Should I Be Concerned or Move On?

[ladyluck87]

The same married guy that I previously posted about fell off the face of the Earth on Monday morning. I won't say that I am TOO worried but maybe just a tad bit.

We first met about a month ago, and kind of kicked up the notch on our friendship about two weeks ago. We've been out on a few lunch dates together, he's been to my home, and we talk/text every day. He called me on Friday, and he told me that he was going out of town for work this week as he is in the military. I responded, and said "Okay". He said "You're not used to men who actually have to work huh?" and I said "No, I'm used to dating soldiers who lie to me about having to go away for work truthfully." and he was like "Well, I don't have to do all of that. I will send pics if you want me too" and I replied "Sure, you can do that if you want." and he says, "Even better, I'll post them on Instagram". I told "That's cool. You can send them to me too." and I laughed. He laughed and responded, "Don't be selfish. Let me share the pictures with the world too." and I said "Sounds good to me!"

We texted a couple more times that night, and we spoke on Saturday for his daughter's birthday party. I texted him on Sunday to wish him a very happy birthday, and he said "thanks. how are you? how;s your day?" and the whole 9. I asked him when he was leaving again, and he said "Tuesday morning" and I responded back with, "Oh. Okay. : / " I texted him good night, and we briefly spoke. Finally, i woke up early on Monday morning and told him to have a great day at work and he wanted to know why I was up so early. I told him that I didn't know. He said "Oh okay. Well, I have to go. Be back". I didn't hear from him all day so I texted him Monday night and said, "Safe travels". I have not heard anything from him since then. I haven't seen him on Facebook, and his last login on What's App was Monday at 5:00 am. Since we started hanging out heavily for the last couple of weeks, he has been/seemed genuinely interested and responds within five minutes or less to my messages.

I'm not really sure what to think. Any thoughts? Don't want to keep reaching out like a crazed psycho. I'm sure he's fine though.

[basilandthyme]

You now say that he's married. So, can we assume you had the conversation and know this for sure? What is the situation with his wife?

As for him not messaging, could it be that he's busy doing soldier stuff? I think it's sad in this day and age that people are expected to be constantly in contact.

[Starnique]

You're keeping up with him like your the wife and not the mistress. Anyway, that's what happens when you decide to share a man. He has other obligations and you are not his first priority. Did that ever cross your mind ladyluck?

To answer your question, Yeah, you don't want to seem too pressed. Don't hit him up again. I'm sure he got the message. I would wait it out as hard as it is sometimes. He'll hit you up or sooner or later. If a week or so go by, then try again but nine times out of ten, he'll hit you back. Either way don't sweat him.

[ladyluck87]

You now say that he's married. So, can we assume you had the conversation and know this for sure? What is the situation with his wife?

As for him not messaging, could it be that he's busy doing soldier stuff? I think it's sad in this day and age that people are expected to be constantly in contact.

You know what? I'm going to stop calling him the married guy because everyone is thinking I'm KNOWINGLY messing with an actively married man. I only call him that because of my suspicions. Still have no idea. I'm waiting until the next time we are together to tackle that mystery.

I really don't want to press him too much. At this point, I am not reaching out anymore. I'm satisfied with the conversation just to let him know that I was thinking of him. However, most of my friends are up in arms saying it doesn't matter what his circumstance is that he should have reached out, and he is just giving me excuses. I'm not too sold on that...our interaction today was fine IMO. I don't need much more than that from him.

Me: "Hey!!! Hope you're okay. I know you're busy on your trop. Hope it's going well!!"

Him: Thanks..Message you in a bit.

Me: Ok

Him: What are you doing?

Me: Driving into NYC. How are you?

Him: Im good. Why are you driving there? You're always on the go.

Me: Good. I was wondering if you were alright since I hadn't heard from you.

Him: Oh ok. Yeah, I was down. My grandmom had a heart attack yesterday. But is recovering well.

Me: Oh ok. I'm sorry to hear that. Hope she continues to get better. Phone is dying. Sorry about your grandmother again. I'll keep you and yours in my prayers.

Him: Okay.

[ladyluck87]

You're keeping up with him like your the wife and not the mistress. Anyway, that's what happens when you decide to share a man. He has other obligations and you are not his first priority. Did that ever cross your mind ladyluck?

To answer your question, Yeah, you don't want to seem too pressed. Don't hit him up again. I'm sure he got the message. I would wait it out as hard as it is sometimes. He'll hit you up or sooner or later. If a week or so go by, then try again but nine times out of ten, he'll hit you back. Either way don't sweat him.

Whoa nena! Like I said before...gonna stop calling him "married" until I figure his ACTIVE and CURRENT marital status.

Thank you for your advice regardless though. I wish I had read this before I sent the message at noon.

[Starnique]

You're so welcome. Good luck.