What am I doing wrong? No sex

[lalalita]

Your dating sexually incompatible women. I don't necessarily think you're "doing" anything "wrong" other than just dating the wrong types of women. Some people just have low sex drives. I've dated lots of men who come on hot and heavy, and end up barely wanting to make out some time later because they're "not in the mood". Funny how the person with the lower sex drive always seems to "get their way". I've found there is rarely any compromising with these people. Trying to get them in the mood just further frustrates and adds to the feeling of rejection.

What I have found to work, is just backing off completely when it comes to ANYTHING sexual. Not going cold personality or love wise, but just not bringing up sex or coming on to them whatsoever. It usually takes a week or two, but they will usually realize they're suddenly horny. Some people just need a break from constantly being come on to.

[Valixy]

If things were different with her ex, her sex drive might not be that low. I still think that she is either still thinking of him, affected by the abusive emotional relationship they had and maybe needing uncounsciouly a certain tension she got used to, or she is incapable of connecting totally with you because you might not be her type, even if she sees you as an attractive guy and would like to be able to give you all her heart and body to you.

Things don't have to be extraordinary in the bedroom in the first four months of the relationship, there is always time for perfecting, but the attraction must be present and the desire to respond to you. Could things improve if there is lack of sufficient attraction on her side? My personal opinion is that it's not possible, attraction exists or doesn't, you can't work on it the same way you would do it with romantic feelings, communication or other aspects of the relationship, but it's just my opinion.

[basilandthyme]

"Knight in shining armour" "a perfect man to her" Sorry mate, but you're sounding a bit up yourself. I don't know if this has anything to do with the problem.

Look, any guy can give hot oil rubs and bring flowers and wine. But what about your emotional connection with her? Do you crack each other up with laughter? Do you share the same morals and ethics? Are your goals in life the same?

I noticed that you glossed over my question about your long working hours as being "sad that you do so many hours". But the question still stands: do you get enough quality time with her? Sure, a Friday night with wine sounds good - but it may not be enough to sustain the emotional connection she needs. Does she complain about not getting enough time with you?

[dem862]

Some women put up walls for guys to climb, just to prove he really wants her. Just sayin'.

[Agnus]

I love her and I always have. She loves me back and we promise that we will be together forever. I've had a talk with her about my low confidence due to my last relationship. I was called ugly a lot from her and I know I'm not. I get hit on often by attractive women but I immediately stop it because I am very loyal. She tells me things like you look so hott right now blah blah etc.. So hopefully it's not a looks thing because she is bombshell beautiful and I'm up there but definitely not as beautiful as her.. But kinda my main thing I want to get out of this is: do I act uninterested this way she has the urge? Do I stop being such a perfect man to her and throw in a little bit of asshole type guy in? I just don't want to have her lose what she fell in love with though

Sounds like you don't have rapport with your girl-friend. And you think too much of her and your own ex-partners. Don't think of them. As I already said , use your imagination. Imaging your girl-friend and penetrate inside of her with your mind, the deeper the better. You should see pictures like on TV. This way you will enter the Astral Plane and deal not with her physical body but her Astral Body. Physics practice that. It's a brutal technique actually. Your girl-friend will have nothing to do but to reveal her inner being if she has nothing to hide from you or start fighting and running away like crazy if she's making a fool of yourself. You might want to familiarize yourself with Physic Seduction:

http://www.mindreality.com/psychic-seduction-turn-others-on-with-your-mind

[Sonnikss]

Some women put up walls for guys to climb, just to prove he really wants her. Just sayin'.

What if next time you ignore those cross legs and pushing away? Just for a minute or two, impose your desire a little and see what happens. Some women find it sexy.

[okwhat2013]

I think there is something to people having different sex drives, that might be the case here but that doesn't really help. I guess the only thing I can gather from your posts is that you seem overly romantic and maybe in result less "manly" in the sex department. Please don't take this wrong, I think most women like and actually miss the romance nowadays. However, a lot, not all, like once it comes down to actual sex, to be dominated and all out animal desires take over. Especially once they are comfortable with their lover. Sex is a VERY primal thing and our Brains are still hard wired that way. However with that said the best thing is to communicate with her, different women enjoy sex in different ways, it is not a "one size fits all" sort of deal...hahaha that made me laugh. Anyway, make her want it, and yes It does happen when the women in the relationship is begging for sex.

[searock]

Your girlfriend doesn't have a low sex drive, she just doesn't feel like having sex with you, and this is because the emotional connection and intimacy isn't strong enough, or isn't of the "right" kind. My ex boyfriend probably thought I had a low sex drive, when in fact I didn't want to have sex with him because I wasn't in love with him, plain and simple. The more he tried to initiate the more annoyed I got. I think she isn't in love with you.

[TablesandChairs]

Is she attracted to you or in love with you? Doesn't seem that way. I think you treat you well and she adores you for it...but the 'spark', sexually, is not there for her. She might love you, but she's not in love.

In other words...it's not her allergies.