Dumped to get back with her ex... My long story

[Magicsponge]

Everyone has an evil side that will come out when pushed... mine just came out. I messaged her again asking for some of my stuff back and I get a facebook message from her new/old boyfriend, telling me to leave her alone or he'll call the police (lol, I've not threatened her or been anything but nice to her during this). I couldn't resist the temptation to unsettle him a bit from his perspective that everything is going to be rosy from here on. There were a few messages exchanged in which I told him that he would never trust her again, no matter how much he told himself he would, that he'd always be looking over his shoulder, checking for the next guy, that there were things I could tell him about our relationship that I would be happy to tell him, that I was sure she wouldn't have come clean about (but asking would obviously meant that he didn't trust her - dilemna for him), told him that two cheaters belong together and that I wouldn't have her back, and ended by telling him to enjoy what he'd 'won'... he evidently couldn't handle any more of the truth because now he's blocked me off Facebook too, lol!

She messaged me once during this exchange, telling me again that she was happy and I should leave it and find someone else. I replied politely that I cared about what happened to her, hoped she'd be happy but could never have her back as I wouldn't be able to trust her. I told her I didn't think she was a bad person, just mentally trapped.

I must admit, after all that, I feel a little better... don't know if it'll last though :/

[smackie9]

Are you done now? such a waste of energy.

[Magicsponge]

Well, it seems to have achieved little, as feeling better didn't last long. I already feel a bit of regret for my actions last night. I even went to far as to text her again, saying that I hope she'll remember me well for the good times we had, and that I was sorry if I had upset her... no response, but that was expected.

I need to give this no contact a try, but am finding it very hard. I do miss her and what we had. Much of my social life over the past few months depended on her and last night was the first Saturday night I spent in and alone in as long as I can remember. It made me sad to think about her out having a good time with him, doing the same things as we had done only a week earlier.

So, I'll try and restrain myself and will let you know how I get on.

[smackie9]

Well that explains it....you need to build a social life that isn't dependent on some girl you are dating.


btw .....you think she wore that dress out of fond memories for you??? NO! she wore it to look good for him.....she is that kind of person....self entitled bitch......she used you as an escape and that is all you meant to her. Stop being a wuss....the more you beg, whine and cry at her the less she will see you as a man.

[Magicsponge]

No Smackie, I'm not fool enough to think she wore the dress out of any fondness, but I couldn't resist telling him I bought it and have been out with her looking like that

Anyway, I've had a good stern word with myself today and decided that the desperate text bombardier act needs to stop... its certainly not making me appear any more attractive to her. So I'm going for it with the no contact from now on. I did message her this morning because I found a bit of her stuff in my car that I knew she would need back. I simply told her this, with no sad pleas and received an "f-off stop harassing me" in return lol. I do need to return her things though, so I'm planning on leaving them on her doorstep, knocking on the door and leaving quickly. She'll think it's because I'm scared of her boyfriend, but in reality I don't think seeing her at this point would be productive.

Am going to try keeping my mind and body active to ward off the feelings of loneliness that I've been experiencing. My plan is to hold out for 3-4 weeks and then reassess how I feel about her. If I still feel affections towards her, I might look at pursuing them, though chances are, as you have said, I won't.

Wish me luck!

[smackie9]

What part of F off do you not understand? Pursue? are you that f ucking insane? dude get a grip.

Oh and btw throw her shit in the trash...you don't score point returning it.. you make yourself look like a weak ass p ussy. Stop coddling this bitch.

[VerticalMoon]

You really need to find other things to do with your time. The only thing that will make you feel better is getting on with your life. She was never worthy of any of the time you spent on her in the first place. There's a whole world out there for you with friends, families, hobbies. Don't let a silly, doltish girl continue to have control over you. Put your time into other things like you did before you met her. When your life is busy, you'll find that going no contact and letting her go will be easier.

[smackie9]

Yes hopefully you will meet someone that is emotionally available to you.....stay away from someone with baggage.....starting fresh is a good idea. Best of luck

[Ginger2013]

"f-off stop harassing me"

Your actions have caused her to hate and resent you, so the following sounds a little psycho to me...

If I still feel affections towards her, I might look at pursuing them.

I think you need a reality check. She doesn't want you. You've somehow blocked the truth, thinking that her "f-off" statement was not serious. Pardon me for saying, but you sound a little egotistical because she's been clear she wants nothing from you. In 3-4 weeks, you should be well on your way to moving on and dating other girls, not planning to pursue someone who told you to f-off, this could be considered harassment and make her hate you even more. The only luck I wish you is to see things for what they are.

[Magicsponge]

Your actions have caused her to hate and resent you, so the following sounds a little psycho to me...



I think you need a reality check. She doesn't want you. You've somehow blocked the truth, thinking that her "f-off" statement was not serious. Pardon me for saying, but you sound a little egotistical because she's been clear she wants nothing from you. In 3-4 weeks, you should be well on your way to moving on and dating other girls, not planning to pursue someone who told you to f-off, this could be considered harassment and make her hate you even more. The only luck I wish you is to see things for what they are.

Yes, I wish I'd acted with a little more restraint in the immediate aftermath, but I was in panic mode with disbelief that a relationship could go from great to over, with her moving on in the space of about 12 hours. As for the f-off, she used to tell him the same quite often while we were together, when he used to bombard her with messages. She's got a quick temper and swears quite a lot. Anyway, I've already started to realise that she probably isn't right for me, and after the 3-4 weeks, I should be well over her (hopefully).

[Ginger2013]

For you, the relationship went from great to over. For her, it wasn't so. We always think in terms of just us when there is a break up. Not that you need to defend her, but if you hold on to "the relationship went from great to over" and react with so much disbelief, it'll drive you nuts. Go on OKCupid or Plenty of Fish, message some girls and just flirt around (no need to meet for dates yet), it'll make you feel better I'm sure, bring back some self-esteem and hopefully make you see there are so many nice women out there who won't treat you as a rebound.

[Magicsponge]

What part of F off do you not understand? Pursue? are you that f ucking insane? dude get a grip.

Oh and btw throw her shit in the trash...you don't score point returning it.. you make yourself look like a weak ass p ussy. Stop coddling this bitch.

She unblocked me today on Facebook so that she could message me asking me to drop her things off outside her house today. In doing so I got to see her new profile picture of them both together (how lovely!). This also means she's deleted my phone number or she would have messaged me that way. Anyway, I've not responded, but as it's Facebook, she knows I've seen the message. There's no way I'm going to fetch like a dog whenever she says so after how she's treated me... she'll just have to wait until I decide it's convenient.

[LifeInflux]

She unblocked me today on Facebook so that she could message me asking me to drop her things off outside her house today. In doing so I got to see her new profile picture of them both together (how lovely!). This also means she's deleted my phone number or she would have messaged me that way. Anyway, I've not responded, but as it's Facebook, she knows I've seen the message. There's no way I'm going to fetch like a dog whenever she says so after how she's treated me... she'll just have to wait until I decide it's convenient.

Now that you got the message, block her.

[smackie9]

Yay!!!! some progress!

[4 ratties]

Haha keep her shit. Let her call the cops or something to get it back. She is such a bitch lol