In love with each other but both in "relationships". Are we ever going to be together

[Ditsydoris]

I am in love with someone who is also in love with me. Unfortunately we are both in relationships ( I use that term loosely ) and fear we will never be together. My partner and I have 2 kids but sleep in separate rooms. We lead different lives and are in the same house for no other reason than we cannot agree on a sale of the property and will both come out with very little to secure either of our futures. My "friend" is about to have divorce papers served by his wife but he has 2 kids as well and is in a similar situation to me. We have not been having an affair, we have not been behind our partners backs in the sense that we do not meet up or carry on in any fashion. However we have a history from many years ago and cannot shake it. His wife is vindictive at the best of times, my partner has never grown up. It is inevitable we will both be single in the next year but cannot ever see being together. So much baggage and financial problems loom. I can't bear it. When we meet, in social events, we don't even need to speak to understand each other. After meeting at the hospital bed of a very close friend recently ( coincidental) we went for a drink and he admitted to me ( sober ) that I am the one that got away. I love him immensely. We have shared the odd text ( his wife checks his phone so it is all pleasantries ) but I foresee so many problems I wonder whether it is worth it to even dream of a future? I am now 36 but first met him 20 years ago and our lives have crossed paths repeatedly. Any advice? Am I chasing a long held dream?

[4 ratties]

Do u have a career? Why can't u get a place of your own? Even a two bed room apartment or small house so that u can start dating the man of your dreams and your kids don't have to watch two parents that don't love eachother anymore

[michelle23]

ya life cud be simple. we humans make everything so complicated. get a job if you dont have one already, separate from him and share custody with your ex and start dating this man if/when he gets the balls to do the same..

one thing though? y are u leaving the family home with your kids? if you went to court you would keep the house and he would have to help you pay for it as long as his children live there..

[bankitdrew]

I feel like I'm in a very similar situation. In that, she is currently in a long term relationship and just bought a house with him, whereas I am recently single after my gf moving out. I suppose the main thing that isn't similar is that I do not know if my ex ex still loves me the way I do for her. How do you know this about your ex?


I feel like I've tried everything to move on and nothing has worked. My last ditch effort was to write her a letter telling her exactly how I feel. I sent it an hour ago and also posted it in this forum hoping for some advice. You could try doing that