6 months, where he ended up leaving the party life and focused on us. I ended up moving out for personal reasons later. That's when I became insecure and real clingy, because I knew deep down he was going to brake up with me ( which he did). A few months later we settled for just hooking up, but deep down I' ve always wanted more and he knows that. To him, however, it's only sex. Almost two years later we are still calling each other when we are lonely, and hookup for comfort. I' ve lost his respect in this situation, and I just can't seem to gain it back. I want to leave this toxic non-existing relationship, but every time I do he comes back for more. I just fall back into this routine, that deep down only hurts me more. A part of me thinks he'll come around, and maybe he'll realize there's more to us. He never gave us a chance, he just went straight to the single life partying and being with low-class women. In the other hand, I waited finished my degree as an RN, and thought maybe he would want to be with someone with more aspirations now that he's 28. I am turning 23 in a few months and I know there is more for me out there, but I don't know how to get out of this.. any advice will be taken with much appreciation.

  2. #2
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    Have you tried using the word "no" so far?
    Good decisions come from experience. Experience comes from bad decisions.

  3. #3
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    I will say occupy yourself with other matters. It seems he's not absolute in deciding of what he wants. He just trying to use you at his own convenience. When he feels lonely or want to talk. Merely a small gap that's missing in him. You have to concern yourself with your own happiness first. I say try to move on and eliminate whatever reminds you of him. If you still have feelings for him, which I'm sure you probably do, then I will just settle it and go directly to him and talk to him. If you keep letting it on like this, it will keep giving you vague signals. If you directly settle it and ask him what he wants, then you're mind and your feelings for him can be settled.

  4. #4
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    Block/delete all contact.

  5. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by Betsylove View Post
    A part of me thinks he'll come around, and maybe he'll realize there's more to us.
    And that is exactly the problem. There is only more to you in your mind, obviously not in his. I don't think either of you have any idea what's good for you tbh, and he doesn't really seem to know what he wants.

    If you're going to keep fukking him, keep fukking him because you like fukking him and are okay with fukking him with no strings attached, but for God's sake don't do it if you expect a relationship in return. You can't sell your pussy for a relationship, that has no chance of working in any situation.

    Bottom line: He's not committing to you. The sooner you accept that the better off you'll be.
    Last edited by dickriculous; 22-08-13 at 07:11 AM.

  6. #6
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    You have to be strong and stop being a doormat. Learn to say no. Block him, delete him and if he comes to you-be a complete ice cold b**ch and tell him you hope his dick falls off. Tell him hes really bad in bed too and has a small d**k.

    Grow a backbone for f**k sake. People will treat you the way you allow them too. He doent give a s**t about you. Accept it and move on

    also go and get some help. You have severe co-dependency issues and prob low self esteem. Until you learn to respect yourself and set your standards far higher, this will keep happening. Youll dump him and fall into the same trap again with another toxic prick if you dont grow and learn from this experience

    ill just add: this guy is not capable of love so stop hoping he will change. He never will. Hes poison and you really must be blind or stupid if you actually thinks he cares about you.

    Go get tested for STDs too
    "Don't ask a question if you can't handle the answer".

  7. #7
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    Tell yourself this:
    He doesn't love me, he won't ever love me, and he only likes me to **** me. He can **** and probably ****s lots of others too. They can have him now.

    Then ignore him, once ya get past that week of ignoring, you are home free. Imho. It's called self respect get yourself some and move on.

    That's my advice. Take it.
    Life is a song - sing it. Life is a game - play it. Life is a challenge - meet it. Life is a dream - realize it. Life is a sacrifice - offer it. Life is love - enjoy it.

  8. #8
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    What a waste of some perfectly good orgasms and passion. How many more years are you going to prevent yourself from finding a man that will give you everything including companionship on top of the passion and oragasms?

    The longer you don't get the strength to tell him that you're over being each others little playthings the longer you will be unable to be open in heart and mind to find yourself a good man to share your successful life with.

    Know that you will NEVER speak to him again once you get the self-respect to cut this shit off. He's your drug and you can't quit ANY drug without going cold turkey and NEVER using it again.

    You're 23 and if you were my daughter I'd kick your ass good for getting yourself addicted to some dicks, dick. This is addiction, its certainly not love.
    “The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs.” ~Joan Didion

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